The question you asked is can you change someone to suit your liking, and the answer is no. If you like someone you must accept them for all their faults and flaws as well as the things you like. The only way to change a person is when the person wants to change. Change must come from within or it will never work, the person will revert back to their original behaviour. The biggest mistake a person can make going into a relationship is thinking you'll change the other person. That's acknowledging you are incompatible on some level from the start. I read in a book that you must accept, not expect; we must not expect things from others. Instead we must accept the person as they are and what they freely give and are as individuals. If you do not like who they are and what they give, move on and you will eventually find the person you're meant to be with.
It is beyond the capability of a human to change another unless the person being changed desires to change with all their heart. Even then, the road to change is arduous and not quick.
No... Not without physical applications like enacting slavery.
People seldom have any self control/awareness and they just act from the matrix of their biology. Unless you either teach enlightenment or use foriegn chemicals, such as drugs, to alter their mind, they will exist under the influence of whatever chemical reactions exist throughout their body already. You may offer suggestions that seem in the interest of the person, but you will not have changed them but only enabled a preexisting motor.
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Anonymous
(30-35)
+1 y
You definitely can since people change. But in all honesty why would I want to. If she was a bad girl to begin with and she somehow became good that doesn't take away from the fact she use to be bad. You can't change the past and people like that most likely have done questionable things. She probably partied to hard and made poor choices. Choices that would affect the present. I mean if she has rode the cock carousel a few too many times that's not a woman I want to be with, regardless of being good or bad at this point. Also her past just mean there is a likelyhood that she will revert to those ways. Which would be at the back of your mind all the time and could never fully trust here. Better of just finding a good girl to begin with, which unfortunately in current society is almost impossible.
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Anonymous
(25-29)
+1 y
That's kinda the sad part. Yes and no. A bad boy some times is tamed. But that isn't until his looks are pretty much gone. The girl thinks she's finally got him to settle down and makes her feel special. But really he just picked the latest one before he can't pick anymore. But even after he's married and "tamed", he's still gonna try to cheat. Just not be so open about it.
Girls on the other hand aren't so lucky. It's messed up to say but once a girls looks are gone, she's done. She already ruined her reputation by being a slut. All she had were her looks. They've been getting hit on by guys for so long that they refuse to believe it. That's when you see those older women who keep trying to dress like they're young. All gross with their stomachs hanging out and their saggy tits in that open shirt. Like I said, gross. And her options are pretty much going with the most desperate drug addict just so she doesn't feel lonely. I see it 5 nights a week where I work.
It might be possible to "tame" someone with a wild personality. But is it a good idea? Generally it is better to accept people the way they are or move on to someone more compatible. If a person truly WANTS to give up bad habits, like binge drinking for example, it is possible to meet their partner's expectations. But manipulating or coercing a person to change their identity or lifestyle, when they don't want to, tends to backfire in the long run.
If you are dating someone in your teens, sure. You are both still maturing and establishing your worldview. Any older and you would have to find someone who is already trying to tame themselves, or seeking someone to tame them. (Which sounds weird, but it happens)
I think taming isn't the right word. Maturing perhaps is more the case. And so they should. Mature. Mind you, and I have no one in mind in particular, but a lot of the so called bad boys of today are soft as. Too thin skinned to let the smallest 'disrespect' slide. How times change.
You can change some things about them but you can never remove the bad aspect from how they think and act. Its just a personality trait in most and that is something that can rarely be changed.
For example: At 16 I was raided by the police and was in a heap of trouble. I was extremely lucky to only receive a formal caution. I told myself after that I would be a good guy.
By 18 I got myself a great new job. I was ambitious and extremely driven on creating a career from it. 12 months in I apparently had a 45% higher complaints rate than anyone in the office. I realize that its simply because I would always divert back to my original mind set of doing absolutely anything necessary to succeed regardless of the consequences.
I'm not a bad guy with women by the way, just with everything else in life. Trying to suppress the bad personality traits will just be like caging a wild animal. Live with it, embrace it, its not such a bad thing!
Especially as people get older, they mature, if you help them mature into a less wild person then yes you can, but some people have matured to be wild, as it suits their personality, They might not be willing to change. Unless they feel their wild behaviour is damaging things they care about more than the rewards of the behaviour they will have no inclination to change.
Of course couple of zip ties sound proof room that bad boy/girl. Is yours after, 1000 hours of Leave I'll shoot you. Like the deer on the wall. (A joke obviously) - Personally some people just never want to settle down. But I can see a lot eventually falling for someone and changing how they act or even there whole idea of what they want in life.
No. Even age can’t tame wild people. Fucking hell, my friends nan is in her 70s and has dyed pastel pink hair and WILL start fights if you piss her off. She’s awesome.
Don't take that as a challenge, take that as a warning: I will hurt you, I will let you down if you seek a relationship, and you know something? I don't give a fuck anymore.
Maybe you have an interest in taming a boy, but for me I have no interest in "taming" a "bad girl." You've already been that thing and that's the problem. I wouldn't matter in that moment if you suddenly became "good." That just means you're no longer getting worse as time goes on. Given the choice, the girl who has been the most "good" for the longest time is the one to go with. I think that actually reflects the Jay-Z quote.
i would say so nobody can tame me but yet again i don't want anybody to and it is funny because i look like a good girl but that is only what i want to show people after 10pm comes around you can't even tell it is me anymore
You can't do anything, they can only change themselves. No your love won't work, nor your belief in their in beauty. My favorite movie, white chicks, had it done perfectly. The girl who wanted a bad guy finally stood up to him and told him she wasn't his booty call, and if he didn't change then she would leave, so he walked away. There are very very few girls a bad boy will change for, I'm talking.001% and girls have a hard time facing the fact in all likely hood that they aren't "the one".
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