A Note On Giving Trust

[hahahmm]

A man wrote, "I'm wondering if it's worth being a faithful man. I had to go on a long business trip for 10 months. I told my girlfriend that I'll try coming back earlier. While on the trip, I was earning 3x more and saving it. Part of the money was spent on my surprise gift for her. I've manage to convince my manager to be excused early. I came back after slightly over 6 months.

I found out she cheated practically the whole time I was away. There was my surprise and I had to take another flight, go back to that jewelry store and return it. Honestly, do girls generally like faithful men or not much? I'll never get back 4 years of my life wasted."

Answer: Trust is sort of like financial credit. Imagine if you were worth millions but you started walking around town giving large loans to random people based on how good their smile is or how big their tits are. How long would it be before you were broke since the people you gave loans to either can't pay you back or don't want to? But if you carefully chose people based on their ability to work, keep their promises and started out with small loans instead of big ones, you'd do way better, right? You gave this woman a huge line of credit based, probably, on nothing but her appearance and ideas in your head. You didn't pay attention to the signs that she was disloyal. No way did she only start cheating on you the day you left town. More like she was cheating on you from the 1st few months you knew her.

So let's re-phrase your question.. is loaning money a waste of time? The answer depends on if you're the founder of Bank of America/Chase or if you're just a guy who is blinded by love. Those banks use objective measurements instead of feelings. You can use objective measurements too... like "did she lie when she said X", "did she flirt with that dude?" "Did she dress like a total whore to supposedly go visit her elderly grandma? Why would she do that?" And so on.

I'm not gonna lie and tell you that the percentage of women out there who are a good catch is high. But to get them you also need to be a good catch. Check out my MyTakes.

[Datboi65]

I'm gonna be honest. I don't believe in the concept of "true love". I believe in commitment for practical reasons. Relationships are mutually beneficial yes, but you cannot step into it being completely subjective thinking love beats all, only to be surprised that she is pregnant and the baby isn't yours. Same thing goes for women who are looking for men. That's why vetting is very important. That's why prenups are important. That's why paternity tests are important. You partner might find that offensive because they think you don't trust them, but you have to protect yourself first and foremost, especially if you have a reason to doubt them. If they have a past, don't get with them. If you doubt them, better to break it off. Certain things you should do with most people anyway just in case, like a prenuptial agreement, or vigorous vetting, but if you feel like something is telling you to ask for a paternity test, something is very wrong and it most likely is too late. Blind trust just like true love is a myth, because paying attention to red flags is necessary.

[OlderAndWiser]

"Trust is sort of like financial credit." An interesting analogy which I have never previously considered. I will ponder that for awhile.

[msc545]

Almost all women cheat. Hypergamy.