Fluctuations in feelings in my relationship and not sure if it's normal?

[Anonymous]

I've been with my boyfriend for about 2 months. I find that my feelings are way stronger when we have sex or right after we have sex than other times. If we even go a few days without having sex, I feel myself start to get kind of bored and irritated and sometimes I even question whether I want to be with him or not. But usually, we have sex almost every night. So when we've had sex a few days in a row, I have a lot stronger feelings and am very happy with him, especially right afterwards. The first time I couldn't spend the night at his place (he was having problems with his back because he has a tiny bed), I went home and was so upset and lonely I thought I was definitely with the wrong person because I felt so disappointed and lonely. I know about oxytocin release during sex, but I'm wondering if this is a normal thing? In the past I've only ever slept with guys I wasn't in relationships with so I have experience with attachment but not such strong feelings of caring for someone. Is it normal for this to happen? What feelings should I trust, the ones after sex or the ones when we go days without it? I'm just kind of confused and need some guidance here.

[William_Kendrick]

it sounds like a normal roller coaster relationship to me.

lets clairify some things.

you sound as if you're attributing sexual gratification to emotional attachment...
THATS BAD. dont do that, ok? sex when in love is way different than when its just for physical gratification.

let me break it down.

firstly, your feelings are NORMAL... its normal to question a relationship with a person, sexual or not.
secondly, its normal for your emotional state to sway back and forth, as everyday is a new day..

the real question here is how he feels about you.

confusing, right? i mean shouldn't your feelings be about you?

the problem i'm having coming to a conclusion for you is the fact you didn't tell us if there are any problems in the relationship.. so i'm going to assume there's not.. feel free to comment and tell me any generalized details you want without getting to personal :)

does he make you happy? it sounds as though you guys enjoy sex together, so thats good...
if he makes you happy, if he is happy, and if you two talk about your emotions, everythings all good

if any of these things are answered 'NO' then you need to reevaluate your relationship.

never allow sex to blind yourself emotionally; its just sex, thats all. it IS a good thing to be sexually compatible, whats not good is to assume that sex itself if what makes you feel in love.. because thats not love sweety.. thats lust. if you keep questioning your relationship, chances are.. something IS wrong, and you should bring it up with him, and not us :)

i'm so sorry for being confusing. hope that helps.

[Braveheart4321]

Sorry to say this but I think you may only like him for the sex. if you are OK with that then awesome you can keep screwing all you want, but if you question the relationship whenever you don't have sex then you should be with someone else.

[UberTroll]

It's normal when you're infatuated with somebody and not really in love with him. This just tells you that he's not really the right guy for you and your feelings for him are completely physical.