You read that title and clicked it straight thinking "Yeah! Here's the spice😜" We like to know about the love lives of others, don't we? So let's start curious beings lol -
I met my first crush or what you can say the first girl I was attracted to five years ago. We were in the same class. She was quite outgoing and I was really shy- so shy that I didn't use to talk to a girl even if she started the convo. I didn't even know the names of girls in my class (yeah I was soo absent-minded when it came to girls). It was our unit tests-used to be a one hour test of each subject and normal classes after that. During unit tests, we used to sit according to our roll numbers for test and the regular classes. She had to sit next to me.
The first day, I saw her from close, BAM! She was cute af🙈 She was cute and short haha. *sighs* She was dominant though. I still remember that she wanted something from me but I refused and she snatched my pen and said that she wouldn't give it until I'd agree to her. That day, I lost the argument as well as my heart. Didn't even know what the crush meant at that time. I just used to admire her. Unfortunately, After the first day, the seating arrangement was changed and we were allowed to sit anywhere after the tests. So, from next day, we started sitting with our besties. I tried hard to talk to her but couldn't gather enough courage. I could just watch her secretely, nothing more. I was just 10 or 11 then.
After 2-3 years, we were again in the same section but I still couldn't approach her and controlled my emotions. I had accepted till then that I had no chance and it wasn't of any use.
Meanwhile in these gap of 2-3 years, I saw another girl. She was average looking. I only knew her name, nothing else. But last year, I came in her contact as we started studying under the same tutor. We were in different sections but she would always start some convo with me. She was the first girl I talked to so openly. She was a mediocre in studies. Talking to guys were common to him but all of em were her friends. I sometimes used to mock her a bit but she didn't mind.
Annual exams came and coincidentally, she had to sit ahead of me in exams. We started talking even more before and after exams. When they ended, we got a one month leave before the start of new session. During this time, we started talking on FB. We used to talk from around 10-11 pm to 3-4am. That was the time when I discovered my talent of writing romantic rhymes. Used to send them to her as a friend but could never say that "this is for you, silly". My feeling became really strong during this period. She had a control over my mind and heart. I couldn't stop thinking about her.
I even asked for her number which she gave to me willingly. We didn't call each other but we talked a lot on whatsapp. 2-3 weeks after that, she started ghosting me. I did every possible thing in the world to communicate to her but in vain. It really tore me up💔 My world ended that day. I didn't know what to do. I really cried a lot!! It took me some time to overcome that grief but deep inside, some marks are still there, some unwanted scars of heartbreak. We're still FB friends but we don't really talk. Moreover, both of us changed the school so we never see each other either.
This is the main reason that I don't want to have a crush. I don't really wanna feel that again. I'm much better on my own. That's also the reason that I hate those who ghost others and I really hate ignoring someone too. I just can't really ignore someone so easily, especially if we're connected to each other.😢
That was all for this one😊
This is one of the most heartfelt takes I've ever written💓
Hope you liked it💛
Love you all!
See you people again❤️