I really need advice, can someone please help?

Question

i’m a junior in high school and there would be times were i would have fun. but i always had friend groups that broke up. i would always end up being alone. especially last year, i had a friend but she would leave to go somewhere at lunch. and sometimes i’d sit on the floor or in a class. it didn’t always hurt but i just felt alone. all i have rn is one friend and she’s not a good one. and i just make myself deal with it because i don’t wanna be alone. this year we did online school but it was ok for people to do public school. summer is less than a month away and my mom tells me now that she’s gonna put me back in public school. she’s aware that being in that place puts me in the worst mental state possible. literally the second i go in there, my blood pressure goes up and i feel uneasy. i constantly worry about everything i do or say. because i’m very insecure. i tried to work on myself a lot but it never works. i just feel even worse. it’s to a point where i can’t even look at myself in the mirror. i’m also worried about going to school and being by myself again. i dont want that at all. i tried to reach out to some of my online friends. i just got no responses and “well I don't know how to help you with that.” i keep trying to talk to my mom but she doesn’t understand it at all. now i’m crying like a idiot. i just don’t know what to do or who to even talk to.

Floppy2112 · Accepted Answer

Hey, as someone who had a horrific high school experience, I can sympathize. You need to build your confidence, most of what you described comes from a lack of confidence. If you can get therapy, please do, because I don't think a young chaotic mind can do it on your own. Whatever stigmas or preconceived notions you may have, drop them. Just get rid of them. Also, use the school counselors. Get them involved in your experience early and often. Believe it or not, they can help you navigate this space. I didn't believe it when I was in high school and I paid dearly for it. Use the resources they have, don't feel ashamed. It's worth it.
You cannot do what I did, to avoid the hell that was high school. They monitor you guys too well. My senior year, I had all my free-periods stacked together with lunch, so I had like 2.5 hours of free time a day. I would get in the car and leave and go places and come back for the afternoon classes. I was so brazen, I just walked out the door, even sat in the parking lot and lowered the convertible top. (No, it wasn't my car it was my parents, but it was cool. It was a 1972 Oldsmobile Delta 88 with a 455 Rocket under the hood. It was a land yacht.) They didn't have cameras and cell phones then. I literally only went to class senior year. My homeroom teacher thought I dropped out because I never went, so she never marked me absent. But, everything is so monitored now, you cannot just leave. So use your resources and work on your confidence. You will make it, just hang in there. I know it feels overwhelming, but you can handle it. But play it smart, get counseling, use your school guidance counselors and maybe get involved in something. A lot of people make their best friends by being involved in drama or some other activity.

Wowie101 · Accepted Answer

Tough love... Life is hard... and school sucks... You need to decide whether you wanna be that girl sitting in the corner of the library all alone. Or the girl in the cafeteria laughing and joking with your friends... now the question is how... you need to be seen... I don’t mean that just like standing there. You need to get other peoples attention. Safely obviously... some girls may do this by dressing Gothic. Another one might be in the gaming and hang with gamers have the best gaming system etc. Find out what you’re into what makes you you and then figure out a way to get everybody to see it... then try... talk to people laugh do things go places... hey anybody want to see a movie it’s on me tonight... you’re gonna fail sometimes. But with great worth comes value... but you stand up and keep going... You’re going to fall pick yourself up afterwards. And stop beating yourself up so much it’s just high school life will continue... I wish you the best of luck and I truly hope you find your way

Gwenhwyfar · Accepted Answer

I wish I could help you but it was never school that made me anxious

OlderAndWiser · Answer

Have you tried reaching out to a school counselor?

AndyOh · Answer

Hi BunnyBoo,
I know the lonely route. As much as I try, I find myself alone a lot, and I don't like it either. I am shy and not the best at social settings. I have run meetings and taught classes, but in the end, I don't socialize well.
For you, I will suggest a few options you might want to try... I mean what else can you do. First and foremost... Like YoU. You have to Love yourself first before you can love anyone else, even friends. So get in front of the mirror and look at all the good qualities you have. We all have bad ones... don't look at those for now.
Second, find a hobby or something you think you like to do or want to learn and get in the club, gym, class, leaning center, bowling ally, play department, etc. and DO it. You will find a whole new group of friends.
Third, learn to like your alone time. You will find that you can get a lot done if you make use of the time... not watching TV either.
Fourth, if you are religious, get involved in your church.
Fifth, get healthy. Eat right, and workout. Do Martial Arts, join a gym, run, whatever you need to do to get your body in top form.
Sixth and final - don't get so down you might want to end it. Never let yourself get there. Talk to someone older if you have to. Life is really a great ride if you keep your head up and keep a positive feel about yourself.
Good Luck. :)

exitseven · Answer

If you are starting your senior year, just try and run down the clock. If you go on to college it will be better for you.
Let the BS just roll off your back. You will leave it all behind in a few months.

SenseiSeptred · Answer

Do your own thing, and don't let other people influence what you really are. Your self-confidence will come along soon, just don't let other people get to you because if they get to you, you are already defeated, and the same goes for knowing a person as well.

GoodGuyBreakingBad · Answer

My suggestion is to look for a therapist and you should be able to get one that can talk to you over a phone, rather than going in person also you should get an evaluation cause it seems you have some Generalized Anxiety Disorder / Mild Depression by all means if going to school makes you sick, reach out to anyone even if you need
to talk to someone from www.nami.org 800-950-nami (6264) these people will help you

buddysboy16 · Answer

I can't help you to feel less alone while at school physically but if you ever wanna chat/vent/talk, feel free to send me a dm. I'm always willing to listen, give advice or just get to know someone.

Dinosaursandanime65 · Answer

I’m not really sure... maybe just wait for a worthy variable

Pulseofsulfur · Answer

If you want a buddy for you to vent your frustrations out you can always leave me a message and I'll try to help you make you a better version of yourself

WalkingBassist · Answer

Back in my day, these assholes would steal my books and beat me up. I had 0 friends, and thought about killing myself everyday. But I found the electric bass and muay thai. If you're good at either of these, you'll always have friends.

Kolega · Answer

I want to talk to you in detail.

scott04sa22 · Answer

If your under 18 then I can’t help you

I really need advice, can someone please help?

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