This is going to be a sad question, but why don't people TRULY care about others?

[TenderFantasy]

I'm talking about people offline (in this instance). Maybe I am just frustrated and or depressed I don't know, but when it comes down to it, I don't think many people would give me a kidney (for example) if I needed it. Maybe a family member (okay I know my parents would but they're older than me so...) If I needed money, I'd have to use my credit card or work, NO ONE, unless I was running a GO FUND ME scandal/scheme and played on the heart strings of the gullible, would give me ANY money probably, even if it may save my life. I've been used and victimized by selfish assholes of the opposite sex in the past. Even same sex ones. People just USE me and throw me away if they don't' need me anymore. ... WHY is the world so CRUEL like that? ? ! Is it because of competition for resources? ? ! Or is it just a SADISTIC thing? ! Like they are HAPPY to see others suffering? ? ! Often, I've had to fend for myself and if it WASN'T for me, myself and I, I wouldn't BE where I am today..

... And yet, when I do something that I think has offended or hurt someone, I usually feel bad, but others, it feels like they don't give a sh*t! I mean yeah, maybe I shouldn't expect too much from strangers I don't even know but I hope someone just please understand where I am coming from? ! I didn't realize that life could be like this as a child. There are certain rules I know I have to live by if I want to be successful in this life, it's strange!

[caring__1]

Let's say you are raised in a large family. When you sit down at the dinner table, you'll see everyone grabbing whatever they want. You'll learn very quickly to grab what you can before someone else grabs it first. We want to believe others care about us, but selfishness breeds selfishness. You won't even realize you're being selfish, seeing your actions as what is necessary to survive. We tend to copy what is familiar... not necessarily what is functional.

In an idealistic world, people would care about others. Do you see any signs that Putin cares about Ukrainians? Since there are so many selfish inconsiderate people in the world, be observant. See people's true patterns rather than only what you want to see or blindly believe the empty promises they never follow through on. Believing others will change for you is dysfunctional and will always lead to frustration and disappointment. Identify patterns of caring people, and limit your involvement (as much as possible) to only those who consistently show these patterns. Yes, you will be limiting your opportunities, but those opportunities remaining will be happier and more fulfilling.

[exitseven]

The world has limited resources and people have unlimited wants and needs. People are by nature selfish. Even Mother Teresa was selfish. It is just the way mankind evolved. You can decide to be a kind person and try to make friends and not be dishonest and make the world a better place but that is about all you can do.

[exitseven]

Thanks for the MHO

[TheSpaceGnome]

"I don't think many people would give me a kidney (for example) if I needed it"

So aside from your body just rejecting it, you asking for someone else's kidney makes you just as selfish as them wanting to keep their kidney's and stay healthy.

Asking another person to give you money that they worked to earn, is also selfish.

You need to look outside your own benefit to understand what is or isn't selfish.

Of you want generosity, you usually need to be generous. You are not the only person with needs and wants. People are not bad because they practice self care.

[TenderFantasy]

1. >So aside from your body just rejecting it, you asking for someone else's kidney makes you just as selfish as them wanting to keep their kidney's and stay healthy.< Thankfully I don't need it and mine are perfectly healthy but if you're interested in knowing I AM a donor. You can check my driver's license if you want. There are actually people WILLING to give one of their kidneys to people who need them. My aunt was a great example. You can LIVE with only one kidney.

2. >Asking another person to give you money that they worked to earn, is also selfish.< No I am not saying NOR am I demanding that. It is their own choice to give. I am not ROBBING them of their money. Some though, they have more than enough and then some. It would benefit them IN a selfish way, to give and to feel "good" and generous about it!

3. >You need to look outside your own benefit to understand what is or isn't selfish.< Maybe you could do the same. I think PLENTY of people could! If I can be honest.

4. >Of you want generosity, you usually need to be generous.< And I am and I have been. Did you even read in the past that I did a lot of things for my ex money wise, driving him to places wise and in the end he hurt me and just USED me? ? !

5. " You are not the only person with needs and wants." Duh! But it's like other people don't really care about it sadly. Maybe they care MORE about people they care about for some weird reason, that person passed the test of having them care about them!

6. >People are not bad because they practice self care.< No of course not. I never said that!

[TheSpaceGnome]

1. being a donor means that upon your death you consent to your organs being used, you cannot be selfish if you're already dead, so thats not reasonable allegory.

2. It's not about theft, its about double standards.

3. I don't expect generosity, I don't act entitled, I enjoy helping good people when I can (provided no detriment to me occurs), I am not critical of others for not giving, and I'm greatful when they do. So I already am looking outside my own benefit.

4. No, I didn't tead that, because you neglected to mention any of the things you did for others in your post. You just said you felt used.

5. Of course people care more about people they care about, thats self defining. You cannot expect anyone to shoulder the burdens of everyone else. No one is capable of that from a time, energy, resource, wealth, or any other perspective.

6. You implied it by calling people out for putting themselves as a priority, and then again for prioritizing loved ones.

[TheSpaceGnome]

read*

[TheSpaceGnome]

People should put themselves as a priority, because their happiness matters.

[TenderFantasy]

I never said that other people's happiness doesn't matter.

And for #1, I also said that people can live with only one kidney. I had a friend (still alive we're just not friends anymore) who only had one kidney and he was strong and healthy looking too. And finally, just because I'm dead doesn't mean my wishes can't be honored, wether that's deciding to donate or not. I was NOT a piece of meat that didn't have a soul! According to me and my family, we ALL have souls and I agree with that.

#2 ? Double standards? I'd give if I could, definitely. It would even be awesome to form my own foundation if I could. I've donated in the past even when I was financially struggling.

#3. Neither do I. I don't act entitled to anything either. None of the actions I do in real life reflect that. At least I don't think! I just want to survive and I believe many others do as well. But sometimes, (at least from what I've observed), that for some to survive, they have to take advantage of people and that's where I have a problem! But anyway...

4. Well, I am guessing you didn't remember some of the things that happened to me when I told about them in my past posts. That's okay.

5. Yeah that makes sense. If that part was misunderstood, then, opps, but I agree. Some don't have the time nor the reasources to.

6. Yeah unforutnately, that's in people's right to do that. I wasn't talking about prioritizing themselves... okay maybe I was... but then, maybe that is why world hunger will never be solved for example. There will always be people with way less and people with way more. I hope though that it balances out. I wonder what would happen if they or one of the people they cared about was affected? It doesn't usually affect them or their loved ones/relatives, that is why they don't have the burden to care. It's fine. Turning a blind eye (at least to the problems of others) do make people feel better a lot of times. It's okay. I'm not drowning thankfully.

[purplepoppy]

Because people have their own problems and quite often their burden is greater than yours. That's not to say they're not empathetic just they have to direct they're efforts towards themselves or close friends and family.
No matter how much your plight troubles me no amount of my concern will help you one bit.
People do care and will help out those in need but you have to give them a reason too.

[TenderFantasy]

>Because people have their own problems and quite often their burden is greater than yours.< Hmm, you cannot be sure of that, number one. But everything else you said mostly made sense so thanks. And no, if I see someone caring about me, and I can see that their efforts reflect that, I let them know that I appreciate it, either verbally or some other way.

[Hangry06]

Seriously you're basing this off on a person agreeing to undergo surgery and year open layers of their body wall...🙄

[Hangry06]

*tear

[TenderFantasy]

What are you talking about and why do you have an ugly attitude against me? ! Immature much! ! I didn't DO anything bad to you and that wasn't the only thing I was complaining about geez!

[HippieVeganJewslim]

No-one seems to give a shit about my Flower Girl or Noura, so I definitely care about them, but then again, it can be hard to care about many people. I’ve heard that he who is friends with everybody is friends with nobody. Not like I agree, though.

[NathanDavis]

that's what some truly selfish people do... but is not everyone though, that's a good thing

[LegendaryDater]

If there is no face then it's easy to hate.

[TenderFantasy]

Well, I wasn't really just referring to online, but offline as well.

[Kaneki05]

Humans are selfish by nature.

[TenderFantasy]

But being selfish can also HURT other people, even yourself.

[Sevenpointfive]

i care. but i'm not a bleeding heart