How to know if your boyfriend/girlfriend is for real or just using you.

[Yuushiro]

Yes, I know this is an old meme, but g@g required that I use one XD

First off, I'm not a dating guru, just a normal person who has some insight into the minds of manipulators. Anyway, there's one test you can give a person to see if they are trying to manipulate you or not. I'll explain it to you first, and then give you some more information about it afterward.

The test is very simple. You ask your boyfriend/girlfriend to go buy you a coffee from Starbucks. If they go, their heart is probably in the right place when it comes to your relationship. On the other hand, if they say no, there is a chance that they are just using you.

I do want to be clear that, if your boyfriend/girlfriend refuses, they might have a good reason for it and you shouldn't doubt them (although you can totally ask why). The idea behind the test is that if the person cares about you, they'll value your request for coffee. If they go out and get it for you, they clearly value your need/want more than their own time, which most manipulators don't. Obviously, if he/she is in the middle of a work project that he/she really cares about, he/she might ask that you wait a few minutes, or suggest you go and get it yourself. In this situation, someone who is manipulative or immature might put their own personal wants over your request.

That being said, I do want to caveat everything I just said with this. If you're asking him/her for things all the time, and he/she feels like he/she's already giving you a lot, he/she might outright refuse you for that reason, so make sure you reflect on your relationship before testing him/her. You might realize that he/she is already doing a lot for you, and decide not to test him/her after all.

Please don't use this test as a make or break test. It's clearly not 100% accurate.

I hope you all have a great day/night!

Note: If you aren't a coffee drinker, you can totally switch it up to hot chocolate, tea, some new pencils, or something else like that. The idea is that he/she has to put a LITTLE bit of time and money into you. If you ask for something too big he/she might say no for that reason, and if it doesn't require any effort from him/her then there's no point in asking in the first place.

[Wise4myage]

A sure sign of getting used is when sex is all they are after. They have interest in anything else, but will pretend they do.