Girls, should a guy that's overweight wait until he's slimmed down or fit to approach and talk to girls?

[Anonymous]

I get it, being overweight makes you less attractive which is why im worling on myself. But should i just continue to work on that before approaching any girls? I go to the gym 3 times a week & watch what i eat. Im tired of being that guy that can't get anywhere with a girl because of his weight

[Cynicaldreamer]

No. You know why? Because if a girl sees you're making a real effort to improve yourself, she's going to want you regardless of your looks-

... no really, it's true.

Take it from someone that used to be overweight and is now in shape. I've been attracted to, and dated guys that were overweight. I know some people on here will disagree with me, but there are still people out there that value personality just as much, if not more, than looks.

My point is, if you see a girl you're attracted to, yeah, talk to her. Let her know that yes, you're working to actively improve yourself- heck, even ask her would she like to workout with you (if she's a gymrat like myself, I bet she will say yes). You'll have a partner to keep you accountable and motivate you to keep going. Plus once you get in shape, think about it- you'll know she likes you for you, not not just your "fit" appearance.
You don't want a girl that is only dating you because you look good. Because guess what- if you gain the weight back, or something happens to where you're unable to stay in shape, that same superficial woman will leave you.

[hannahjo022]

You should not be worry to lose weight so you can get a girlfriend. You don't want to have a girlfriend that thinks you're fat and make you feel worthless about yourself. You should focus more on your self-worth, happiness, and over all health. I think its attractive when a guy takes care of himself physically and mentally. One of my ex's did not took care of himself and it reflected on me too. I gained 10 pounds while I was with him and was not happy with him. After the breakup I went back to eating healthy and working out again to get the old happy me back again.

[Asker]

But people always recommend to go to the gym and get a certain physique to attract girls

[flamiE]

No, life’s short. Working on yourself is such a turn on so that alone should be enough if she’s the right one. I like to see a man improving before my eyes, I can support him and all that. It’s a lot better than being the absolute best version of himself before we started dating. It’s like he’s blossoming right in front of me lol it’s hard to explain but yeah don’t wait.

[Asker]

I see this but then it looks like girls only want the atheltic which im not complaining. But i do have to put in work to be like that & keep myself motivated

[12100108]

I don’t think a guy should wait. Girls are different some are into the physical appearance and are picky. Some, aren’t. Just be yourself, you’ll know when a girl likes you and when a girl doesn’t. My advice to you is, Continue working on yourself and bettering yourself not just physically, but mentally as well. The dating scene nowadays is a pain in the ass. Guys and girls have a lot of options these days like dating apps. So don’t get your hopes up with the 1st girl who finds you intriguing. Make sure she’s honest, genuine and isn’t toying with your feelings, Because if she is, that type of shit can mess with your head and it’ll result in heartbreak. Don’t pursuit love or chase it. Allow it to come to you on its own good timing. I hope the best to you and good luck! Hope this help! You’re not really missing out on anything good, everyone is whack and forgotten about morals and other peoples feelings. Dating isn’t the same as before, there are new rules new cruel people.

[Asker]

I am being myself but im working on myself to become a better version of myself to increase my chances with women

[jessicake]

No, girls (the right ones) are more willing to see past appearances. Focus on taking care of your mind in addition to your body health. Being a kind and respectful person is more of an attractor than a nice body to me

[Asker]

"The right ones are willing to see past appearences". That's rare though. I don't see a lot of women like that. It would be nice but just seems unlikely

[Starwitch23]

You should continue approaching girls because not everyone is superficial. I saw fit girls dating chubby guys too. Not all women value appearance. My ex got chubbier when we were in a relationship. I still didn't lose any kind of attraction towards him. After all, it is life. We can't stay same always. By the way, you're still doing a great job working on your self.

[malwins]

dating while insecure is gonna be painful af

[Starwitch23]

Exactly

[malwins]

so if he is insecure then he should wait

[iseekpinetrees]

Being fat has nothing to do with being approachable its all about your personality. I dated a guy who was 300 lbs at one point the guy was fun and funny. I didn't care he was big. I knew him when he was smaller too.

[Asker]

Girls will turn you down or won't talk to you if you're overweight. Sharing my experiences. Still working out though

[iseekpinetrees]

Shallow girls will. And that's not the greatest type of person.

[Asker]

Most are then. It sucks but i gotta do what i gotta do to be attractive

[Ukrainianbuddafly]

No. Personally speaking your weight has nothing to do with your character, how you'll treat her or what you can offer. Only a superficial female will care and is that the type you really want or think you deserve?

[Anonymous]

Definitely do not wait! If a girl only likes you when you’ve lost weight she definitely doesn’t like you for the right reasons. If she likes you it should be exactly the way you are, regardless of your weight

[ItsLynn]

No they should talk to to girls regardless if they are looking. You wouldn't want someone who only likes you for your body.

[Asker]

But that's always the advice given. You want to get a girlfriend, you need to get in shape and work out. Go to the gym as much as you can

[ItsLynn]

Well do both at the same time!

[Asker]

Do both what?

[ItsLynn]

Workout and talk to girls why is it only one or the other?

[Asker]

Because im not attractive yet. They only talk to you after you lose weight

[tupacs_only_wife]

Not precisely, some girls are into dad bods and some fall hard for a guy with a charming personality.

[Anonymous]

It’s your decision if you want to lose weight go for it and if you don’t that’s fine too. Me personally I prefer guys who have an athletic or slim build. But everyone has a preference and likes different things.

[Opinion Owner]

if you feel confident in yourself you shouldn’t change for someone else but if you wanna lose weight for yourself to make yourself feel better, then I’d say you should if itll make you feel better about yourself.

[TessCasie]

I’m bit overweight myself but my stomach ain’t that big and protruded it’s semi flat. But if a guy I’m meeting for a date has a big chubby full bloated stomach it’s a turn off.

[TessCasie]

I meant his stomach has a big paunch belly

[MissGeorgia]

It depends how overweight.
If he’s simply got a bit of tummy, that’s fine. it’s actually sexy

[Asker]

Overweight like chubby

[tatianamay]

don't wait. And if you're working out, and making an effort to lose your fat, its a good thing

[Asker]

If i dont wait, girls will reject me because im overweight still

[tatianamay]

There are girls who like chubby men. Go for it. Don’t wait

[Asker]

haven't met them yet. They mostly like muscular or fit and lean guys

[tatianamay]

Okay, well, then lose the extra fat first and yk, maybe get fit. And then approach them. You can get muscles even while dating them

[SpaceNinja04]

Haha 😂 no, absolutely not. Your soulmate could be in any body ❤️

[Asker]

It'll better his chances if he loses the weight though no?

[SpaceNinja04]

Well, if they really really are interested in him weight is nothing. I'd say no. What I'd look more into is how he's communicating to his potential s. o. if I make any sense.

[Aphrodite801]

Are you like 500 pounds or something? There are plenty of fat guys with fat girls. Go date a fellow overweight girl, that simple.

[Asker]

I had dated an overweight girl (2 actually). you're not making me look like a hypocrite here

[Asker]

And im not 500 pounds. But i am chubby

[Aphrodite801]

Ah, I see I have blocked you. Which means you are a sexist. So not only are you a bitter sexist, but you’re overweight too? 😂😂😂

[Asker]

You blocked because you didn't like my opinions

[Madison193]

don't assume people's weight

[Aphrodite801]

Triggered fatty found

[Asker]

Are you gonna block me again because you didn't like my political views?

[Madison193]

@Aphrodite801 it is rude to assume things about people also if you've never been fat you have no room to talk I've been small, medium, and large and in the process of losing it rn but the heck if I become xs just to please society

[Aphrodite801]

Keep crying big girl, big mamaa

[Madison193]

@Aphrodite801 Lol!

[Babygirl_S]

He should wait if he only wishes to date a slim girl.

[Asker]

Yeah that's what im doing. I know slim or curvy girls dont like fat pieces of shit, so im working my ass off, lifting and cardio and eating right too

[anonnonaaa]

I don't think so. But if thats what he wants to do and if thats what makes him comfortable, then sure.

[Anonymous]

My boyfriend is a little overweight but he is going to gym now and already lose some weight

[girl2034]

No fat guys can get girls too

[Asker]

Seems very rare. Im still working on myself though

[Anonymous]

I think you look ok in that photo

[Asker]

Not good enough yet to approach any women though

[Asker]

You dont even know whwt i look like. Im anon

[malwins]

please post a pic

[malwins]

yeah bc if u insecure its gonna bring u down

[Sweetener_]

Definitely