Been a month since we last talked, should I call or wait?

[EddieJoh]

OK, so there was this I was seeing for most of October to mid-November. We’re both at uni and she’s a first year. We casually dated (about 4/5 times, basically once a week). On our last date she sad that she wasn’t ready for a relationship as there was a lot of trouble with her ex (who cheated on her) and she wanted to have fun at uni and couldn’t give me what I wanted. She said we could still ‘see’ each other but only if I was okay and we kept it as it was. I told her I wasn’t – drunkenly told her I was falling for her and gave her a week to think about it. Well after a week she still said she wasn’t ready. She’d rushed into her last relationship and said she didn’t want to screw it up with me. So after a few ignored calls I decided that this was the end and a brush off.

A week later I get a drunken text saying how she’s sorry she was such a bitch to me. She then ignores my call the next day so I leave it. A week later I told her to tell me what she wanted. Two choices: Tell me to back off or meet me the next day (uni was breaking up at the weekend). She replies saying she’s sorry if my feelings were hurt and she hopes I have a good Christmas – so in fact didn’t answer.

It’s been a month now of no contact (Christmas holiday) and I’ve been thinking about her a bit. Mainly that I don’t want it to be awkward when I see her again. Should I contact her (maybe a friendly Facebook message – we’re both up late most nights and I see her on online chat but am not sure whether I should) or wait til I bump into her (Which we do a lot) back at uni.

[silverfox]

She may not like you more than a friend, but with the recent troubles that she has had it causes low self esteem and I hope you don't take it the wrong way...you are probably her self esteem booster. Girls don't do it on purpose, but after a failed relationship especially one that cheated on her a girl can feel like they aren't very pretty, funny, etc. Then when you involve alcohol they may need to feel the need to be wanted so that results in the drunken text messages. I suggest not to push for a relationship and keep it a friendship.