Are "Real" Relationships Dying A Slow Death Or Can True Love Still Survive And Conquer All The Misconceptions In Today's Culture?

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

"Relationships In Peril"

This is "my take" on why I believe relationships aren't working or lasting in today's world.

"Give love to get love"

"Real love is never easy"

People Have Forgotten or Just Don't Know What Relationships Are Supposed To Be About

If you truly love someone, you always want what's best for them. You always consider their feelings. You don't point out their flaws, you accept and love them in spite of them. You never expect more from someone than you are willing to give. You should always love, care, and nurture your relationship as well as your partner.

"You must love from within in order to be loved"...

" Best friend for life"

" Best friend for life"

Take More Time To Be Friends As Well As Lovers

In my personal experiences, my best and longest lasting relationships were always the ones that started as friendships and grew from that.

If we jump into a relationship without really knowing someone, just based on physical attraction that's just lust and not "love". And when the lust tapers down? If that's all there was?

Take the time to find that one person that you can always confide in knowing they'll not judge you but support you. That can always make you laugh. That will not kick you when you're down or even pick you up when you fall, but rather hold you steady so you don't "fall" .

"To love and honor for better or worse, in sickness and health, forsaking all others till death do us part ".

"Soft spoken truth is heard more than shouted angry words"

"Never stop listening to what your partner has to say"

People need To Remember Communication Is Crucial

I know sometimes we fear being honest because of fear of being misunderstood, or hurting our partner's feelings. But words shouted in anger are way more hurtful as well as actions done out of anger or hurt feelings. And if you want to be heard, you also need to listen as well.

Screaming at each other is not communication, it's over talking the other, and then how can you get what's really being said.

Communication is key and crucial in every aspect of keeping a relationship healthy and strong.

"We can't find the solution unless we know what the problem is"

"Burry the hatchet"

And last, but not least:

Forgiveness Is Important

Don't bury yourself in hurt feelings, anger or you chance killing and burying your relationship. When you spend a lifetime with someone, there is going to be times of anger, hurt feelings. But we have to forgive the little things/ issues that arise so that together can overcome the bigger issues in life.

"Thank you for reading and I hope everyone who is reading this has either already found their "true love "

or finds the true love everyone deserves to have"!❤

"brainsbeforebeauty"😘

[Phoenix98]

We live in a day and age of hook ups, friends with benefits, instant gratification and cheaters, liars and selfish individuals.

Relationships and love are hard, they take work and effort from both people in involved.

Laziness is part of why relationships don't work once a guy or a girl snags gets into a relationship they become complacent and people are just more lazy in general these days and lack the drive to put forth work and effort into anything much less a relationship. I think this can also create the problem of taking your partner and their traits, quirks, etc for granted.

Rushing into things is also a problem these days people don't take the time to learn anything about the person they want to be before getting involved romantically with them. And because of that people often get involved with people who don't share their vision of the future may have competing ideals or things about them the only person doesn't like. And who they aren't compatible with or have poor chemistry with. And chemistry, compatibility and a mutually desired view of the future are all things that are needed.

Communication is something I've seen be a problem to, partners don't communicate their worries, fears or really anything. Communication and honesty are vital probably the most vital things in a relationship. When you don't communicate, problems can sit there and fester and then just explode and became real big issues that can threaten a relationship. Same thing applies to not communicating things like what you like or dislike, a lot of people are afraid to do that because of what they think their partner might thing.

Instant gratification people want their cake and to eat it to and they want it now. People these days lack patience.

People lack morals and values these days which I think is part of the problem which people who cheat, lie and sneak around they aren't honest. They lack solid morals and values.

People are selfish these days to, and often forget that it's important to put mutual satisfaction at the top of your list, for both you and your partner, you need to be your partners friend as well as lover and both of you need to make sure the other is satisfied physically but also emotionally.

A relationship needs all of the above and more to truly flourish. I'm old fashioned when it comes to dating, always have been and my past relationships never yielded much. But I still hold out for a solid, healthy relationship, real love, marriage/kids and all that because I know it's out there. I'll have it sooner or later but I think it's worth waiting around or searching for someone who I can give it to and who can give it to me in return. Someone who can make you genuinely happy and who you can do that for in return is worth far more then anything in this world.

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

I think golly just rewrote my mytake better than I did. Very well said. And all the things I was trying to say.
And, when you do find that person, you will be one of the ones to have that lasting relationship, because you "get" it. And I hope you truly find a person deserving of the great man you appear to be. Here's to you finding her in "2020"🥂

[Phoenix98]

Hah sorry about that /=. Thank you/welcome

I hope so and here's hoping lol ^^.

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

No you're good lol

[Phoenix98]

Lol alright ^^.

[TonyBologna25]

I typically don't like cheesy quotes, but these are so true. I'm in what you'd call a real relationship, but it's had a lot of hiccups. At the end of the day, we're always trying our best to make each other happy. I wouldn't want to live without her at this point.

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

Glad to hear it lol
And funny you mentioned cheesy quotes lol just posted a mytake yesterday bout that very thing lol
You should check it out lol

[Moonchild714]

Awesome MyTake my Gal Pal. So True, I believe Real Relationships will always be Majority of Humankinds True Goal in Life. I work with a lot of young people and they are so oppsite what you hear about this Generation & that includes Relationships. I no longer ay Oh Millennials or Our Future is going to Hell, I look at them and say you've refreshed my Faith in Youth.

I use to be a person tgat had to have adventure and excitement in every Relationship and when things would quiet down I got bored, or things got roughand that was my cue to bow out. I can see now it wasn't so much me needing adventure and goid times only I just hadn't found my everlasting True Love. I never opened up to any of the guys I was in "Relationships" with I didn't trust their Love to be Strong enough to Handle the Real Me. Then came my husband and even ehile trying to fight our connection I found myself opening up to him telling everything about even though we were just "Friends" I Trusted him, Trusted his Love, and felt Safe with him... I knew I was going to Marry him just had work past my issues over our age differences. Thank God I did... He's the Perfect Man for Me!!! My Best Friend, My Love, My Husband, & Father of Our Children...

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

😭😭 I'm so happy you found yours.. had mine. Don't think I'll ever have that connection again. Starting to believe it's nonexistent in today's world. Especially after 20 min. after posting this, went to neighbor's cuz she was supposed to give me ride to my doctor's appt. But because she was gone running errand, her husband felt it was okay to chase me around their kitchen, almost tried pinning me, as saying he loved his wife, and justify his actions by being a man. WTF I'm really fucking sick of that buillshit excuse. So, because you're a man It's okay to treat someone that way. My blood pressure was elevated to the point, the doctor feels the need to monitor it. Am I developing high blood pressure. Or is it because one more pervert man thinks not what they want, regardless of how they"re behavior is making someone enter feel.. Sorry, guess in a mood. But good you're feeling better, in a private room day for you🤗

[Moonchild714]

I know what you mean, I know I've had plenty of experiences like that. Not all men are or think that way. My Dad didn't Oldest Bro doesn't my husband doesn't several Men I know just don't believe behavior and mindset and call out those guys.

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

Oh I know. I just really miss my hubby today😓 didn't have to deal with that shit with him around

[Moonchild714]

I understand.

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

I know you do❣

[Moonchild714]

💕💕💕💕

[Phoenix98]

Good to know someone still thinks so lol.

[VegetaSSB]

I am legitimately so sad for you and what happened to you, men like this one your neighbor is married with make me angry and it is these kind of men that make life harder for me and other decent men around, poor woman your neighbor, doesn´t know the kind of man she is married with, i bet he already have been unfaithful to her at least once, if not a lot of times, these degenerates make me sick.

[GreenEyedChelle]

I'm not sure. It depends I guess. People dont have the same morals like they did years ago! And being in a relationship for a long time is a lot of work and people are more lazy with relationships so I see why they'd rather move on than to try harder. there's days when things are bad and I'll think wow it'd be so much easier to leave then to just keep dealing with bullshit. But at the end of the day he deals with me and all my bullshit and bad days. We're still best friends and I still love my partner at the end of the day.

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

Aww that's so sweet❤

[VegetaSSB]

Very well tought and written. I agree with every point you mentioned about what is really necessary to make a great relationship and make relationships in general, not just husband wife, work, and sadly i have to agree with you, the actual and crude fact is that today we are in an age that, as was prophesied by almost all cultures, believe it or not, about the end of times, the love and good and honest relationships between individuals is fading so fast as to be seen as literally almost extinguished.

We are indeed in the times prophesied as the end of times, and this I know due to my many studies in all different areas, such as hidden story, people doing experiments by themselves and showing that a great deal of what is taught in schools and university are actually wrong in a lot of points and so on.

But more on the topic, from my viewpoint the major problems that resulted in the current situation we are living today was the second and third wave of feminism, that really were pushed by paid agents that infiltrated the movement, that was a legitimate movement till it was infiltrated by intelligence agencies that transformed the movement into a war between the sexes really, even tough majority of the defenders will say otherwise.

The second major problem was the movement for sexual liberation, that was a consequence of the second wave of feminism and of intelligence agencies plan to create general caos for a master plan they have for the future regarding the famigerate new world order, that would be a one world government as idealized by the communists, but truly idealized by the people that have backed up communism financially really.

In my opinion the sexual liberation movement was what really created the ground for what we see today, when people aren´t really interested in real and substantial relationships, that need to be nurtured to grow and evolve into a deeper and deeper partnership with time, but instead people are resorting to short term gratification of the sexual pleasure or just using other people to fill their emptiness altogether.

Other situation i think contributed to this generation where genuine and deep relationships are lacking is the consequence of the alarming divorce rates everywhere. I think it affected most the male side of the equation, growing without the presence of a masculine figure a lot of times due to divorce, they simple are too lost in their own identity, and this leads to women of this generation asking where are the good men, maybe the lack of a proper masculine figure in the lives many men of this generation made them not have a very solid identity and maybe they are really lost trying to build their masculine identity without a lot of proper guidance and this leads to fear of commitment and other problems that contribute to the high proportion in failure of modern day relationships.

Other factor that i think plays a great role in the current situation of relationships is the fact that today´s kids are growing too close and even dependent upon high level technology, such as the actual smartphones, computers, television and distant from the real world and distant from face to face relationships, a part from school time, and a lot of times the parents themselves don´t dedicate enough time of their days to their children and compensate for this by literally giving everything the kid wants, by being too complacent and not correcting the child miss behaviors and this in it´s turn is making people act with less accountability for the consequences of their behaviors, especially the bad and anti ethical ones.

If you sum it up you realize why relationships are failing. If there will be a solution for this or only the clean up event will solve this and a multitude of other problems is what i am waiting to see, but I do want to believe that things will start to be sorted out before the event happens at max some 25 years ahead.

[TonyBologna25]

Really well said. 👏

[asomeone]

"Real" relationships are a modern construction. The modern marriage has evolved from a mostly economic relationship into the way it is currently understood, in relation to love. Up until the 19th century, marrying for love was less common than marrying for wealth or social status, cementing family bonds, etc. Interracial marriages were illegal in some parts of the US as late as 1970, and same-sex marriage became the law of the land here in 2015 even though in the 90s a significant percentage of the LGBT community were opposed to assimilating into historically heteronormative institutions like marriage.

As for true love: it exists, and if you equate true love with "real" relationships, there's never been a better time to find. My theory as to why most people never find it has everything to do with timing. Most people know at any given time whether they want to be single or want to be in relationship or even wants to be married. Subconsciously, we're aware of what level of commitment we're ready for, and that awareness screens out potential opportunities for connection. Real love doesn't happen without real connection.

The most important thing, I've found, is being comfortable being single. It's okay to not fall in love with someone you've spent time with.

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

I did have it tho... The till death do you part. Till death did us part... But yeah stay single now by choice

[FatherJack]

Relationships are dying , mainly due to deliberate toxic social engineering , girls are very subtly taught that they are superior to their male counterparts ( my own daughter has pointed this out , without any prompting !! ) , and men are surplus to their requirements... female popular culture in 1st World Western countries , for the last 2 decades especially , is on the " I don't need no man !! " type theme. On the other side of the coin , boys / men are bashed simply for being male & influenced to feel ashamed for merely existing as a human male !! This , plus a " culture " of promoting a self absorbed and self centered mindset is heavily pushed by the " media " and other sources.
I'm a FT working single dad , and so glad I do not have the desire to even date... let alone endure the hell of another relationship , not from bitterness , but simply cannot be bothered with the chore of multiple job interviews ... equally I am in THE most undesirable group.. a man with " baggage " , women do not want single dads & I do not blame them one bit... there are vast numbers of available men , considerably more than available women. Give me ferrets and dogs over the vast majority of people anytime !!

[VegetaSSB]

Your first paragraph summed it up. But this culture will be destroyed relatively soon by the clean up event, also known as the end of times revelation.

[Anonymous]

There's been a big shift in how people are dating at the margins, and less focus on relationships in general.

To the extent that relationships still exist and are stable, they are likely more than they were at one point solidified around raising families, and pooling money.

People who have no money, or people with no plans to have kids, are less likely to be relationship focused then in the past.

As for the success rate of relationships, I think it's down versus say 50 years ago, though there were a lot of long lasting unhappy relationships back then.

I'd suggest one factor (not the only one) is that expectations in a relationship are much less clear than they once were. I don't actually mean so much about fidelity, I mean more about work, time together, sex life, finances and so on. So this in theory lets couples find and use communication to build something that is perfect for then.

In practice, it allows selfish people to try to pick and choose all the pieces they want, building very unbalanced relationships that ultimately make the other party miserable. I suspect that if you go back further, the 'giving' parties had a better sense of what to reasonably expect, and what not to put up with.

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

With that I agree. People treat dating relationships like ordering a happy meal from McDonald's. What saddens me is everyone talks about about what their partner does/ doesn't do for them or should/, shouldn't do. What about what they would/ should do or not do?

[broken_heart_at_48]

I believe it takes more than just true love for a relationship to last. It takes 2 certain kinds of people to make it last. So with the way our society is heading where we seem to become more selfish and less thoughtful and caring. It doesn't look very promising. Lasting relationship are already starting to look like a thing of the past. Out of everyone I can think of that's old enough to of been in an adult relationship for at least 20 years no one is still with their first adult love. Let alone never been divorced. At least my age and younger I can't think of anyone that's made it past 15 years with the same person

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

Sadly, that seems to be true. But there is still people that value the true meaning of what a relationship should be. And maybe some people will get it before it's too late.

[Abtraction]

Why would a man want a relationship?
Why would a smart man risk it?

A single man who works on himself, has a good job, has total freedom. He can do whatever he wants, usually has more money, buys whatever toys he wants, has all his time to himself. My house, cars are paid for, my place is totally organized and furnished just the way I like it. I can cook, clean, and have a washer and dryer. I have a stockpile of all the typical necessities like food, toiletries, ammo, and booze.

If a man marries or has kids he risks it all and has a very good chance he will lose big.

I'm single/divorced, have a good job and plenty of money, and can pretty much have everything I want with-out a relationship. I spend most of my time doing my hobbies, running my business and enjoying life.

I enjoy my peace, I can stay-up all night writing code, playing x-box. I even work 100% remote, so I'm thinking about buying a 50ft sail boat and working from it anywhere in the world.

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

If that works for you... Great. But why do people act like men are the only ones who face risk in a relationship? Women don't 🤔 okay 🤷🏼‍♀️

[Abtraction]

really?

Women have everything to gain, and little risk other than time which is mutual.

If we co-habitat, have kids, or marry. The man has all the risks. He will lose his kids, alimony, child support, and half his assets, maybe even his freedom.

That is why relationships are dead, at least for a smart man.

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

"half his assets"... Men and women both work, both provide for the family, but men still say half HIS assets 🤔 weren't they her assets as well 🤔 so then doesn't she also lose half? And why shouldn't you still have to support your child, parenting doesn't end with divorce. Divorce affects all parties involved, yet some men only think about how it affects THEM, not the other parties involved, especially the children 🤷🏼‍♀️

[Abtraction]

lol, that's funny. Of course it affects the entire family, but it affects the men more negatively. Men know this, and other men are learning this every day.

Not all marriages do both parents work, and not both contribute equally in the assets. It's usually the Man who pays the most and works the longest hours.
The woman gets the kids 85% of the time and mostly men pay child support which is very high. And if the woman truly cared about what happens to the family, why is it over 70% of the time the woman files the divorce.

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

www.americanprogress.org/.../

[Abtraction]

lol, yeah. that's why men pay over 75% of taxes. But women spend all the money and use most of the welfare. Over 70% of consumer shopping is women. Men hold most of the high paying jobs. I make at least 3-5 times every woman I know. Women tend to have crappy jobs.

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

." But women spend all the money and use most of the welfare."
And why is that? Men that refuse to support their kids 🤷🏼‍♀️.
You obviously are biased and want to blame everything on women, without looking at the whole picture...
Why did the courts even start getting involved in ordering child support?
Because men insisted their wives stay home and be a housewife, so she really the house, took care of the kids, and her husband, yet when divorce happened, the man wanted to think it was just "his assets" and should be able to just walk away and not have to provide support for their kids.
So a woman should sacrifice having an education or a career to be a good housewife, but be left with nothing when the husband wants to be with another woman 🤔 would you agree to that? Would you sacrifice your career to take care of your kids and think your wife can just walk away and not pay anything to support your kids? And child support does not cover the full support of a child... Both parents in a divorce have more expenses than a married couple... But of course, it's so easier to just see the struggles the man goes through, for some people I guess... Whereas I know divorced men have struggles, but I also know SO DO WOMEN

[Abtraction]

lol, your biased against men.

You assume I am against taking care of the kids or child support. I'm not.
I am against the women always getting it, and there's no controls on where it's spent, and its too high. Most of the system is corrupt, the court get federal kickbacks, man pays higher taxes on income he can't spent, the woman pay no taxes.
Most of the women on welfare put themselves there either popping out kids or choosing to divorce their husband (70+ % of the time).

Nobody is forcing women to be a housewife , in fact the opposite. women have a choice so they can stop crying about it.

Years ago, and still in some states, we had Fault divorce, that changed everything.

If marriage is SO great why are so many men choosing not to? any many more every day.

Do any research and it's completely obvious the Marriage is a lopsided contract to benefit women.

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

No I'm not biased against men... Just have an issue with men who put the blame for everything on just women... I'm not putting the blame on just men... Cuz not ALL men have to be forced to provide for their kids, not ALL men believe only men get screwed in divorce... My husband was a great man and a great father, and together or apart, noone would if had to force him to accept his responsibilities as a parent... Oh there's a lot of good men out there, I don't blame a whole gender for the negative actions of some... Just like there's some POS women out there, but I'm not going to agree all women are or no women ever get screwed over, cuz that's just not true...

[Abtraction]

lol, it's not that all woman screw over a man in divorce, it's that all women CAN very easily.

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

So can men, by not paying court ordered support, by hiding assets, by leaving women they insisted be a stay at home mom for someone younger and prettier...
People can period...
My three older sisters? Yeah the fathers of their children were ORDERED to pay child support, now ask how many of the three ACTUALLY did? 0 we are talking about now adult grown children with children if they're own, and yet those fathers would still be considered to owe back child support, and what did the courts do? Nothing... And now, two of those fathers are now trying to live off their kids they never supported, so, 🤷🏼‍♀️ see not just men can and do get screwed over, so can the women, so can the kids 🤷🏼‍♀️🤷🏼‍♀️

[Abtraction]

first off most of the women are leaving the men.

What is a woman to weak to say "I don't want to be a house wife?" nobody is forcing these women.

Looks like they chose bad men, maybe they should have closed their legs.

In most states they steal the money right from your check.

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

Really, my oldest sister, her husband was fucking her best friend and then married the best friend and yeah left her with a kid he didn't support either... And some men will work under the table to avoid support...
And then couldn't that be said of men too, they chose bad women and shoulda kept their dick in their pants 🤷🏼‍♀️🤔
See, know matter what, you still putting the blame on just women 🤷🏼‍♀️ if a man gets screwed over, the woman is evil... If the woman gets screwed over, it's her fault for not choosing better 🤔 double standards, hypocrisy at it's finest smh

[Abtraction]

the woman chooses to have the kid, the men are forced to be fathers.
Women have several options to avoid being a parent, men have none. She can kill the baby and even legally abandon it. Men can't.

you women love to put words in our mouth. Most women abuse marriage, courts, child support.
There's very few women who pay child support, very few women go to jail over it. Many men do.

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

Says people on here, but don't see it as much IRL. but okay, I'm not wearing any more time with a convo with someone so clearly biased against women... Have a good day 🙂

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

*wasting

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

Oh but one thing, like you said women can't be forced to be stay at home moms, guess can keep their dick in their pants and then aren't"forced" to be parent🙂

[Abtraction]

yeah, that online dna testing company has published an article says how many men are not raising their own kids.

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

You know it's real easy to get a dna test at birth right? And again people say that on here, but it's standard practice nowadays for the court to order DNA testing for child support cases, so try again 🤷🏼‍♀️

[Abtraction]

lol, BS some states have time limits on the request. There are many men paying child support for kids that are not even theirs.

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

Sure, okay...

[Abtraction]

www.avvo.com/.../time-limits-on-requesting-a-dna-paternity-test

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

www.cbsnews.com/.../

[Abtraction]

the whole thing is a mess.
It's usually starts at 17% of your salary before taxes, can go all the way up to 28% depending on the state.
Often includes adding health care for the children and half of the medical bills.

So depending on what you earn, it can be a lot. And you pay all the taxes on it, the wife most of the time pays no taxes. So the man's tax bracket stays higher.

Also if you get behind they go after you, lock bank accounts, take money, take your drivers license away, fishing, hunting. Go after any other investment accounts. If you get behind due to job loss, only the man feels the hurt, the women eventually get it all back. They will also often try to raise it.

The enforcement really depends on if they think they can collect, if your a deadbeat they eventually give up. If you have a good job, they stick it to you anytime they can. If you have to take a different job at a lower salary, they will continue to force you to pay at the higher salary.

If you have a high salary they don't adjust much, so she can get a very large amount, way beyond the child's needs.

The state and county get a kick-backs from federal funds, so typically the man ends-up fighting the wife, child-support agency and the state. So for a high income father, the wife typically sits on her ass and just collects. They don't force her to contribute, and don't monitor how she spends any of it.

Meanwhile all the money is not considered income, so she can qualify for all kind of welfare. Also most men can't even deduct the children on his taxes.

It goes both ways, men try to dodge it, and many women abuse it. You take 20% off the top of anyone's salary it's hard on them, especially when you know in many cases she spends it on things other than the child.

I pay more in child support than most people make. luckily my kids are almost grown.

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

All I can say is people like you that have a problem, the state has to forever to provide for your children, shouldn't be parents in the first damn place... My husband who would of done anything for his children died and all YOU can say about yours is thank god they're almost grown so you don't have to support them anymore... Yeah, I'm really done here!!!

[Abtraction]

lol, yeah keep twisting things to fit your narrative.

I support my kids, but mostly I support my ex-wife. I will continue to support my kids.
In a real marriage both parents have a say on how the kids are supported and by what amount. With child support the Man has no say in anything.

[Abtraction]

also I am providing ALL the support financially to my kids, she sits on her ass, doesn't work.

[k1ttybaby]

Everybody's too busy fronting to be open to the possibility of real connection. I think it's the falseness of the internet that makes it this way. When you feel it there is no better high no words can describe it and it takes over your world. I miss it so much. Please people dont close off possibility because you're scared of whatever. Take care of your own and you have nothing to fear if you're genuine. The fucking players and bitches show themselves all too quickly. Dont give up on love. And remember: it's a choice to love, the chemistry is the thing that is a must. If you care you can choose to love anyone. Sorry for the rant.

[kymberz]

wow. and you wonder why i fell head over heels in love with you (well no - i fell in love with you after the baby shark video - bahahahahah!)? you express some of the most honest and deep truths so easily. and i truly believe that true love can still conquer all! and thank you for that beautiful magical spell you cast on everyone who reads this. i knew you were a witch!

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

Good witch 😇or bad witch 😈😂😂

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

But thank you for reading and liking it.

[kymberz]

Glinda of course!

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

So, I'll be Gbbbw😀

[kymberz]

yep - but man that's a mouthful - we need a vowel!

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

Lol this ain't wheel of fortune🤪😂

[kymberz]

"i don't care how much i got to spend
can't wait to get on wheel of fortune again
won't throw in the towel
'til i buy a vowel
oh Vanna pick me a letter"

weird al yankovic - smartest guy on the planet! no wait - that was Dr. Seuss. and i'm still singing baby shark. oh brother it must be monday!

[kymberz]

woops. missed a word. "money" and ain't that NOT funny Glinda? ya it should read "i don't care how much MONEY i got to spend"

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

You're funny🤪🤣

[kymberz]

funny as in "ha-ha" or... as in "oh holy mother of all that is holy - that gurl is like batsh*it crazy and is that pixie dust she's sprinkling all over the place? man it takes forever to get all that stuff up off the floor and crap. she's got a tiara on her head?" kind of funny?

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

Umm both lmao🤪🤣😂

[kymberz]

ya i figured you'd find a way to let me down easy - bahahahah! so you really mean number 2! admit it!

[kymberz]

oh and no offense but you are the one who sent me that baby shark video and set me off on this crazy ride when i was born or something. so there! bahahahah!

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

Lmffao

[kymberz]

i like abbreviations. but not really. bahahhah!

[JimmyQ]

True Love is something most human beings will never know. From cradle to grave you want safety, shelter, food and some entertainment to keep you from being bored out of your skulls.

Your mind gets tired of all the flim-flams, shams and scams so you try desperately to find someone who is gonna put up with your crap and not make your life anymore difficult than it already is.

If you have higher morals, you'll marry that person. If you have lower morals, you won't.

If you have a healthy libido and find a person to fall in lust with, then congratulations. If you can find a way to somehow make that feeling last a lifetime, then you win all the prizes.

But just like a day at the park, it will all come to an end and then just like everyone else, you will take our own hide to market.

[Shiningtempest]

Anyone who believes in true love is a naive fool.

[JimmyQ]

@Shiningtempest I believe in true Love, but humans are completely incapable of this. It only comes from God. We can enjoy it through salvation by accepting the work of Jesus Christ, but we are too fled to replicate this without Him.

[Anonymous]

I agree, except I would say it's not such a slow death.

The allure of "real" relationships is largely disappearing for men. Most men I know are very cynical about relationships and about women. Let's face it, women are not what they used to be and they do not offer the same benefits in marriage or a long-term relationship that they used to.

Yes, women earn money now, but that's not really a benefit for men; it's a requirement for a marriage / long-term relationship. So the things women used to bring to the table have mostly been replaced by money, and that is not an appealing trade off most guys.

The sad fact is that the value women bring to the table for men has mostly been reduced to sex, and we can get that outside of a "real" relationship. Add to that the fact that the costs and risks of marriage for men have gone up at the same time those benefits have gone away, and it shouldn't be a surprise to anyone that marriage or other serious relationships are less and less attractive to men.

The inevitable outcome of all of that should be pretty obvious.

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

Are you saying women are only good enough for sex? Wow really?
How bout men don't bring the same thing to table anymore. How bout it takes 2 to make or break any relationship? Yeah people forget that

[Opinion Owner]

Yes, it takes 2 to make a break a relationship. But regardless, a man married to a woman today does not get nearly the benefit from that marriage that his counterpart did decades ago. And, he faces a lot more risks than men did in the past as well. Those are simple and indisputable facts. Are you saying that's not true?

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

For me it wasn't.. can't speak for the rest of you... can't teach you when you find your loved one dying on your floor... none of the little shit you idiots are whining about really fucking matter.. but for the last time.. can't fix stupid.. so done...

[Opinion Owner]

I'm sorry for your loss. That's terrible and I'm sorry you experienced it.

But I'm not stupid, and I'm not wrong. I know what I've said here pisses people like you off, but I'm just giving some facts about what is happening in society today. It's fine if you don't want to hear it, but that doesn't change the fact that it's true.

I'm not blaming everything on women. Men are different today too, and in some not-so-good ways. But I know if you take an honest look at marriage today compared to what marriage was 50 years ago you will see what I;m talking about. It's different in some very big ways, and most of the changes are negative ones for men. The average married man today simply does not enjoy the same quality of married life that a the average married man did 50 years ago. The benefits are fewer, and risks are higher. And that is the primary reason why so many men are avoiding marriage today. Plain and simple.

You can call me names if you want, but I speak the truth. If it's not obvious to you yet, it will be before long.

Cheers

[Anonymous]

The internet ruined relationships tbh. Internet dating is a complete sh*tshow, but then you still want to get your rocks off? You can just watch porn, and the local women you thought were hot suddenly become 6's because the models you see on the internet are the most beautiful people in the world. And the don't reject your clicks, so there's no consequences. Or some celebrity you like is just way more interesting than anyone IRL could ever be. Most people aren't anything special anyway.

Nobody is ever good enough for anyone anymore. THat's what it feels like. It's terrible.

[Massageman]

Great points. "Relationships" have become too superficial in today's "me- me - me- I want it now" culture. Perhaps the original Willie Wonka and the Chocolate Factory (with Gene Wilder) should be required viewing to help straighten them out.
Thanks for the post.

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

Thank you and lol willy Wonka maybe they should... and funny that's what I always say this me me me , I, I, I but relationships supposed to be "we" or "us"

[Massageman]

Right, right, right!

[Avicenna]

Excellent Take, but in a world where many people are talking to multiple other people at a time, I don't think we have the luxury of taking months to get to know each other, especially online. This means we have to really get to know each other once we go exclusive.

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

Why I'll stick to the old fashioned way or not at all.. you talking to me to get to know me, better not be talking to someone else at same time. And if they are, nope that don't work for me.

[Avicenna]

If you specifically tell me that you want to do that, I'd be fine with it, but without that explicitly being agreed upon, it has to be assumed that you're talking to multiple people, especially if we meet on a dating app.

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

Maybe why I'm not on dating apps. 🤷‍♀️

[Avicenna]

You're not missing much, but, nevertheless, if someone doesn't know what your expectations are, they can't meet them

[Screenwriter]

Last time I was on a dating site, I communicated with a few dozen people looking for someone who I clicked with. It was all chat though. I worked my way through 39 people over several months... about three. Then met three of them in the end and ended up with one where the vibe seemed mutual. I don't see the problem with texting or emailing several people who communicate with you. When it comes to meeting them, then you need to be down to two or three. I don't see that as a problem if you're just getting to know someone.

[Stephen_77]

Of course real relationships are dying. But let's be honest, it's women who have mostly fucked things up, women and the government. It was women, starting in the 1960's, that decided to rebel against marriage and motherhood. Look at the attitude of most young women today: "I don't need a man. I don't want marriage and children. I'm a strong independent woman." And even the women who do get married, it's mostly women who file for divorce. And look at how many women choose bad men over the good men, just because they find the bad men more exciting. With the sexual revolution and the brainwashing of feminism, I can't see real relationships making a revival. Once you change the morality of a society it's almost impossible to reverse it. Sure, there are some relationships that are strong and real, but they're in the minority. The only way things will improve is if women switch off from all the brainwashing and go back to their traditional gender roles and start taking relationships seriously and start choosing nice guys rather than bad boys and assholes. But that's just not gonna happen. Women have fucked it up and most won't even admit it. So yer, real relationships will continue to die.

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

People have fucked it up, not just women. I'm getting tired of some men blaming women. So men are totally blameless? The men who have a good women at home, but still fuck the secretary at work. Or the ones that think a wife is their property, so I'd ok to physically abuse them? Not all men that have money or a good job or appear to be a good guy. You don't know what they're like behind closed doors. Nor do you know why women choose to get divorced but a lot end because of adultery or physical abuse. So I suppose they should just stay and take it? Maybe relationships after dying because more men are women bashing all women. Who wants to be with a man that talks, acts, thinks that way?

[Stephen_77]

This is the problem. The majority of women just won't accept fault or blame. You're focusing on the exception to the rule. I use to have a book called "Who Killed the American Family." And it was written by a woman. She spent years researching into the root causes of failed marriages. And after years of research she concluded that it's was mostly the fault of women and the divorce laws. For example, she quoted a study where hundreds of women were asked why they divorced their husband. The majority of these women did not say, "Because my husband was abusive or committed adultery." No, most of these women gave reasons like: "I didn't need him anymore; or I knew I would win in court." In other words, these women were divorcing good men for selfish reasons. It happens so often, women divorcing good men and running off with douchebags. Are men always blameless? No! But in most cases it does seem as though it's the women who fuck things up. Not to mention the divorce laws ans family courts are on the women's side.

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

One book written by one woman makes this true. Ok, sure. I hardly think I'm the exception to the rule.
Every woman I personally know who has gotten divorced were for reasons very different than that.
Do some woman get divorced for bullshit reasons? I'm sure thet do. I didn't say women are "never" to blame. I'm saying they're not "always" to blame like "you're" making them out to be as you're accusing women of not accepting fault or blame, is that not what you're doing? Blaming most women? There's fucked up women, there's fucked up men, there's fucked up "people", period. People need to blame those people individually, and stop blaming the whole damn gender.

[Stephen_77]

I wouldn't say every single woman, no, but I would say the majority. Give women authority and they fuck things up, especially relationships. And this book was based on multiple studies, but I guess you'll just ignore it and believe whatever you want to believe. Women make very bad choices when choosing a partner. They date ass holes when they're young, and when they do finally marry a good guy they usually divorce him, take his house and kids, and then move onto their next victim.

[SweetDisaster]

Your wrong my BFF got divorced because her husband was a lazy asshole who didn't want to work in a real job the only real job the man ever had was been in the military for 4 years and the was it, and he only wanted to just keep living with his parents eventually she got tire of that crap and when they when to court for divorce the judge decided to let the ex husband keep there child instead of the mom who's been taking care of the baby sense it's been in her belly and she was a stay home mom for her baby. The only reason why the judge let him keep the baby is because he was in the military what kind of bullshit is that. Until this day the man still lives with his parents and his child. Pathetic. Now my BFF was devastated and she had to move on.
Because of her story I decided to always be single and never get married. I wouldn't want to go through crap like that. I'm happy the way I am.

[Stephen_77]

@SweetDisaster So basically you're doing what most women do and focus on the exception to the rule. In the book "Who Killed the American Family" which was written by a woman, she provides mountains of evidence to show how in most cases the courts favour the woman and that it's mostly women who fuck up marriages and relationships. But over the years I've learned that no amount of evidence is going to convince people who don't care about the truth. And one final thing. I'm sure men couldn't care less if you stay single. Nobody wants to be with a bitter sour woman.

[SweetDisaster]

Lol I could say the same thing about you. But I'm not, because I unlike others I don't know you so I can't judge you. But I'm pretty sure people don't care about your opinion. Sense you seem to put to much hate towards women, but who am I to judge a pathetic soul. Good luck in life, your gonna need it. 😜✌

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

Bitter much? Ok, I will always discuss things rationally with other people willing to do so. But you just want to keep bashing women, so I'm not going to waste my time. Have a good day, Sir😊

[Stephen_77]

@SweetDisaster Ah ha, when somebody can't handle the truth they just resort to shaming tactics and run away. It's ok, I'm use to it. Enjoy your cats :)

[Stephen_77]

Another cowardly lion that hates the truth. Typical female.

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

@SweetDisaster
I hear you. Some men keep blaming women and keep making bullshit assumptions, excuses, but those are the bitter ones who can't find/ keep a woman. But far easier to blame "women" than to take the blame themselves

[SweetDisaster]

I called those pathetic souls lol 😆

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

And another bitter lonely man that can only feel"manly" trash talking behind a computer screen.

[SweetDisaster]

Lol if his even a man 😆😂🤣

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

@SweetDisaster
No that would be using the term loosely. "Real " men don't talk, think like that.

[SweetDisaster]

And that's a true fact 😉

[Stephen_77]

@SweetDisaster Most women can never accept the blame. You give them facts with evidence and they resort to shaming tactics. Well done.

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

@Stephen_77 What real facts/ evidence? One book and your bitterness does not make ther garbage women bashing real fact or real evidence.

[Stephen_77]

Yes, a book based on multiple studies over many years, which the female author spent years researching. This is the problem. You don't care what the truth is. Women like you are like sulky children. You just believe what you want to believe and won't take the time to do any research. The book is filled with evidence, and I think most people know deep down that a lot of women get divorced for selfish reasons. But your female pride and ego prevents you from admitting it.

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

😂😂😂you're funny. Okay then, sure if you say so, it must be true😂😂

[Stephen_77]

Ok kid, bury your head in the sand and ignore the evidence if it makes you feel better.

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

I'm older and wiser. Your're assuming while I'm going by real life experiences. But you keep basing life based off one book you read. And when you've sustained a relationship for over 20 years, maybe then I'll listen to your "opinion's" otherwise I think you should be "burying" but not just. your head, but your misguided assumptions and bias as well "kid".

[Stephen_77]

Like I said, it's a book based on multiple studies over many years. I've read it, you haven't. Go figure! Or is that too complicated for your tiny brain to comprehend?

[MysteriousDarkness]

@Brainsbeforebeauty
I agree with what you are saying.

@Stephen_77
What is a women supposed to do if her husband refuses to get help for his addiction (alcohol, drugs, gambling etc) or if he does he goes right back to the addiction not long after rehab?
What is the woman supposed to do if her husband is controlling, abusive, constantly neglecting the kids etc?

[Stephen_77]

@MysteriousDarkness I'm not talking about the bad men, dummy. I'm talking about all the women who divorce good men for selfish reasons, or women who choose bad boys over good guys.

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

Well unless she studied every female man, relationship, it still don't mean Jack. But keep slinging them insults, you just further proving my point about people like you. 🤷‍♀️Enjoy tho😊

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

@MysteriousDarkness
Thank you sir. Maybe he'll listen to you cuz I'm just a lowly, irrational thinking tiny brained female to his all knowing about every female, hear me roar man🤷‍♀️

[Stephen_77]

Fine, lets just ignore any study that we don't want to believe. Facts just don't matter. Truth is based on how we feel. Female logic.

[MysteriousDarkness]

@Stephen_77
So you do not want to answer the questions I asked. Is it because the answer does not fit what you are trying to prove that all divorces are done by women for ridiculous reasons which is not 100% true? Just answer the questions. Here they are once again.
What is a women supposed to do if her husband refuses to get help for his addiction (alcohol, drugs, gambling etc) or if he does he goes right back to the addiction not long after rehab?
What is the woman supposed to do if her husband is controlling, abusive, constantly neglecting the kids etc?

[Stephen_77]

@MysteriousDarkness Hold on a minute, I never said that a woman never has a good reason to divorce her husband, you dumbass. Funny how people never bother to read what other people say before they spew a load of shite. If a man is abusing a woman then she should divorce him. But that wasn't the topic. I'm referring to women who divorce their husbands for selfish reasons.

[MysteriousDarkness]

@Stephen_77
How many women in total did tge author use for all the studies combined? In one study you said hundreds si that is why I am asking.

[Stephen_77]

@MysteriousDarkness Go read the book for yourself. For years I've told people where to find the evidence and they're too lazy to look it up. They just want to fight and argue with you and aren't interested in the truth. Get the book and read it for yourself.

[MysteriousDarkness]

@Stephen_77
Why are you dodging my questions?

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

@Stephen_77
Again you mentioned that damn study, or how I feel, dumb female logic.
Here's some dumb "female " logic for you. My first husband was very controlling and very physically abusive. Yeah, I know in your "F'd up way of thinking he was just exercising his rights as a man, and I must of done something to deserve it right? Yeah, I went to school and work where the were males so I must of been fucking them. If a
I even spoke to his brother or father he went crazy. His own mother had to beat him off me with a broom as he was choking me to death. So, that is fact, not from a fucking book.
But yet, I still didn't/ don't judge al men or bash all men because of the fucked up actions of one fucked up individual (. The only good thing I took away from that relationship was that we never had children. )

Had I, I wouldn't of had 20+ years with a wonderful man who was great man and a great father to our children. And before you put your foot in your mouth like the asshat user who told me I chased my husband away cuz good men want sex, too. My husband got "chased away" by dying and the sex ended because he was too sick for sex.
And yeah, that was a female. Which further proves "my" point. That stupid comes in all shapes and sizes, colors, and genders. You keep hating "all" for what one or some did to you, or your precious book, I'll stick to judging by three individuals I deal with. You have a right to your thoughts or opinions, but stop stating then as facts/ evidence please.

[Stephen_77]

So basically you're choosing a few life experiences over a book based on multiple studies done over many years. Ok then.

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

Omg you really can't fix stupid. You think I'm the only one with those experiences? Go bother someone else with your crazy hateful ways, why you'll never have a relationship.
But hope that works out for you.
This convo over for me, not cuz I'm turning tale cuz I'm respectful, and I don't know how much longer I can stay that way taking to someone like you, so again... good day sir

[Stephen_77]

Go on, run away you cowardly lion.

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

Dude if your views weren't so messed up, I didn't almost feel sorry for you, I'd say you're hysterically funny. Notice how "you" backed down from @MysteriousDarkness and his direct questions cuz even you know you're full of shit. But you keep throwing insults at me cuz I'm a woman lol ok but who's being "cowardly"... you got my character wrong in that movie. I'd be "Glinda the good witch"😊and you'd be a munchkin with your small minded views 😁

[MysteriousDarkness]

@Stehpen_77
He you going again with havingcsomethingvto say but not answering my questions. Obviously you can not answer them or you would have by now.
What is a women supposed to do if her husband refuses to get help for his addiction (alcohol, drugs, gambling etc) or if he does he goes right back to the addiction not long after rehab?
What is the woman supposed to do if her husband is controlling, abusive, constantly neglecting the kids etc?
The answer to both of those questions are to divorce him since he has given her at least one major reason to. Wait you do not care since those questions focus on guys who are major screw ups instead of good guys. You are only looking at women who screw over good guys by divorcing them and are not including women who get a divorce because the guy is making her life worse by staying with him.

[Stephen_77]

@MysteriousDarkness No, dummy, I did answer your question. Are you blind? Can you not read? Or are you too lazy to read what I said? Go back and read what I said. I did answer your question. Duh!

[Stephen_77]

It's not my fault that you're too dumb and stupid to understand that a few life experiences does not supercede a book based on multiple studies.

[MysteriousDarkness]

@Stephen_77
Do no blame just women because guys are at fault as well. Their are guys and women who get into a relationship and then when they get what they wanted or they stop getting it be it material items, money, sex, a service they leave

[Stephen_77]

@MysteriousDarkness Go back and read what I said, dummy.

[MysteriousDarkness]

@Stephen_77
Still at it with the name calling. Grow up.

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

@MysteriousDarkness
Don't even bother. You can't fix stupid

[MysteriousDarkness]

@Brainsbeforebeauty
I know that.

[Stephen_77]

@MysteriousDarkness Go back and read what I said, or are you too lazy or stupid?

[MysteriousDarkness]

@Stephen_77
Just stop for your own good. The more you respond the bigger of an idiot you seem to be.

[Stephen_77]

@MysteriousDarkness Go back and read what I said, dummy. Or can't you read?

[MysteriousDarkness]

@Stephen_77
Still trying to hurt me by calling me a dummy makes me laugh. I am more intelligent than you will ever know. I am done with you. If you respond it means you are an idiot who does not know when to quit.

[Stephen_77]

@MysteriousDarkness It's not my fault you're too lazy and bone idle to read what other people say before you start posting ignorant garbage.

[MysteriousDarkness]

@Stephen_77
Just shut up already because I do not care what you have to say at this point.

[Stephen_77]

@MysteriousDarkness Ok kid.

[MysteriousDarkness]

@Stephen_77
Not sure why you are calling me a kid when I am 36.

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

@MysteriousDarkness he called me a kid and I'm 47 but guess I'll take it as a compliment lol

[MysteriousDarkness]

@Brainsbeforebeauty
Giess at this point he is just saying things for the sake of saying something

[Stephen_77]

Because you're both adult children. You're adults with the mind of a child.

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

Dude wtf are you smoking?

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

The pages of your precious book?
That you bullshit bout that too.. you glossed over everything that book addressed... I do my research

[Stephen_77]

Even if the book didn't exist, I still know that it is mostly women who fuck up relationships.

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

Dude convo over.. think your mommy is calling you.. you do live in her basement still right😂

[Stephen_77]

I guess reading an educated book is too much for your tiny brain to handle lol.

[Clayaya]

You’re such a fuckn idiot my gosh 😂

[Stephen_77]

@Clayaya And you're a asshole

[ThatGuy133]

It's a combo of dudes being lazy and technology allowing them to take the personal part out of communication. They no longer need to approach you face to face and it lets them get the balls to skip a bunch of steps to get to the crap they want.

Slowly and surely it's going by the wayside.

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

Even when they get the relationship. How many men and women are in relationships and flirt talk dirty and think is ok cuz it's the internet do it's not real.

[ThatGuy133]

Yea, it's an endless cycle of stupidity. People just looking for that quick nut/fix

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

Lol yeah I guess.

[akihon]

True love doesn't exist if it ever did anyway. I don't believe that it's something that's even possible today.

The sooner marriage goes back to being a negotiated settlement between two families the better.

I don't believe that women have the capacity to actually love men, I've seen and experienced too many times that a man is only loved by a woman for what he provides and doesn't ask in return.

So given that most women clearly lack empathy, mental stability and the ability to actually feel anything more than greed and envy why would any man opt for such a disastrous idea such as the concept of love.

[ferrer6060]

You dont seem to know or seen the beauty of love. i guess you've always been in a relationship with the wrong person.

[akihon]

Ah yes I love nothing more than being told I'm in the wrong for being with the wrong person. Oh how I love that it's the person on the recieving end being told it's their fault. I honestly never get tired of that

[SarahsSummer]

I’m not sure what misconceptions there are but, Yes, Real relationships are continuously dying while new ones are continuously forming and flourishing.
Besides, a “real” relationship far surpasses any fake ones people of today are wasting their time on.

[blutwolfe]

yeah they're dying at a rapid rate, almost everyone I know is single and will never settle down basically. People think too highly that they deserve the best or some shenanigans, life is too short to be thinking like that. It's a self centered society. I think there will be a few that survive but it'll eventually get phased out. I have hopes, but well they are hopes, not reality.

[Anonymous]

Everything you mentioned is destined to fail, unless the dominant ego is 'dissolved' To do so means facing yourself, will likely be very uncomfortable, will require meditation, reading, practice, and may cause depression, anger, anxiety and hopelessness. Perhaps this is why few put in the work to do so.

Something to bear in mind. If you suffer from compulsive thought, cannot stop thinking, or have no control over your mind, then the ego is very likely in the drivers seat. Therefore this barrier of compulsive thought and incessant internal chatter will always get in the way of anything real, including love.

If you want to know ow to break out of this compulsive, addictive problem, read the book 'Power of Now' by Ekhart Tolle, and pay particular attention to the state of 'No Mind', or learn about it.

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

My relationship didn't fail... it ended in death. But still lasted 20+years and if not for illness would still be going strong.. cuz we "got it" . But thanks for the advice

[Opinion Owner]

There are exceptions. I also know a few others, but it is not the majority.

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

I agree just respectfully agree tti disagree why is happening

[nelly83]

I think people nowadays are way too shallow to understand what true love is. When you ask someone about who they want as their partner. Their response usually is: someone who looks hot, someone who makes a ton of money, someone who is tall dark be handsome. These aren’t things that will make you truly love a person.

Divorces happen when people marry for reasons other than longevity or compatibility.