If a girl says "leave me alone" because you screwed up does she really mean it? Should I give her time to cool off then contact her? is there no hope?

[suchbucks]

My friend Julie is pissed at me and cut me off rightfully so. I was kind of an ass and played with her feelings. I like her too but Im not sure what I want. she's a bit older than me and Im worried about things like what if she wants to settle down adn get married and have kids sooner than me, what if she finds me immature, what if I just want to play the field for a little longer? she says she's not in a rush she's focused on her career, enjoying life and she wants me to enjoy my life too but recently we got into a fight and she told me to leave her alone and stop talking with her and stop playing with her feelings and confusing her. so i totally screwed up but does she really mean it? do girls really mean it when they say "leave me alone"? i dont want to lose her but i dont know what i want.

[short_stuff24]

I think you just need to let her cool down for a few days. But if she really does like you, she probably doesn't really want you to leave her alone, especially if she's hoping you like her too. I'd give it a few days, then try and talk to her. Tell her you're done playing games and just want to be honest with her. And you actually have to be HONEST. Tell her exactly how you feel, even if it's not what she wants to hear. I am a female, and I cannot stand being played or being lied to because it makes us distrust males and hurts us... it makes us want to be left alone because we are scared. If she's not in a rush, just try to get her talking to you again and see how things go. Your feelings will eventually tell you what you want to do. Hope this helps a little!

[suchbucks]

how long would u wait for a guy to come around though? what if i wanted to take the rest of the summer to myself and figure my lif eout?

[short_stuff24]

Honestly it really depends on how much I liked the guy. My ex didn't want time to himself completely, but he didn't know what he wanted either. We were "dating" for like 4 months before he committed. No girl really wants to wait if they really like you but if she believes you are worth waiting for, she might. But that doesn't mean she might not leave other options open because you're not committed and she shouldn't have to limit herself because of that. She will do what's best for her, based on her feelings. Just like it sounds like what you're doing. Good luck!

[cupcakeangel365]

You should really give her some space and let her assess her feelings right now, Sounds like you made her very frustrated. I understand that you want to still play in the field but you shouldn't play with her feelings like that. If your not sure about how you feel about her maybe you should leave her alone for a bit and figure out what your goals are. Maybe they are with Julie and maybe they aren't. And if you want to be with her like Short_Stuff suggested be honest with her. Good luck.

[suchbucks]

what if while im trying to figure out my life she goes off with someone else? i know she was going on dates even while we were friends

[cupcakeangel365]

Oh well then. Its not fair for her to get her heart plays around with when she has goals to work on. Maybe it will work out in the future, but right now you two are in different places. You should talk to her and maybe you can work something out. Sounds like you really don't want to lose her. Give her some time and then talk to her. Im sure she'll understand.

[tragicallyinlove]

Just give her some space so she can figure it out. don't talk to her. wait for her to come to you. or if you do want to talk to her do it with caution. because everything you say can and will be held against you. just let her frustration simmer down. she will be back to her old self in no time and then you should sit down and talk through your relationship and the problems you're having and get them worked out.

[Emmaloveslillies]

Um, NO. We don't mean it. When we say 'leave me alone' it's like we are saying 'change your approach'. If you've been playing with her feelings, this needs to change. If she can see you changing your approach, then you will not lose her. But, before you do anything, do you really like her? Do you think life is better when she is around? Ask yourself, and you'll come up with the right conclusions.

[suchbucks]

it is better when she's around she's the only person i can talk to about everything. i just dont know what i want

[Aiko_E_Lara]

If you don't mean it then tell them about it. Why not tho?

[DerrickRicketts93]

She probably means it. I say if you really want to be with her then you need to make a decision. Do you want to be with her and only her or do you want to still play the field? Can't do both man lol thats where you get in trouble lol.

[Anonymous]

They mean it. Leave her alone, at least for a little while.

[razelove]

Hell yeah, completely ignore her until it's all better. She's older than you and y'all will have kids together with no problem some day in the future. When her career takes off more. Maybe don't worry so much about losing her or not, and just worry about yourself and your desires more like she's telling you to do.

[OlderAndWiser]

1. Assume tat she means what she says untl you have a reason to think otherwise.

2. You don't always get a second chance.

3. Dude, you are 34 and she is older. WITF did you think she would want?

[sarah2205]

I've been through the same thing as Julie has.
I have told my guy bestie to stay away from me.. even though he kept calling, I kept avoiding.
The point is.. girls think a little more about d future. So if she wants time, it's coz she wants some 'space' to get her mind back in place and not make a fool of herself by being the 'no love' receiver & maybe get time to know if you're 'the one'.
Give her time.
Keep in touch randomly & talk about stuffs other than you'll. Don't desolate her completely.
When she's fine, she'll let u know!

[Anonymous]

You want to play the field, and have Julie as a back up in case that doesn't go well. You really like her and care about her, but not as much as you like yourself.
She doesn't want that. She just wants you to stop sending mixed messages, (in the hope that you can confuse her and use her, long enough to find someone you are actually in love with) and let her get on with finding someone who actually loves her.

[Lilmonielove]

Let her cool down then go back for the talk. Be prepared to get cussed out and only go back if you plan to do her right. Don't waste her time or your own. Be real w yourself and w her.

[Anonymous]

yes. she seriously means it. if she's a bit older than you, she has no time to play around. you guys are in your mid to late 30's for fucks sake. start acting like it, dude!

[Aiko_E_Lara]

Then go leave her alone. She's gonna come back to you. If she's mad for actually leaving her alone, that's what she told you so you can't blame yourself.

[XxXBeccaXxX]

It means either prove you actually meant what you said or admit that you straight up lied for your own personal gain and let her go.

[yaddayaddayadda02]

Yes she means it, leave her alone.

[In_Trance]

bruh...