I have accidentally killed one of our kittens, how can I ever forgive myself? (Page 2)

Jemini_Crocket · 2023-08-06T17:11:49Z

I've never before thought of this being possible or for it to happen to me, I absolutely love our pets and would never hurt them. I have never stepped on any cat except maybe their tail. This unfortunate accident happened when I was carrying garbage out to the bin and after walking through the main door there are two steps. I was walking normally, stepping down from the last step and in that moment I've stepped onto the kitten's neck breaking it in the process (he was just trying to hunt me down playfully I assume), I really didn't see him or hear him. He started to trash around for few seconds, I cried out for my mom to go help me, but we couldn't do anything to help him. I've apologized to my mom so many times, I really feel so sorry for him, he was a lovely kitten, the best one out of the batch... My mom says it's going to get better over time but I can't imagine ever forgiving myself for this mistake of mine. I don't think it could ever happen to anyone else but me. I'm crying again atm, I have been since yesterday, it happened yesterday on 6:50pm. My eyes hurt so much, so puffy and red... and the terrible feeling of guilt is unbearable, though I know I deserve all of it. Has something similar happened to anyone of you as well? How to forgive myself? I feel like such a piece of crap. I wish I could go just few seconds back and save the kitten. I loved the little guy. Now there are two sisters of his left and I don't trust myself with animals anymore (can't imagine ever having a baby, it's an absolute NO for me).