Regardless whether it's legal or not at your country, I'm interested to know if you can imagine yourself a part of such relationship!
"Polygamy: the practice or custom of having more than one wife" Could be also man and GFs
As a woman what do you feel, jealous! or u r gonna think positively to become ur man most desirable woman in the relationship. It might be a bit imaginary question for your society but for others, it's common practice that man can have multiple wives! NB: don't reply from the feminism POV, I know it's totally rejected idea by feminists!
The photo is for a Mormon guy from Utah is called Darger, he has three wives and 25 children. 😎👌
It doesn't work for me. Not that I tried it. I think it degrades people's value and identity. From the history on this issue in my country, this conduct has been proven that it's not a smart choice for men. Generally speaking, a smart man won't choose to have many wives. Since it would become political and leads to domestic violence or even war, polygamy nowadays is considered that it's not an ideal type of relationship. Competition between women must not be underestimated. Plus, men who desire to get a lot of partners are not desirable. They are less caring. They focus on their own status rather than a healthy, good environment of the family.
I compare this behavior to chimpanzees. Clearly, it's not a human act. If a man's preference is to own a harem, regarding to an evolutionary analysis, it implies that deep down he's insecure that his partner would cheat on him and gets pregnant with other male. Having multiple partners is like diversification. Yet, there's a flaw. Relationship is different from financial investment. Emotions and the feeling of unfairness exist. In a monogamous relationship, if a woman cheats, it's mostly because she feels unwanted, not enough attention from her lover. Therefore, the more women in one relationship means the less time for each female. Thus, this could cause some women to look for attention from somebody else outside where they are.
That's why I see there are more of cons than pros in polygamy. I'd be worried about risks of getting diseases from shared partners. Less attention to an individual; less time to keep her on track. If one of the women turns out she's not honest and seeks for her personal special treatment, all of us would be doomed. Moreover, if children are involved, it's a lot worse. It's impossible to be equal. Justice is Just Ice when it comes to human affection. We're all biased. Everybody who has siblings knew this too well already. Who is the most beautiful? Who is the most loving? Who is the cleverest? This is hard to be evaluated. Which child would be the heir? There's a term of legal perspective that can't be overlooked as well.
I'll put it this way: I don't share well with others, particularly the man I'm dating.
I think polygamy is nonsense. It's just an excuse to sleep around and have multiple partners without committing to one person. All that, "I love more than one person..." is bull. Most poly relationships or marriages do NOT last! But if people want to live with way, it's not my place to judge.
I just don't want to hear them whining when they're partner (s) leave them or things fall apart because they realize they don't like sharing their partner with other people.
@lachendw Actually sir I've met two. Both couples were looking for more partners.
Note how I said "were." Both cases failed. One of them ended with the wife filing for divorce and the husband staying with the girlfriend, now wife. The first wife got tired of sharing her husband with other women.
The other couple I knew, I still talk to them on a semi regular basis but they have issues meeting people willing to be with both of them. Either they want just the wife or the guy... not both of them 🙄 Imagine that.
How can you make such a shallow statement as that without even knowing the person. I'm polyamory but you no nothing about me so you cannot speak on my character
I am a liberal so I think the legal system should handle these kind of arrangements, however I don't see it as a priority. If we should allow it should be any combination of groups of people. I say just skip the whole marriage idea and just buy a house/farm or whatever together and share it however you want if you can find a group that can last with that type of open sexual relationships. So you can do this already today in most countries. I personally think getting a relationship to work is hard getting three in balance that would be required for a 3 person group is much much harder. So the only way to get a group like this to work is if the relationship culture lack demands on the relationship. So only people that enjoy casual sex is really candidates and they probably don't want to limit themselves to a predetermined group of people.
I'm sorry but this is out of the topic subject, as it's religious and it's mainly a comparison to show cons and pros of polygamy, which isn't the topic aim
The aim is to explore the women tolerance to accept polygamy relationship if she's part of this relationship and I mentioned clearly it could be between man and GFs not limited to marriage.
Moreover the provide article is very weird and promote for a kind of racism against Muslims/ Islam as it shows all Muslims are bombers or terrorists because of polygamy! Which is very sarcastic 😂😂
@karangill Who says polygamy is only about temporary desires? Do people get married only for the sole purpose to have sex? I'm sure some people do, but it's meant to be a deeper relationship and partnership than that. Certainly polygamy isn't for everyone, but just because some choose it doesn't mean there's something wrong with them.
Not for me. The only cases woman I know that engage in this kind of relationship are either from certain religions and so have been taught to accept this kind of relationship. Or either have too low self esteem and would let a man set any type of relationship even if the end hurt emotionally as long as they can be with him.
Most women in polygyny usually give a fake smile and say it works fine, but some studies showed that there's always a favourite and except for that one, the rest of the women doesn't feel as loved and in a long run end to be unfulfilled emotionally, causing low self esteem, jealousy and constant negative feelings.
The only point of polygyny is instrumental. Is beign able to reproduce more and faster. That's why it's liked to some religions, because those religions want to grow up as a way to have more followers as a way to be stronger against other religions.
Yeah.. some dumb religions with insecure religious leaders do encourage such things. So creepy when they say I want more children so that I can make my religion strong. Mental people
Eh, no thank you. Not my thing. I don't want to compete for my partner's full attention and love. Sex would be awful too since it will probably be 2 mins of thrusting and then he goes to another woman. Some men can barely last with one woman, can't imagine with 3 lol. That's not the life for me. I don't care what other people do in their relationships since it isn't harming or affecting me at all. But I would never be part of polygamy. Unless.. I'm the one who has 3 husbands lol
Haha thank you. I'd accept it if it was just for fun like a foursome. But an actual married relationship? I'd still say no lol it is just easier to be in a monogamous relationship because you know that person only loves you and no one else. And all his attention is on you and only you. While in polygamy, that love and attention is shared and well.. Don't think many people like to share lol
In that instance, Could i have 2 or 3 husbands too? Or maybe a couple wives too as I'm bisexual... If the dude is not OK with that.. Why should i be okay with him wanting more than one wife... Tho I'm not really into marriage to begin with... If i was i wouldn't like to have to compete for my partners attention... Like having siblings... Ew... As for an unmarried couple... If my partner gets a harem, i get a harem... I ain't the bitch to wait around... Abd at that point you better just see other people to begin with
I think it's just a matter of person's character. E. g. I'm clearly polygamous and have multiple partners, I'm in an open relationship with my husband, but he doesn't have any partner besides me cause he isn't interested. He tried having sex with someone else out of interest, but said that maybe his monogamous cause he doesn't enjoy getting intimate with other women. But I wouldn't like to be engaged in a polygamous marriage and be one of multiple wives while being forbidden to have multiple partners. That would feel sick for me, I would feel like I have to share something that is only my own. Also, I wouldn't like to have responsibilities and obligations towards sister wives and their children and giving birth to my own children in such a marriage would be a torture for me. It all depends
Your breakdown is much more in depth than I think many people who are for, or against this whole conversation. Necessarily take into account. In reality you are basically living with 12 total relationships. All in the same living space. At least I would imagine that would have to be the case. Otherwise its more along a free love commune than a "Sister Wives" set of circumstances. I can't imagine that there isn't some amount of bitterness, or feeling like favorites are being played between 1, or multiple layers of this specific instance. Someone is going to eventually feel left out, or feeling they aren't getting enough attention. Be it emotional, sexual, etc. It seems like an inevitability to me.
Currently no. However, I may consider it eventually if that feels right.
Relationships need to be built on trust, love and respect. If all people in the relationship have these values than it can be positive regardless of the number of people. I believe in all of those people having a bond meaning all hold an intimate relationship with eachother and not just one person in the relationship.
Whatever floats your boat really. Currently I am in a monogamous relationship, however life, feelings, humans and love are very complicated and I won't close my doors to anything in the future.
If all the partners are fine with and aren't pressured to accept another person as their partner's partner then I don't see any problem with that, as long as the guy also is able to balance out between his partners and doesn't give some more attention than others.
But personally, I wouldn't ever agree to it for myself, it's just not my thing, I'm a jealous person and I want my guy for myself just like I am all his and no one else's.
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Anonymous
(30-35)
+1 y
Nope, nope nope... My ex turned out to be polyamorous and wanted to go back to his ex, and be with the both of us... Just cannot. It broke my heart and we had not been together for that long and I was just broken... I cannot see how others can be in such a situation.
Well as long as it is 100% consensual with no indoctrinated or coercion or gaslighting or brainwashing involved, I don’t give a rats ass. And no, I don’t see myself involved in that kind of relationship since I don’t care for marriage. But even just as a “girlfriend” thing, I’d lean towards a no but if I really liked the dude then I’d consider it. Sex would be completely off the table tho.
In my traditions long ago, it was not unusual for a man to have multiple wives. A man can marry up to four women. But for me I can't handle the fact my husband can have another wife. We both have the same culture and beliefs but he won't do it. I'm exclusive for him. Or if he wants 4 wives... me with a hijab, me with no hijab, me with straight hair, me with curly hair 😝
Well if you're really polygamous, you have to be ok with your girls being so also. Otherwise you're just a selfish and greedy pig. I'd had a boyfriend who cheated on me plenty, blaiming it on his not being able to help it because he has polygamous nature. But when I suggested an open relationship, he would become very irritated or upset.
I had a teacher back in school who had 4 wives the man could barely walk. you could see the wear and tear on his face from having to keep all 4 satisfied.
It's not the endless bliss harem you'd imagine.
Definitely not for me (also not acceptable religiously so there's that).
I'd love an orgy with many girls just as much as the next guy but to have to provide for all of them is too much
I would get sick of sharing my husband with other women pretty soon so I could not be in a polygamous relationship. But I do think it should be legal for any adult to have multiple spouses as long as each person signs a document whenever their spouse marries someone else, to verify that they’re aware of the new marriage. I’m a feminist but I wouldn’t consider this a total rejection.
as long as everyone in this kind of relationship is okay with it, there is no problem with polygamy. it also exists "for" women, and its called polyandry.
but i prefer talking about free love / open relationships; my point of view is that if a man wants to have several girlfriends, that would be great too if the women can have several boyfriends too
Oh Geeze seriously? OK I'm not a girl but it sounds like a pain in the ass. I struggle with unigamy. Two or three? Yeah... and what about a woman having 3 doods? I guess there is the pain in the ass right? Sorry boys you're on your own this week. Aunt Flo is in town.
There are four people who will all have to get along in many different dynamics for each marriage to work out. The four people are: guy, woman A, woman B, woman C 1. guy and woman A 2. guy and woman B 3. guy and woman C 4. woman A and woman B 5. woman A and woman C 6. woman B and woman C 7. guy and woman A and woman B 8. guy and woman A and woman C 9. guy and woman B and woman C 10. woman A and woman B and woman C 11. guy and woman A and woman B and woman C
I know it looks selfish and all but polygamy is what nature intended. And So did Kings and lords😁. Many wives mean many children to carry the genes forward but The other way makes less sense mind you.. No matter how many husbands, u can still give birth only one child at a time..
So polygamous relationship where a guy with many wives is normal if you wish to be a part of.
Yup. But it's not everybody's cup of tea. if the guy is Rich and can handle things well, they don't seem to mind. So naturally very few such relationship in any society
Consenting adults shoyld be able to enter any relationship they wish. If multiple individuals can make a relationship work, however that works, then good luck to them. Whether a man with multiple wives, a woman with multiple husbands, or any combination of men/women that works for them.
I'm a very jealous person so polygamy would never work for me and I have a really hard time understanding how anyone could be ok with it but it's not my place to dictate what other people do. If that's what you're into go for it.
Some cultures use it as a support and financial system, but when it comes to love, it seems to be a bit unfair and unbalanced. At least in a heterosexual poly relationship, one person is getting all the love and the attention but can't reciprocate 100%. Anyway, I don't know how people on poly relationships do it. I'm a selfish bitch 😂😂😂
honestly I don't feel like it's bad or immoral unless it's like one guy and 4 wives. humans can love two or even more people at the same time, so to me a three people couple or something like that is cool. more love ^^
People like that are sick. The women dont even love each other its just a constant fight of getting love of that one guy. Its basically just a life where the guy has all the power and i dont like that idea
The guy is usually more dominant bc he has 3 or more girls behind him. If one girl starts to act up he can literally just be like go idc i got 2 more. Plus he can literally choose with who he wanna sleep with that night have sex with like 3 girls. Nah thats way to many privileges for a dude. Its weird as fuck
Not all partners in a polyamorous relationship live together. Maybe in his situation they do but not everyone dynamic is like that. If it's true polyamory it's not just about sex. It means loving more than one. The woman is also allowed to have more than one relationship
I may not be a girl but I think its gross, stupid, and is near perfect breeding ground for psychological damage. Much like huffing ground up mold & kerosene in moist dumpster.
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Anonymous
(18-24)
+1 y
No offence but I bet that some horny man made up that polygamy was acceptable then pretended God wanted it. Clearly there’s some hidden motivations behind it
What you're describing is POLYGYNY. The counterpart to that being POLYANDRY - one woman with several men. POLYGAMY is the general term to describe relationships with more than two partners involved. In any case, if all participants are genuinely happy with it, there's nothing wrong with it.
100% never going to happen with me. I don’t share nor do I want to be shared. It may be good for some people and I’m not someone to judge but as far as for myself, no.
Haha those poor girls marrying your man :D Just imagine a guys purposes to you and you explode in joy even you accept to share him with another woman but after marrying you realize there are two you have to get services to! Haha haha strap on? Maybe
May be good for the guy but not the females. The guy gets sex every night while the woman may get some every 3 days if she is lucky. I suppose they could have a foursome but again, that is to the man's advantage, not the woman's.
Marriage isn't just about sex, but even if it were, judging by society's view (though likely true) of sexual apatite, men have far more desire for sex than women. Your estimate sounds like a sensible proportion. Polygamy is not for everybody, not even me, and it doesn't have to be, but I don't see why it should be shunned when other unconventional behaviors are praised.
It’s not about being jealous I simply do not like to share. What’s mine is mine and that’s what makes it awesome.. if what I can have of someone, anyone can have? Then I don’t want it.
People who let their partner have multiple partners have no self respect for themselves whatsoever, it's disgusting and not at all even close to the definition of a relationship, polygamy just needs to die out honestly, you can't be "in love" with multiple people.
I'm fine with it if everyone consents. I would have 0 interest in this. It's a double whammy because the woman has to share and is still expected to be monogamous to their husband who gets multiple partners. So yeah miss me with all that.
If it works for other, then great for them, it's their right.
I've never been with anyone before, but I don't think it'd work for me, but if it did, I think I'd prefer to share my woman with another woman and we'd all live together.
It's not for me but I can see some of the benefits. If you don't want to spend time with your husband or if you need help with kids/housework you can call upon your sister wives and I'm sure they'd pitch in.
2
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Anonymous
(18-24)
+1 y
not for me. i just feel like you cheating with your wives if that makes sense. like cheating with your wife on your wife. i just feel like, you have a love of your life, not these loves of my life.
I mean as a man, I don't have any issues with it. Just that it would be practically impossible to handle so many wives at once. It's a physical, emotional, and financial exhaustion.
On the positive side, you get to sleep with all of them too ;)
The most utopian version of this I have seen is in a book called/named 'the moon is a harsh mistress' but it concerns a whole family (I think, if I remember correctly).
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Anonymous
(30-35)
+1 y
I will do an agreement... For my daughter in future. As you should not getting marry other woman while marrying my daughter.
If you wanna do polygamy, then divorce my daughter and marry other woman who you wish...
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