Everything You Need to Know About Friend Zone

[whyisitso]

Hola mi amigos! This is a little different myTake. Maybe some of you think friendzone does not exist. Yeah, well, it does in some peoples head.

Why you are in the "friend zone"

This needs a little deeper digging. How did you two meet? How well do you know each other? Why have you not made a move yet?

There is a difference between a friendship and a romantic relationship. So why is it so hard to understand why you are only friends with them? You are only friends with them because you are too coward to do anything. It might also be they tell you "we're just friends", because you made your move too sudden without any warning. Basically, you are not trying enough.

How to get out of that

If you wanna charm a person you need to slowly give them hints and flirt a little. Do not make it too obvious too soon. Be patient, it is a slow progress. Have you ever watched Friends? Just look at Monica and Chandler:

If they are not feeling the same after trying to get closer to them, they most likely just will not change their mind about you. In this case, why do you want to be their friend? Is it enough for you? You can also walk away because it is usually just awkward to stay friends with someone that you feel so much more towards. Torture. So... There is no "friend zone" if you are not letting there be. It is all in your head.

You have to accept that not everyone is going to like you in the romantic way even if you would be an amazing friend and a great person. Do not hang around and cling to something for too long, getting all bitter at the same time. Be brave, make your moves and accept the truth.

Instead of friend-zoning

If you feel like your friend has feelings towards you but will not talk about them or make a move, you can bring it up. You do not have to be hard on them - just feel the air.
How to tell if your friend loves you?

Value THEM as a person more than the friendship you have to help them get out of the situation, if you do not feel the same for them. This is important! Do not make them suffer just because you enjoy their company.

[brocklee]

I am of the opinion the Friend Zone requires initiation of one party and acceptance of the other to actually take effect. In other words, one side can state they just want to be friends, but the other side does not have to accept it. They can reject that idea and walk away. Thus they were never actually "friend zoned".

I feel this is important as one of the common feelings the "friend zoned" person has is a sense of powerlessness. If they understand that they DO hold power in this negotiation, and exercise that power when someone wants something undesirable from them, it makes the whole thing a whole lot less painful. They made a choice in the situation.

[whyisitso]

Yeah!

[bulletbob555]

Yeah true. I've been thinking about this lately myself. I think there is the attraction somehow you've forgotten to get your point across. I think when people say something about ruining the friendship. They should say that they just wonder if they still be friends if the person says no. If eventually it doesn't work out well that's whats always gonna happen or not. Think about how good it could be not how bad.
To say you could ruin a friendship with sex is saying you could ruin ice cream by putting choclate on it.

[whyisitso]

Yes! That's a good way to put it!

[Anonymous]

Its by accepting it. Respect their boundarys but dont loose hope at the same time. Be their friend and be loyal. Then show theme your good qualties and come into each moment w theme w a good mindset. they may have a change of heart if u do this bc it shows good character.

[ChiTown33]

There's only one problem with this. Women are very good at reading guys And some women will exploit this. "oh, i know he likes me so i'll keep feeding him just a enough to keep him hooked".
If you can stand it stay friends. But it's best just to walk away. Have respect for yourself. And be the next woman's everything so she can what she missed.

[noubigdumbdumb]

Personally, I think it's what the definition of friendzone that really matters. I personally have been accused of "friendzoning" someone but it's just that I didn't see them as more than a friend, and wasn't overall attracted to them in that way. I also I guess have been "friendzoned" myself, but I feel people misinterpret this a lot. I am also a big advocate of that to be my lover, you also have to be basically my best friend, so I feel that the friendzone is just an excuse for some people who can't into relationships with specific people.

[Maik567]

"You are only friends with them because you are too coward to do anything. It might also be they tell you "we're just friends", because you made your move too sudden without any warning. Basically, you are not trying enough."

No, most likely you're only friends with them because they are not physically attracted to you.

I'm sorry but the fact that you'd take examples from tv-shows shows how detached this mindset this is. The truth is that people usually decide within the first 3 seconds whether they find someone physically attractive or not, so if you "charming" someone takes weeks or months before they will even go on a date with you then clearly they aren't very interested in you in the first place.

I completely agree with you about there not existing a "friendzone", no one is forcing you to keep being someones friends if you want something more but they don't. It's often just to move on completely and spare your own feelings.

[monkeynutts]

I don't like to use this expression, I think friendship is sacred, as are intimate relationships, to act like I'm dissatisfied with a friendship because I want an intimate relationship with a woman, it is a counter productive mind set, and belittles the whole meaning of friendship and love in general.

[whyisitso]

Good! I don't think this expression is really relevant ever, but some people still use it.

[monkeynutts]

I think its probably relevant to some people, I personally would not develop feelings for a woman that was not attracted to me. Also if it was a one-sided relationship where she was contacting me only to offload her insecurities and neurosis about her boyfriend's, I won't stick around long just because I find her attractive, im a man with little patience for other peoples bullshit.

[Cask23]

Your overcomplicating it based on your bias POV as a women with unconscious actions and rationalization create the friend zone.

Women subconsciously crave a strong man, mystery, a bit of nervous excitement around him, someone who flips the chase, and a man who is desirable by many women. A beta male obiter is none of that. He's weak, ever trying to please her, always trying but never getting, predictable with no mystery, and is not desired by other women.

Beta characteristics do not subconsciously strum the strings or make her panties wet.

That is the friend zone.

[Partywithtom]

That's almost exactly what she said.

[RolandCuthbert]

And what are the women in the friendzone called?

Haha!!!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=i3A2mb5z4qA

[Anonymous]

If I am friend zoned, I just go away... I am not interested in being friends anymore because it's too weird and painful. Just leave them alone... and move on with your life.

[whyisitso]

Yes, this is one option... but you know? you are not really "friend zoned" then.

[Opinion Owner]

What do you mean?

[Wammu]

You left. You're not friend zoned.

[Opinion Owner]

@Wammu I was friend zoned BEFORE I left. I left in response to being friend zoned.

[Wammu]

You still left. Trust yourself bro. It takes 2 to be friends.

[Opinion Owner]

@Wammu You're right!

[grega239]

if you find urself in the FZ, walk away from that person. bcs you'll be used as an emotional tampon, a should to cry on and so on. besides why torture yourself by being around a person that doesn't feel the same

[Anonymous]

No, this is bullshit. Never be in the friendzone, and never work your way slowly from it like the owner of this wrote, that shit NEVER WORKS. Hell even Monica and Chandler didn't do that, they fucked randomly one night and that was it, there was no build up from friendship, because that shit doesn't work. Just be clear about your intentions from the get go with every person you like. If they like you - good. If they don't - even better, now you saved yourself a lot of time you would have wasted on a person who is not interested. Friendzone is not a place anybody can keep you in, its a place you willingly step into and stay there. But you can walk out at any time. Men and women can never be true friends and friendship with the opposite gender is not worth pursuing.

[JustWorthlessMe]

Too funny Women are all for the friend zone concept because 1 They have the power. and 2 Women are so rarely there.

Kind of like a rich man agreeing that poor people don't need insurance or healthcare

[Opinion Owner]

@JustWorthlessMe Pretty much, yeah

[bubble_tea]

Good take. People should just start testing the waters sooner than later and keep their distance if the other doesn't reciprocate their flirting. It saves heartache and time for both parties.

[JustWorthlessMe]

It's all about looks It's about the "BIG LIE"

If you're ugly, your female "friend" will keep you dangling... letting you cluelessly try to win her heart... knowing that she will never, ever date you unless something happens in her life and you're one of her last options.

[Riggers]

There’s no such thing as a friend zone, it’s basically the ugly zone, it’s where people (men and women) put people of the opposite sex who are good people but not aesthetically pleasing to them.

Everyone in a “friend zone” basically just needs to know that the person you like thinks your ugly.

[whyisitso]

So you think your friends are ugly? I think you are ugly, at the inside at least.

[Riggers]

Where the fuck did I say I think my friends are ugly? Oh yeah.. Nowhere...

And I am very ugly inside and out. Yes.

[Gottabsavagee]

Being friends with the opposite gender always ends up with one part wanting more if not both. It’s just nature and thank god, it is that way!

[Kemil_Zhoki]

Any time a chick tries to friend zone me I blaze a happy trail. I have no desire to be an emotional tampon.

[Anon-ymous1]

... The Friend Zone definitely exists. I appreciate the premise of your message and what you're trying to help people feel, but I think it's incorrect.

[whyisitso]

It does in your head. There is no relationship zone or sex zone, so what do you mean with friend zone? The fact that you accept being only their friend? Well, there is no such zone to be honest.

[Anon-ymous1]

It's figurative, not literal. ... Obviously.

[whyisitso]

Yes, but it still isn't something the other person forces you in.

[Anon-ymous1]

No... it's not about "force," you're right. I don't really know what you mean by that.

[whyisitso]

I mean, that you choose to stay there as their friend. You choose to be a friend. It is not a zone. It is being a friend, who wants more but accepts the role of a friend.

[Anon-ymous1]

Well... when the alternative is, not knowing them or being anything whatsoever to them at all, people don't want to choose THAT, so they choose friend. So, no, it's not really a choice.

[Marinepilot]

And they lose every time.

[Wammu]

@anon-ymous1 cutting people off is a lot easier than you think and incredibly liberating.

[Anon-ymous1]

@Wammu Well that's easy to say, unless you're infatuated with them.

[whyisitso]

So you think a person who wants to be your friend but isn't sexually/romantically interested in you is friend zoning you? Really? In reality you want to be with them so much that you accept to be only their friend even if they do not feel the same for you. They actually doesn't do anything.

[Anon-ymous1]

"In reality you want to be with them so much that you accept to be only their friend even if they do not feel the same for you."
Yes... right. That's what I said. That's what the Friend Zone *is.*

[whyisitso]

Yes, and it is only in your head. You create the problem yourself.

[Anon-ymous1]

Well... no, again, because since the other person isn't romantically interested in you... why would it *not* be the Friend Zone?

[Wammu]

@Anon-ymous1

I was and I did. My respect for myself outweighs my affection for some girl.

[genericname85]

i'll make this a little shorter:

if you feel like you are in the friend zone, stop being friends.

[whyisitso]

Yeah, that's one way to put it. 😅

[genericname85]

That's better for everyone involved.

[whyisitso]

That's your opinion

[genericname85]

well that's my experience. you can't stay friends if you like them more than a friend, cause you'll hurt constantly and not get over them.

[Anonymous]

AWALT. They first "friend zone" you then asks "Where all the good men are?". We are where you left us lmao. If you stop choosing jerks over us, you won't get hurt. Do you think that we have to be rude to gain your heart? Lol. I am not buying it.

[Gopnik]

why do i still look on this site when everything related to shit like this just pushes me down more mentally.

[Anonymous]

So you said get them out of the situation? How and what are your recommendations for that? Your answer appears incomplete.

[whyisitso]

Did you read the take?

[Opinion Owner]

I did. You said help them get out of the situation. How?

[whyisitso]

Ok, you meant the last part? Yeah, it is always depending a lot about the friendship and the relationship you have. Not very easy to just throw one way there. The thing is that you just start to talk and do not make it a tabu. In many situations you can just tell them you only see them as a friend and because that's not how they see you it is not possible you are friends anymore. (but this assumption you can not make yourself, you have to discuss that too)

[Opinion Owner]

I have only seen one guy climb out of the friend zone and enter a relationship with a girl which is quite sad.

[Mick3y88]

Which I had more to add I was just friend zoned by a guy I was dating before but good intake.

[es20490446e]

How do you exit the friend zone?

Very simple, I look for someone who already likes me as a lover.

[Danxsarah]

Normally a friendzone is a safety trigger for people who dont think the opposite sex will be a good partner