My friend slapped his girlfriend after she slapped him-- was he justified?

[Anonymous]

My friend and his girlfriend got into a fight in public, and she slapped him in the face. He immediately slapped her back. She was stunned for a few seconds, then started crying. Her friends came to her and immediately started cursing/ screaming at my friend.

Some people have stopped talking to him and others are badmouthing him behind his back, calling him a woman-beater etc. I told him he was justified and that didn't change my opinion of him, but people are upset with me for sticking with him. Even my own sister is angry at me.

Was what he did wrong?

[little_bird1]

It depends who was in the wrong. If he did or said something really nasty to her and in public, I could understand why she would slap him. I mean it's just a slap, not an actually fist. If that's the case then he shouldn't have hit her back. But if he didn't really deserve it then I guess the same slap with the same strength was fine.
I slapped my ex boyfriend once like that. We were sitting in a part with some friends and he kept on talking how I sucked some huge cock in the past to everyone. I nicely told him to stop but he was so into the story that he ignored me. I told him to shut up 3 times but he was so into the story that he ignored me. And then he said "... well in the end she received a nice butt-fuck" and I just snapped and slapped him right there and then. It was just beyond my control, I was so pissed! I didn't use my whole strength, pain was not the point of that slap. If he slapped me back, I'd say that wouldn't be justified. My slap wasn't justified either, I should've just walked away, but in that moment my body and my instinct was controlling me and I figured it's the only was to make him shut up. And to put him down in front of everyone, like he did to me.

[btbc92]

Both were wrong. They should have never allowed their debate become so unhealthy and violent. If this keeps continuing, I suggest that he apologize to her, and then leave the relationship. Tell him not to stay and end it. This was never healthy from the beginning. He still needs to be the better man and apologize. Do I believe that she deserved it, yes because she was the one who did it first. But did he handle it well? No, he did not. But he definitely doesn't ned to be with a person like that. The right thing to do is just let it go and forgive her for slapping him.

It would do good for them to not be with each other if their going to behave the way they do. And if she breaks up with him, aw well. Either way be there for your friend and support him in this ruff time. But she shouldn't have hit him. She should have kept hew hands to herself. And he should have walked away. The wise thing he should have done if he couldn't walk was to grab her wrist before it made impact.

[BruceWang]

Sooo why does the guy have to be the better "man" and apologize instead of the girl who started the whole thing? Why should be be the only one to apologize?

[btbc92]

@BruceWang Both needs to apologize, but the way how she is reaction she may not even do that. Either way he still needs to own u to his faults as well. He needs to do this for himself. He is going through a very ruff time. This will NOT just be slipped underneath the rug. Especially since he did this in public! Everybody in that area saw what happened.

[btbc92]

reacting*

[btbc92]

Revenge is NEVER the answer on his part. His reputation is on the line as well. If other potential women hears about what he's done, they will not bother trying to date him. That is why I said what I said, and either way he still takes the fall. I'm concerned about his well being. That is why I said what I said.

[BruceWang]

So why can't you ever say exactly what you just said but instead of "he," saying "her?" Why can't you say "she needs to own up to this?" Just because she's a girl and was crying?

[BruceWang]

Yeah but I really doubt guys will still think of that girl the same way after that. Do you think a girlfriend that slaps you in public is appealing to guys?

[btbc92]

@BruceWang Nope. This has nothing to do with either of them being male or female. The point is this: We don't know what she is going to say or do. We don't know her mindset or type of character except from what happened. I don't know her personality, I can only take a guess, and still be wrong. I feel for the guy, I really do. Be he is not a child and neither is she. She behaved extremely childish for smacking him. But he should have grabbed her wrist and get her away from him instead of smacking her back. That is where he was wrong. Its how he reacted.

[btbc92]

The right thing to do as an adult is to BEHAVE as an adult. There was no excuse. As I had said before. I don't know either of them, I was not there. I can only imagine. But I would questions his morals and way of reacting to things. Im not saying that he doesn't have the right to be angry, he does. But he will have to face the consequences of his actions sooner or later. God forbid she wanted to pressed charges, even if she did the same thing. Police will get at him for hitting her because he's a guy.

You understand? He has to be smarter than that.

[btbc92]

I do not agree with her just because she is a female. I'm for your friend, but I cannot agree to what he did. I'm giving fair judgement. Because she sounds like the kind of person who would be too proud to apologize. He needs to show her that he is better than that, and how she made a serious mistake in hitting him. He doesn't deserve that kind of treatment. But others will not take it so kindly to his reaction.

[btbc92]

@BruceWang If course not. But I'm sure there is plenty of guys who would go for her anyway if she got the looks and offers them what they want. But its still not socially acceptable either way. I don't agree with it either. But I'm not these people. I'm only stating the reality of things. She can always lie and string along a guy to believe her. But he needs to stay away from her and drop the relationship. As well as stop dating girls like her. Their trouble makers.

[btbc92]

Again, he is an adult. And as a adult myself I expect him as an adult to behave like one.

[BruceWang]

So you can't say that about her because you don't know her personality? Wtf do you know about the guy's personality to call him out then? And guys don't have cat-like reflexes you know, you don't know how fast she slapped him if he even had enough time to react and even be able to grab her wrist before slapping him. And you would question his morals yet not hers? You're just trying to put all the pressure on the guy and just let her off the hook because she cried and you "didn't know her" and "she's a stranger."

[BruceWang]

You literally haven't criticized anything about what she did except for "what she did was wrong," yet you say all this shit about what the guy shouldn't have done and what he should do.

[btbc92]

@BruceWang I know based now hat you wrote. I don't believe that he is a bad person. I hear from your expression and emotions in this description that he is a kind person who may have a problem with handling his emotions. She sounds like the type that is catty and childish but also sensitive and prideful. Her friends wouldn't just go off the deep end if they wasn't similar to her.

They don't sound right for each other and it seems like she is using him emotionally. Most girls I know who behaves like her are like robots who feeds off of each other. He turns to you as one of his best buddies. He's in a reck right now, based on how you've put it. That is why I said what I said. I am not calling him out. But I'm not dealing with her, your advocating for him and this is why your asking this question. And I'm telling you that he has to stand up on his own two feet and not be prideful like she is.

[btbc92]

And the reason why I said that about questioning his morals is because I'm straight. I'm referring to how I would view him as a man. I know how other chicks acts and I disapprove of it.

I'm not putting any pressure on him than what he's already doing to himself if he does't pull through. This is not my issue. I'm only trying to help because I don't agree with the situation. He needs to know his worth and believe that he is better than what his girlfriend is trying to make him. She's putting him down low and making him seem like he's beneath her. He's not. But he needs to believe that for himself.

[btbc92]

what*

[btbc92]

@BruceWang So you figure because he's a man he's the right as well? You don't think I don't think she deserve's it? Of course she deserves what was coming to her. She didn't think before she acted, but neither did he. I'm looking at both parties. Not who's male or female just because I'm a female. If a female gets slapped for hitting him, then so be it. She was the one who started first. However, he is still going to deal with negative views for now on. They will not look at her. Only smart people will do that.

Again, if she was here on GaG and disputed whatever it is she needed to say, is only when I can give a full judgement on the matter. But this is not happening. I can only give advice based on this situation. He still shouldn't have hit her back. He should have just walked away. I respect a man who does that than does the opposite.

Because trust me. That woman is a loose cannon. Many women are. She probably loud and boastful, and everything else that makes a man want to jump

[btbc92]

... ship because of it. But if she has to do all of that because of her, then its not good. I always say this: No man/woman is worth dying, getting hurt, losing your salvation or getting arrested for. No one. And he needs to learn to develop that mindset or else these women will get him into serious trouble.

I'm not joking, I'm serious. You think these women today care how badly they hurt a man? No. They don't. They rather use them than love them, because they have no love to give.

[btbc92]

sorry meant to say: if he has to do all of that because of her...

[Anonymous]

They are both very wrong. No one should ever be resorting to physical violence and hitting someone else let alone a loved one who's supposed to protect you, respect you, and keep you out of harms way. There are already enough possibilities of physical violence being acted upon us without us having to worry about a loved one doing it. She was wrong for even taking things to that level but he was wrong for reciprocating. The odds are that if he's stronger and larger than her and if she gave a wimpy, weak, powerless smack that stung for all of 2 seconds, he just hit her back to soothe his punctured pride. Not cool. It may vindicate him in the moment but he better never expect her to view him as a protector again.

[MargaritaPeach]

Your friend reacted to being slapped. He didn't act on impulse like she did when she slapped him first. She deserves what she got. We all have natural reactions to physical confrontations where instinct kicks in. It's a built in defense mechanism. It's why, in the legal field, 'self-defense' is a valid mitigating factor. Because medical hypothesis supports it.

[Maxemeister]

He was completely justified but that doesn't make it wise. Society will just eat at him alive. Because we live in an "equal" society, we now live in fear of everything we do. So all he can do is bend to the will of the insulters. Do that instead of complaining because then people call you ignorant misogynists. Tell him good luck

[Jager66]

I support your friend 100%. Self defense is ALWAYS okay and it makes zero difference if the person your defending your self from is a woman.

Your friends, her friends, your sister are all acting like sexist assholes. Your friend is the victim and his girl friend is the assaulter, he could press charges if he wanted to.

[IsraelJordan]

I believe in equal rights. EQUAL RIGHTS AND EQUAL LEFTS media.giphy.com/media/xT1XGLzxTFgIwxcbcY/giphy.gif

For one slap, i would not have hit back. If she is seriously kicking my ass then i would defend myself. It's just a slap, man up.

[fueledbythc]

Not at all. She hit a man so she deserves to take a hit from a man. I wouldn't act thst way in that situation though. I would have just walked away, not turn back and never talk to her again after a slap. If she was threatening my safety and gave more than one slap, I would stop her out of me not wanting to get hurt.

[Tarvold]

Open handed slap right?

Yeah. He did good. You need to stand strong by your friend, because other people will try to bend the truth over time. Nobody deserves the bullshit bullying that he is/about to go through.

[AleDeEurope]

She's an abuser, I hop he dumped her. He wasn't right for hitting her back, two wrongs don't make a right, but she deserved it. She thought because she has a vagina she can hit everyone she wants XD

[Anonymous]

No she deserved it... an eye for an eye... at least he had the guts to fight back. Just cuz she's a woman doesn't mean she can physically abuse him and not expect it back. Feminists want equal rights so they should be ready for this too.

[Anonymous]

That's a childish way to handle the situation but I'll admit. I'd have a hard time not slapping her back. A REALLY hard time. My mom tried hitting my dad once and he threw her across the living room onto the couch.

[Anonymous]

He probably should have let the first one or two slide, but she had no right to hit him. Nobody should ever hit anyone else unless there's a $30 million prize at the end of the fight.

[bobbyxx]

Yes she deserved it, hope he left a mark. That is typical of women, they think they should be allowed to hit men and get away with it. Those women and her are misandrists.

[Anonymous]

Honestly I would never hit a woman and think it's really cruddy of a guy to do so but if she hit him first then he wasn't necessarily in the wrong. Equal rights equal fights right 😂

[zagor]

If it was just a spite slap he didn't need to respond. If she hit him with the intention of hurting him then she deserved it.

[Anonymous]

My brother has slapped me a million times, and I don't usually make a big deal out of it… So, he was justified, but it was really unnecessary.

[CisScum]

Okay but who started the argument, that's the key element.

[Anonymous]

He should leave her. This is how female initiated domestic violence happens. Girls will abuse men with the feeling that they can't get hit back

[Jager66]

this is exactly right, he is dating an abusive woman and needs to get the fuck away form her!

[Dred1614returns]

He shouldn't have hit her. I wouldn't be surprised if she leaves him.

[Dark_Scorpio]

The bitch deserves it. If anything he should dump her.

[Raymond_Reddington]

This story is obviously about you.

[Anonymous]

She deserves it.