Hopefully, you will fare better than that patient above, a victim of poor communications.
Interpersonal communication is the process by which people exchange information, feelings, and meaning through face-to-face communication. It is NOT just about WHAT is actually said - the words used - but HOW it is said, and the non-verbal messages sent through tone of voice, facial expressions, gestures and body language.
Let's take a look at what actually goes into a successful "communication cycle", and then review just four of over a dozen important tools to help improve your communications. (So please don't tell me I missed some: if people would just work on these four, there would be far fewer misunderstandings). :- )
THE COMMUNICATION CYCLE
The sender (messenger) has an idea.
This idea is "coded" into some sort of a transmission form. It might be human speech, graphics, icons, video, music etc.
This code is then transmitted to the recipient via a "channel", ie, radio, TV, speech, sculpture, images, etc.
It is now up to the recipient to decode and, hopefully, understand the message.
First, the sender must be able to put an abstract idea into some understandable format. The format should be suitable for the idea/message being sent. Rather than describe a golf ball as a "1.62 ounce dimpled spheroid 1.68" in diameter", most would think that a photo would be more understandable.
Second, that medium must be successfully transmitted to the receiver via a "channel". A blurry picture of that golf ball is useless.
Third, the receiver must be able to decode the information just transmitted. Hearing the message "Liathróid gailf", for example, wouldn't decode into anything very understandable unless the recipient had a good working knowledge of Irish.
Finally, the decoded message must be interpreted back into the original message meant by the sender. (Was that a golf ball, a speckled beach ball, a round beehive? ) Wow! No WONDER there are misunderstandings between the sexes!
Now that we know a little bit of the Communication Cycle, let's review these four critical skills with which we can improve our communications.
1. BE OPEN - ENCOURAGE FEEDBACK
Whether negotiating the fine points of a corporate contract or trying to find out which food your date prefers, be open to feedback- good or bad- from your fellow communicator. If this can't be done or at least agree to in the beginning, any communications to follow are almost surely doomed.
2. LISTEN ACTIVELY
Focus on the one sending the message. Listen actively! And even WATCH, actively, too. Note any gestures that contradict their verbal message, such as crossed arms, etc. If they are speaking too fast, or with too much specific jargon, or with any other "fillers or noise in the channel", have them repeat or clarify for understanding.
3. PARAPHRASE FEEDBACK
Repeat the message received, as necessary, in your own words, to demonstrate your understanding of the original idea as coded, transmitted, decoded and interpreted.
4. AVOID FILLERS AND NOISE
Read the following sentences, A and B.
A. Er, like, kinda keep these- you know- extra, like, words than you really- like- need to a- wha'd 'ya' call it- like, a minimum.
B. Use only those words needed to clearly express your idea.
Which is easier to understand- A or B?
Research has shown that specific speech "noise" patterns belong to certain demographics. The filler "like” is used heavily by the 20-something generation and is perceived as "cool". The word “so” is favored by those in their 30s and an “uptick” or “upspeak” — ending a declarative sentence in such a way that it sounds like a question — by women in their 20s and 30s. You probably don't appreciate noise on your radio, so, try to get rid of that static in your speech, too.
IN CLOSING - - - - -
It's amazing how many questions are asked on GaG each week that are nothing more than hesitancy in providing feedback to communications, communicating poorly with someone else, or simply not communicating whatsoever. Hopefully, these hints will help those who really DO want to communicate. Good luck!
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