Why you (probably) shouldn't get involved with your partners hobbies

[Anonymous]

So, some of the common things I see ripping apart relationships is infidelity and common interests. So today we are covering the topic of: Why you probably shouldn't get involved with your partners hobbies!

First we will cover most common hobbies of each gender!

DISCLAIMER: I obviously can't speak for everyone so if I come off as biased I apologize!

First Men!

1: Gaming mostly Online Gaming!

Online Gaming is most common because it's a good outlet for stress and anger. It's also an escape from reality.

2: Drinking with the guys!

This is a good way for men to complain about their significant others and generally be an idiot.

3: Driving/Running!

Another great outlet for stress. If he's stressed I suggest leaving him be on this one. If he's doing just for the sake of doing go ahead and join in. Just make sure you ask first!

Now women!

1: Drinking or going out for a "Girls Night"!

This is easily comparable to men going out "With The Guys" just basically copy and paste that explanation here!

2: Watching TV or playing on their phone!

This isn't really a "Hobby" per say but is the most common thing women do to de-stress while their man is out or playing a game. Men can usually join in on this. If they seem stressed just leave them be.

3: Baking/Cooking/Making comfort food!

This seems a little sexist I know, but it is something that can be a stress reliever for both genders but women use it the most commonly between the two genders. Personally, I can't cook anything but pancakes and grilled cheese. If not for my partner I'd probably eat nothing but pizza and chicken wings! XD

So with that out of the way, why shouldn't you join in on your others hobbies? Well this is something that has been on countless TV shows including: American Dad, Family Guy, Everybody Loves Raymond, and Friends. So imagine your man is out drinking with the guys and you join in. Likely he is going to be protecting you from drunk men, trying to spare your feeling by not complaining about you, or not drinking as much so you don't get mad at him. Now imagine your woman is cooking and you keep asking "Why are you doing that?" or "We can just order in..." likely all you're going to accomplish is sleeping on the couch.

If you want to avoid these marital problems just give each other some space. If they ask you to join in? Do it! If not? Let them have their own time. If you smother them they will likely grow to resent you. If you make yourself prominent in every aspect of their life they will become irritated with your constant presence and break under the pressure of trying to keep you happy 100% of the time.

Just give each other some space and you will be fine!

Hey! Thanks for reading! Have an opinion or another example of a hobby? Leave it below! Have a favourite thing I said in this? Leave it below! Have a favourite hobby of the above listed? I would love to hear it (or rather read it :D) and get a better idea of both sides of the argument!

Thanks again for reading! Sorry for my spelling Boo Boos! Have a good day everyone!

[TechieMatera]

Like ImSoSozzled said, I disagree as well. While I do believe it's perfectly fine to respect your partner's space if they're wanting to go out and hang out with their friends to just alleviate some tension, it's quite fun sharing mutual hobbies and interests with your partner. My boyfriend loves video games and I've always enjoyed games, so we can both play together and let off steam together. But we can both play separately if we need to have some time to ourselves.

I'm also the complete opposite of your typical gender stereotypes. I'm a production engineer (audio and lighting equipment maintenance and operations), I'm skilled in carpentry and welding, among other typical "masculine" things. My boyfriend is a chef, so he's the one who turns to the kitchen for some relaxation. But he's always excited to teach me how to cook, which I'm horrible at, but I enjoy the time spent learning how to cook with him. I think you can share many hobbies without growing to resent each other. It's just when you start trying to dictate someone's life that you begin to grow resentment.

[myTake Owner]

See this is why I said specifically "I can't speak for everyone"

[ImSoSozzled]

I 100% disagree. I love it when girls show interest in my hobbies (especially video games), and doing stuff together like cooking and running can be tons of fun. Obviously relationships need space and always tagging along on your significant other's girls/boys night out is probably not a great idea unless you are invited, but I don't think we should dissuade people from trying to take up their partner's hobbies.

[TechieMatera]

My take exactly.

[myTake Owner]

I never said don't try to join in. The point that I was trying to get across was not to smother them. They're activities outside of the home are their own. That's all I am trying to say.

[ImSoSozzled]

Well, in my opinion, that comes across as contrary to what you wrote (with the exception of a couple of sentences near the end), especially the title of the take and the very first sentence. If you had centered the whole take around the idea of giving your partner space I would agree with you more (and maybe that was your intention), but the way you wrote it just makes it sound like having too many common interests would doom any relationship.

[myTake Owner]

Largely if you read from a different stance the title says maybe you shouldn't get involved. Largely the point of it was "Joining in on your partners hobbies is fine. Don't smother them and don't force yourself to be interested in what they're interested in"

[stegocanop]

I get what you're trying to say here, that some people use their hobbies to release some stress and you should leave them to it, I think you just chose examples and the wording poorly. I don't know a single guy or a girl who would be upset with his girlfriend or boyfriend trying to game or cook something with them. (Speaking of which, I'm also not a fan of how you stereotyped hobbies into gender groups, my boyfriend for one is great at cooking and baking while I suck at it, and I spend much more time gaming than he does. It's 2015, time to stop generalising) I would actually view it as a sign of disrespect and lack of affection if someone didn't even try to take interest in something their partner likes. This take could be more appropriate if it was focusing on giving people space rather than on hobbies.

[stegocanop]

with their girlfriend or boyfriend*

[myTake Owner]

I wasn't stereotyping. I was stating the most common among gender groups. If I cam off as stereotypical I apologize.

[myTake Owner]

And the point of the take was to say "Back off. You don't need to be dominant in every aspect of your partners life" I have addressed this in the take. Perhaps you should try to comprehend it when you aren't tunnel visioned?

[GirlScout]

Wow, what a load of sexist shit! Like... wow! My man is too concerned about protecting me from other men? Are we living in a cave too?

I think your title should have been more along the lines of Why it's important to have your own hobbies in relationships.

Sharing interests is actually a good thing, as is doing things together. It helps strengthen your bond together. Invading every aspect of your partners life is not.

[myTake Owner]

That last sentence was the point. I wasn't being sexist. Don't be attacking me. I was simply stating common hobbies based on statistics. Not based on sexism. If you care to read the cooking one again I address exactly what you're complaining about.

[GirlScout]

It's sexist, your words portray someone who has a certain way of looking at things at it seems very sexist.

[myTake Owner]

Seems. Notice your choice in words there?

[GirlScout]

Yes, that is why I wrote the word, because I know what it means. I'm telling you that this post comes across as incredibly sexist.

[Fattuesdayz]

I think different interests are good but it's okay if they're the same. Here's the problem. If the girl is not genuinely interested in her boyfriend's hobby and only participates in it to win him over, that is wrong. If she really likes it, so be it. Or vice versa.
I like to fish and have gone fishing with plenty of guys I dated. I don't hunt but I would go with my ex boyfriend on trips. I think it's good to learn and understand each other's interest and why they like it.
Gender roles are where things get confusing. "Women cook". "Men play videogames". Okay, hobbies can be enjoyed by both sexes. You were absolutely sexist by grouping those interests and stereotyping both men and women.

[myTake Owner]

Ok not once did I say women cook and men game. I was taking a statistical stance not a sexist one. Statistically speaking, Women spend more time in the kitchen and Men spend more time on the couch. That's just statistics. If you want to come to me and call me sexist when I very much believe in gender neutrality you need to re asses what you've read. Don't take offence to it. If I was being sexist I would say "Make your man food while he plays video games and gets drunk" that would be me being sexist. I was not being sexist. I was simply stating most common hobbies through a statistical microscope. Picking apart people's emotions and knowing stereotypes is my job. I never said once that these hobbies are restricted to only those genders. Seems as though mostly women take offence to this and take it out of context. Most of the guys see what I'm trying to say and don't dissect the take. I wonder why that is? (I'm being sarcastic I know exactly why that is)

[myTake Owner]

And perhaps you didn't read this.

Baking/Cooking/Making comfort food!

This seems a little sexist I know, but it is something that can be a stress reliever for both genders but women use it the most commonly between the two genders. Personally, I can't cook anything but pancakes and grilled cheese. If not for my partner I'd probably eat nothing but pizza and chicken wings! XD

[mr90skid]

Yo I never thought about it like that :I it would suck having to hide or take part in my hobbies in private without her knowing cause she couldn't accept the fact that I wanna go onedeep sometimes. It's all good if she can give some space though
Dope take man

[Anonymous]

I agree with everything except the gaming. My boyfriend and I game together all the time and that has become quite like "bonding time" for us. But other than that, yes. I agree.

[Outofthegrey]

As an archer who has beaten the Olympic qualifier scores in barebow archery I have to say one thing.

1.) I want a girl to do archery with me.

[John_Doesnt]

Yeah, that's all women do is bake, go drinking for a girls night out and play with their phone.

[myTake Owner]

That's not what I'm saying.

[Nicolás25]

This is pretty good give eachother space to grow and destress

[pavlove]

Lol a little sexist?

[myTake Owner]

Not at all. Read through it again my friend. It's not at all sexist. Make sure you read all of it slowly if it's coming off as sexist. I'm simply naming the most common hobbies of each gender. I didn't say those are exclusive to those genders nor did I say those are the only hobbies those genders have.