Best Traits Of A Girlfriend

[Anonymous]

Short note before you begin: This myTake was written from the perspective of what a guy could look for in a girlfriend, a lot of these points could very well apply TO BOTH GENDERS but for the sake of time we'll focus on the girlfriend. So, let's take a look at some of the valuable traits "most" guys look for in a lasting relationship.

1. She's Independent

This should be a given although a relationship is about two people no one gets into a relationship to be fully responsible for a new life. If she's had a rough day, it's great to be able to comfort her, but if she can't seem to function without you, that's a bad sign and you'll eventually feel trapped.

Independence is key to a happy relationship, for both the man and the woman. If she maintains a life outside of the relationship from hobbies to new adventures, you'll find you're still learning new things about her years later.

2. She's Intelligent

If you haven't figured it out by now, the dumb girl act gets boring really fast as it doesn't provide a challenge for anyone. A woman who can challenge and meet your intellectual level is always a turn on and will constantly keep you interested.

3. She's Sexual

Whether you wish you admit it or not, a great girlfriend has to be sexually compatible with you. For instance, if you're into kinkier things like BDSM and she's more into the "vanilla" lifestyle, that's a problem. The two of you have to be on the same page, in terms of sexual dominance, open-mindedness, sexual drive and many more...

THIS DOES NOT MEAN that she has to be experienced or rush into sex before she's ready, it simply means that you and her have great sexual attraction toward each other and are able to communicate your desires verbally (or physically).

4. Mutual Physical Attraction

A bit obvious but something that I thought needed to be said. A great girlfriend will not only want to look good for you but also for herself. It's only natural that we want to look our best for those we love.

Your mutual attraction should make you both want to stay looking your best. Being in a relationship isn't a good excuse to just stop caring for yourself in things like fitness, clothing or just overall hygiene.

5. She Respects You

Probably one of the biggest points so far, your girlfriend must respect you(and vice versa), otherwise you have to wonder why she's even with you at this point. This means that she takes the time to listen to you, even if you're in a fight.

She'll make an effort to see things from your point of view. The key here is that the respect be mutual.

6. She Lets You Be A Man

Do not get involved with a woman who tries to change you to fit her idea of perfection. This will only lead to a bunch of resentment down the road and will most likely end in a breakup. A good girlfriend lets you be the man you aspire to be, not the man she read about in fairy tales.

7. She doesn't start arguments without a good reason.

A great girlfriend knows this and chooses her battles wisely. She knows when to get upset and when to let it slide.

However, that's not an excuse for guys to do stupid things. If you live together with your girlfriend and you went out all night, never even bothered calling her then you're basically asking for it. This is a situation that nobody would let slide not even the best girlfriend.

8. She Gets Along With Your Friends And Family

A good girlfriend doesn't "have to" like/love your friends and family, what's important is the effort she puts in to get to know them and try to maintain a friendly relationship. From helping your mom out with dinner to going along with your friends' really bad jokes, it's all part of showing she cares.

In the end, when you tell your friends your girlfriend will be joining you to whatever activity was planned, they'll actually be happy because she's practically a part of the group now.

9. She Loves You

If you have found a woman who loves you for who you really are and not who you pretend or try to be sometimes, you should definitely hang on to her. No one is perfect and the more you get to know each other, you'll start finding little pet peeves, but you'll accept them anyway because you love each other that much.

10. She Makes You Want To Be a Better Man

A bit cliché, yeah I know, but ask any guy who's with an amazing girlfriend and he'll tell you that she makes him want to be better, not just for her but himself as well. She won't have to say anything to make you feel this way, you'll just genuinely want to. Whether it's showing her, you care about the little things like remembering anniversaries, to aiming higher in the job field or being a great father for your future children...you'll notice it.

Part 2: Best Traits of a Boyfriend

[checkyesjulietx]

I was looking for something to disagree with but nothing came to me. Comprehensive list. Nothing to add. And like you said, can apply to both genders.

[Xelebrum]

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You are a beautiful man for writing this, bravo!

[myTake Owner]

Thank you sir! lol

[far2gud4u]

I agree partially...

Its a great take, dont get me wrong but there is a but,,,

BUT: number 1 is ok until you have kids then you dont get the time alone and all of a sudden you feel more trapped. You need to know you can be with your girl constantly and not ddrive you crazy because there will be times ahead for you that its gonna happen. I am not saying constantly, but occasionally you need to spend a lot of time together just to know you can. This doesn't include holidays etc as you are not living in normalcy. I am saying take some time and live your day to day lives together. Who knows what the future will hold?

Number 3 shouldn't be shrugged off lightly, odds are a vanilla person doesn't know what else there is to do...

Number 4: I think you need to still be attracted to your girl when she doesn't look her best, partly for the same reasons as number 1. There will be some points in her life when she hasn't the time or energy to look great for you.

Number 6: Its not about being a man its about being yourself and wholeheartedly agree. ALTHOUGH I usually try to make my boyfriends a little more considerate as I hate selfish behavior. This I dont think is a change to them but a slight improvement which helps our relationship :)

Finally its nice to know number 8 is noticed. My bf's mother hates me and yet I still make an effort for him and its nice to know a guy sees it :) x

Great take, now I look forward to your 'how to be an amazing BF' post :) xx

[myTake Owner]

Yeah you make some good points, most of it really came down to my wording and exceptions that I didn't think needed to be written down.

In number 1, I thought it was obvious kids would be more of an exception.. I mean you can't be annoyed with your baby lol. As far as spending time together, if you're don't want to spend a lot of time with your gf/bf then why even get in a relationship. That point was for the people who can't function without being with their partner. They "NEED" to be together at all times.

Number 3, I emphasized communication and being willing to work with inexperience. Overall, what you'd need is a partner who's open minded to trying new things.

Number 4, Yeah of course there are plenty of times where looking our best simply isn't the most important thing, I doubt anyone is that superficial that they'd get mad because their girlfriend is in sweats and gained a bit of weight lol. That was more for people who seem to give up "completely" once they're in a relationship.

[myTake Owner]

Number 6, don't think I need to really go in depth for this the "being a man" was just wording choice. The point was not trying to shape him into your idea of perfection.

Number 8, yeah it's nice seeing how hard how partner is trying for us... really lets us know they care :)

And finally, thanks for reading it all :) yeah I'm almost done with the boyfriend post :D

[far2gud4u]

lol i knew it would be coming ;)

[myTake Owner]

I couldn't disappoint my number 1 fan ;)

[Mesonfielde]

I agree with all of this, which is great. Although I would have preferred #6 to say "She doesn't want to fundamentally change who you are" instead of "lets you be a man", considering you are a human adult male no matter what she does.

And yes, 3 and 4) is also necessary. If you reject your partner physically on a regular basis, that relationship will eventually be doomed to failure. And no, this is not just "male entitlement". The fact that a girl like that wouldn't want to connect with their partner is in itself a red flag.

[myTake Owner]

Agreed.

[AsianFlower]

WOW. Great post! It makes my heart sing :) Every good guy deserves a woman like that. If we all just treated each other with love and respect, if we sought to GIVE value to others rather than take it, the world would be a better, happier place. Thanks for sharing.

[myTake Owner]

Lol let it keep singing, thanks! :)

[LightsOff]

Hopefully when I get in a relationship, I will fulfill all of those things. Nobody is perfect but I will do my best. :) Very reasonable points, nothing here that I disagree with. Those things are also things I seek in my future boyfriend.

[myTake Owner]

At the end of the day, it's really just about the effort both of you make to be happy together! Glad you enjoyed it :)

[ambertaylor]

Agree 100%. Nothing to add. Great article.
Girls take note!

[myTake Owner]

Thanks! :)

[Sarahnade]

Awwww this is a stunning myTake why did you have to go anon? I'd like to read any takes you did previously, and if you haven't found your right one yet, may you get a girl that fits all (or at least almost all) of the above! ;)

[myTake Owner]

Lol all my myTakes are anon :P
Yeah I have someone special in my life :) Thanks for reading!

[Sara413]

Very good take and I agree 100%. As you said, this is true the other way around s well and in same sex relationships.

I've heard over and over again that relationships are a power struggle and I just don't buy it. Some might be - most even - but that's not healthy and that's not how they SHOULD be. To me, it's about mutual respect, love and dedication between two equal partners. I wouldn't be caught dead in a relationship that's anything less! Thankfully the boyfriend agrees.

[Nik1hil]

Poor fella, gone anonymous. Yeah, efforts should be placed on the above points, but if things don't work out, does not me she is not good, all boys need is she now and then gives efforts in it does not matters if it's a success or failure.

[myTake Owner]

Lol I hide in the shadows :P
Yeah she doesn't need to meet all those points, the effort is the biggest component.

[Annetted98]

Very good written :).

But what if I'm scared of relationships nowadays because almost 80% guys are having those 'side chics'? But same with girls though, instead of working on the relationship everyone get some side fuck instead. That's insane..

[myTake Owner]

Thanks!

Also your problem seems to be more along trust issues because it's nowhere near "80% of guys" that cheat.
If your relationship is going to last, you have to trust and know that you're the only one in his life. Going in with the mentality that he's with someone else, is just your insecurities playing out and will drive him away really fast.

[Annetted98]

Well in my town it's very common.
My close friend has been dating this guy for almost 2 and half year, she'd never thought that he cheated on her three times. Four guys with girlfriends wrote another girl I know so awful stuff AND THEY HAVE GIRLFRIENDS.
My mum was telling me stuff about one guy how sweet he is to his girlfriend how he always calls her mum if she needs something from the store etc but he was writing another girl through a fcking e mail cause his girlfriend had his fb password.
Even my parents got divorce bc my dad was cheating.
This is why I'm little scared. Sure I won't be the jealous type but... I know so many guys that are sexting other girls while claiming "they love thrir girlfriends".
But same with girls, like I said before. It's sick...

[myTake Owner]

Yeah like I said, you have trust issues based on what you grew up with, but your town is still a minute representation of the real world. You can't go in a new relationship expecting every guy to be like your dad for example.

Go to college somewhere new, and make your own life experiences. Don't let other people's lives affect your own to such extent.

[Annetted98]

Yeah I guess you're right.

But I mean what would you expect when stuff like these are basically my whole surrounding plus every vine ever is based on "when your side chick text u and you're w your main chick" or whatever.

I don't blame guys, and I'm not saying every boy do this, I'm just saying I'm little insecure :/

[weegin]

Well, I say better to trust them and be wrong than to not trust them and be wrong. That's the approach I'd take, at least.

Then again, I'm extremely single.

[HandsomeRaj]

I seriously wish you weren't anon while submitting this My Take :)

Very beautifully written, good content and emphasis (y)

'She's not insecure' is another valid and important point :) :D

[myTake Owner]

Thanks! :)

I considered a point on insecurity, but the thing is everyone at one point or another is going to be insecure about something, seems unrealistic to add it as a trait for being a good girlfriend.

[HandsomeRaj]

Thank you for the up vote and comment young friend :)

I'm no girl but I know for sure that I don't get insecure. It's a choice one can make based on their own ability and willingness to do so :)

If a girl tries to make me insecure, she'll find me indifferent but I'll vocalize it; persistent tries at doing it and I'm history :)

[mskay]

Well written! One of the best I've read so far. No doubt it can be applied to both gender as well. (:

[myTake Owner]

Thanks! :)

[Ensiferum]

stopped reading after the first point.

I disagree.

I prefer way more a dependant girl (do not mistake with submissive).

Independant is a huge turn off for me.

I dont want her to be crazily jealous etc... but i wanna feel so important for her, almost essential. Independant just make me feel not important enough.

Thats why I love soo much my girlfriend, she's dependant, and a bit jealous.

[myTake Owner]

Clearly our definition on independence vary.
Having an independent girlfriend doesn't mean she doesn't demonstrate how important you are to her... she can also be jealous if the occasion requires it. She can depend on you for a lot of things.

It just means that she doesn't define her happiness based on how often she's with you and like I highlighted on that point, it's about whether or not " she can function without you".

[thereshegoes1]

This take is generally spoken. Of course there will always be exceptions. :)

[MysteriousFlower]

It almost feel 6 and 10 contradicts each other. Besides that nitpick this was a nice take.

[myTake Owner]

Not really, I said in 10, "She won't have to say anything to make you feel this way, you'll just genuinely want to"
So she's not changing him, he just wants to be better for "himself".

But other than that, thanks :)

[Mesonfielde]

10 means that they inspire you to do 6

[admles]

This is the probably the first truly accurate take on what makes a girlfriend I have seen on this site.

Well done!

[myTake Owner]

Means a lot! Thanks :)

[PiuBelloAmante]

Ladies I am single
If you are anything like what was listed above please pm me 😉

On a serious note this take was great and well written bravo!!!

[myTake Owner]

Oh man, your inbox will be full soon! You know how women are always looking for boyfriends on GaG haha
Thanks bro! :)

[PiuBelloAmante]

Yeah this is actually the best mytake I have read in recent memory

Hopefully girls will take note of all these traits!

[mooky06]

I liked your mytake. I really liked it. Well done ☺️

[myTake Owner]

Thanks! :)

[YourFutureEx]

Nataly Osmann brought me to this take <3 😍

I don't think any person could disagree with this :)

[myTake Owner]

Haha thanks! :)

[loved2blovedbyu]

Well written... and you are 100% correct on everything I read in the above. GREAT Post

[myTake Owner]

Thanks! Means a lot :)

[CityBoy773]

Actually decent Take from an Anon guy. I'm impressed.

[myTake Owner]

Lol thanks, did you expect my points to be stereotypical or something :P

[CityBoy773]

I expected a stupidTake. But yours is well informed and actually good.

[Sara413]

Hahaha right? Totally clicked on it for a hate-read and ended up agreeing with every point lol

[TrainwreckAdvice]

Very great post!!! Good job, It would be a great feeling to have that one day.

[myTake Owner]

Thanks! :)