Have you ever shared a secret with someone you truly trusted but then later found out they betrayed you?

[laurieluvsit]

I am one that can keep secrets, when it truly is a secret.

Like some secrets really aren't that secret and that word is just thrown around rather loosely.

But then there are the times when you can't believe what you are hearing and you sit there frozen listening with your mouth open, thinking..."Wow, this really is a secret that I would never want anyone to know, and I will never betray my friend and let this out to anyone, ever, without their permission!"

Have you ever had one of those "real secrets" get out from someone you believed would never do that to you and had your heart broken, or worse?

What did you do, or how did you feel about it?

Please share your heart with us, but no, not your secrets... lol

A. OMG! YES! My heart was crushed when it happened and it was hard to ever forgive them!

B. No, I have never had that happen, but I could imagine how much pain that could cause someone

C. OTHER, see my comments below, or just open the survey

[DanishSaint]

I have, yes.
The consequences it had for me, when this delicate matter was revealed to the very wrong persons was immense - like really monumental. I lost my girlfriend, my house, some friends and eventually went bankrupt with my business transforming into a substantial financial loss. So it was pretty rough, but the worst part - without a doubt- was the feeling of the betrayal brought on my one of 3 people in the world I had allowed myself to actually trust with my life. I´ll never forget how it wrecked me inside, how hard it was having to face reality and tell myself that he actually did that to me. It almost drove me mad for a couple of years, actually leaving me in such a dark place, that I had to reconsider most of my life entirely in order to get past it, refusing to let it destroy my life even more, but accept it as something I could not change but needed to let go before it would have destroyed me completely. Yeah... shattered trust is a bitch!

[laurieluvsit]

That is so sad, I am glad some time has gone by and you have been able to recover to a point.

[Nik1hil]

This même..
Took me less than 5 seconds to get it 🤣😂🤣😂

[laurieluvsit]

The funniest jokes are the ones that have some truth to them... lol

[Nik1hil]

Exactly!.. V

[Jaye234]

Yes, I told a girl who I thought was my bestfriend a secret and the next day the entire school knew. She tried to lie and tell me she didn't tell anyone. Naturally it was a secret that I didn't want anyone to know about but I thought I could trust her.
I beat her ass for telling and haven't spoken to her since.

[jennifer_bloom]

I voted no - its never happened before - but I am an extremely good judge of character. I think my 33 years - I've only had one person defy my expectations.

[Billie_]

Yeah. When I was 15 one of my friends told my crush I liked him. Boo you whore!

[laurieluvsit]

That is not right unless you planned it that way.

I had 2 different girlfriends that asked me to tell their crush's that they liked them because they were too shy to do it. That made the boys want to flirt with them, so in that case it worked out well. But when you want it to be kept secret then they are definable wrong to do it.
Maybe they did it innocently though just wanting to play cupid :)

[laurieluvsit]

Hi Ms Billie,

You just gave me the idea for this post...

Have you ever tried to play cupid with a girlfriend, or guy friend, and get them matched up with someone you thought they might really like? ↗

I wanted to give you credit for it, but not without your permission, so I didn't, but thank you so much for the inspiration :)

[Billie_]

Lmao cool!

[DizzyDesii]

Yep and little do they know i know... yet they wanna be all friendly on GAG

[laurieluvsit]

... that is sad :(

[JosyJosy]

Yes, but it's always been a 'little' secret, to test the person

[laurieluvsit]

You are so crafty :) ... lol

[OlderAndWiser]

I recently was scheduled for a surgical repair of an inguinal hernia. It is a routine procedure, minimally invasive, go home the same day. I did not want my family to know because my mother is 88 years old, in poor health, and her husband in poor health. I did not want to have her concerned about nothing.

I told my sister about the procedure just in case something did not happen as anticipated. I specifically asked her to not tell our mother and she agreed she would not.

The day after the surgery, she told my mother. The time of the conversation was that I had withheld information from my mother and my sister was "setting things right" by revealing this to her.

My response: I immediately cut off my sister from receiving any more information from me.

Now, the most amazing part:. About 5 days ago, my sister confided that she was undergoing some medical tests for a suspicion of Parkinson's Disease and she asked me to not tell our mother!

[normalice]

I guess I'm a little odd in that I just assume everything I'm told is a secret. And thus, I used to assume that everyone else assumed the same thing. I invited a friend over who I'd met that day, when I was 14 or something like that, and confided in him that my older brother was a "dope," whatever that means (I meant just 'idiot'). He walked strait to my older brother and asked him, directly, "is it true that you're a dope?" I was both fascinated my how stupid someone my own age could be, and horrified for the more obvious reasons.

[abc3643]

It's THE #1 reason why many middle-aged and older adult men choose to never get into relationships with women again.

[laurieluvsit]

You mean like when the relationship sours, then she will start telling everyone personal things that she shouldn't be?

[abc3643]

Not necessarily.

This is all very sexist, but 4 billion years of evolution is a bit stronger than social justice. In a nutshell, the biggest difference between men and women, besides genitalia, is how we communicate: what we say, when we say it, how we say it, and when to keep our mouths shut.

On evolutionary grounds, we are rather quiet and do not communicate much and there are two reasons for that:.
1. Males left females and children to go out and kill dinner or predators. If you make noise, predators flee. If you make noise, predators detect and kill you. So, males keep quiet.
2. Males know that information = power and information that others have about you = power they have over you. Because of the evolved competitive nature of men, we don't reveal information about ourselves.

For females, it's the other way around. They need to share information to cooperate and teach the next generation. It's one way they protect each other - especially from errant males who might become dangerous.

OK, meanwhile, males love to fuck. Again, evolution: Fuck early, fuck often, fuck as many different females as you can. (This maximizes genetic diversity which is good for the species.) However, love also evolved because that keeps males and females bound to each other for better chance of survival for the kids.

One more thing: Males view everything as a threat. That is very stressful and one reason why we die earlier than females. However, we need a release from the stress of that. Sex is one way, but we need a mental and emotional release. So, a man needs to completely trust his woman and believe that she is loyal. It's that information thing - we are giving her information about us. We DON'T want her communicating that information to ANYONE else.

Unfortunately, young men fall in love easier and are more trusting and they are not attuned to the nature of women as chatterboxes with each other. Older men know this. If they got burned once, they then say "Never again."

[laurieluvsit]

That is most interesting Mr A3. Well written and easy to understand. I like it :)

[Gedaria]

Yes been there, I told a g\f how I felt about my gender. She blabbed to some friends of mine. But to my surprise one of them, came for a chat and said I wondered why you were different , I like it. We became close friends , it was great to be open about it...

[tonicandgin]

I dont share secrets, they are meant to go to the grave or told to people that know nothing about you in real life or identity. but i can understand the betrayal of trust

[GraveDoll]

No.

I have never trusted anyone deep enough to do so. Not even my sisters.

In my mind it like giving someone a weak spot to hit you with if they decide they hate you or something.

[hellionthesagereborn]

I don't tell other peoples secrets, as for my own, either no one knows or every one does because once you say it, its inevitable that it will get out so you better be prepared for that.

[loveslongnails]

In the immortal words of Benjamin Franklin:
"Three can keep a secret if two are dead".
Trust NO ONE !!

[laurieluvsit]

Yes, the ultimate truth :)

[loveslongnails]

Except me, Laurie. :) I'm a vault. LOL

[Finchie40]

Yes , i was betrayed a few times and just made me realize those friends werent really friends so Now adays i mainly keep to myself and come on here and ask you guys for advice lol

[Jones_T]

I am not secret revealed... And keep things only in my heart. Sometimes I trust people very quickly but anyone my friends reveal those things...
But the wrongs they talk a lot of times talk open.. fb comments and post... Little yes...

But secrets only with my friends' heart

[TheSoundOfSilas]

I have been betrayed in this way, but I can't say it felt like my heart got crushed.
Can't be disappointed if you expect nothing from them in the first place.

[JayParris]

I always test before giving any real info. I'll tell them something small, that I don't care about and I've never told anyone else (sometimes an outright lie), and see if it comes back around

[modeve]

I have experienced it. Now I don't trust such persons and keep secrets to myself.

[Jjpayne]

Unfortunately, keeping secrets is not easy for me :( I just avoid secrets whenever I can :)

[blondfrog]

Yes and that's how I've gotten good at keeping my mouth shut. I learned the hard way, but in the end the most important thing is that I learned. DTA (don't trust anyone:) lol

[yucel_eden]

Small level secrets or information yes I let out and I was hurt to hear it back.

But big level secrets I don’t let out. Never have. Only person that knows is my therapist and I trust her.

[JohnAlaska43]

I never tell secrets. Im a loyal. friend.
Yesmany have brome my trust.

[JohnAlaska43]

yes many broke my trust

[Vitrius]

I confided in a workmate that a female colleague had kissed me at a Christmas party. He then went and talked to her about it. It caused her to a row with me and although she and I healed our differences I didn't trust him with any details ever again.

[humanearth]

Yes and they used it against me to get a promotion a year later

[pizzalovershouse]

yes but I only told them a friends secret that wasn't mine sept the 1s every 1 saw in public happen to me