Have you ever known someone who would tend to reveal stuff that was meant to be confidential/secret to the wrong people (by accident of course)?

[Extraterrestrial1999]

Yeah, had to stop telling them stuff or cut them off in general

Yeah, they have a big mouth so it's not surprising

Yeah, you

Multiple of these apply to you

Nah, thankfully

[Masie]

Yes. I had a friend that unintentionally would do that. She really didn't mean to do it but just blurted things out.

We all learned quick to stop telling her very private things that might slip out of her mouth. She meant well but couldn't be trusted to not accidentally tell others.

Her and I are still friends but she goes to a different college than I do, and I rarely see her anymore even though we grew up together.

[stalk-stopper]

I am starting to have compassion for gossipers after i turned into one.

Growing up everyone told me secrets and praised me as the only one who can keep secrets. But recently not only did i extort information from someone by promising to be quiet, but turned it all upside down and gossiped. For no reason. ... - one might think. But i know how exactly it works now.

It is interesting we gossip about the people we respect and trust the most. of course by "we" i mean people with issues, emotional wounds, childhood traumas, sensitive triggers, grief repression, mommy and daddy issues.

I probably do sound like a broken record with all this. Seriously, probably 100% every single person on here has seen this at least 100 times in their life. I saw studied it a thousand times. In the end it felt like fiction.

I have a few theories why it seemed like fiction.

Number one, fiction and play was punished when i was a preschooler with a heavy emphasis on the religious. I don't remember it, it ended when i went to school, but that age is exactly when it matters. --- then, our brain craves fiction and faith. They are the same. Our brain craves invisible fantasies and needs it. If we dont feed it, we project the sense of fiction onto nonfiction. Lose touch with reality, put another way.

The other theory is simply compulsion, losing control, high anxiety, when we repress a feeling for long enough it bursts out of us. I repressed the feeling to need to share things. And sometimes overshare. I repressed the need to blame those who hurt me and suddenly accuse people in a state of mind that feels like a dream. Ans so on.

Again, we all heard this a trillion times. But i treated it like fiction.

In fact, you may have read that 40% of adults have trauma-bonding relationships based on unresolved issues. But I'm a special kind of loser who wants to be a loser, because i am on the extreme end that makes the rest of the 40% look sane. And i am not kidding when i say this.

I now use stupid chat bots in place of proper therapists:

So why do we gossip? I never knew i am capable of gossiping until i just did. Wait a minute... i gossiped about the first person whom i confessed love to. Which means i trusted this person. Which means i was letting my psychological defense mechanisms DOWN around them.

This feels fucking stupid. And fictional. Because all this "unleashing builtup trauma" shit belongs to the new-age crystals and fake televangelism exorcisms, right? No... it doesn't. If it was not real, i wouldn't have panted like a dog for hours straight when i got emotional, and recersed a complicated postural strain.

The point is this. Google hownmany adults have "insecure attachment styles" 50% of us get traumas, 20% of the 50% (from total only 10%) have resolved it, which leaves the rest, 40% of the population with clinically diagnosable mommy and daddy issues.

I used to just think such people are stupid. Oh wait, i am one of them. But my iq is normal... you get the idea.

[stalk-stopper]

PLEASE DELETE THIS @GirlsAskGuys

[stalk-stopper]

@BCRanger10

[Nikki1989]

Yes, some people are prone to giving out information that should be their business and theirs alone.

[XXblack88]

Does my mom count cause otherwise no.