I don’t think so, I think it’s an excuse to let yourself go and get lazy once you’re no longer trying to attract a partner. When I had my first crush on a guy, I went out of my way to finally lose all my baby fat in order to attract him and to feel more confident about myself and more comfortable in romantically pursuing him. We dated for 2 years, and I never gained back the weight I’d lost even when we got to the point where I knew he was blindly in love with me and would probably have stayed with me no matter how my physical appearance deteriorated. I liked feeling good about myself, and I liked the confidence I’d developed because of my body.
Some people aren’t like that though. Some people feel relieved when they no longer have to eat healthy or work out because they know their partner now loves them too much to leave them, so they let themselves go and gain weight. Then they use having fallen in love as an excuse, as if that somehow makes it fair for them to take advantage of their partner’s emotional attachment to them.
Yes. If you carelessly pop in oral contraceptive pills you will gain weight as a side effect. Explains why a lot of women start gaining weight after marriage. Look for other alternatives of birth control.
Besides that, trust me, anyone who is in a good satisfying love life, especially a good fulfilling sex life, knows that dolling up and being perfect at all times isn't necessary and these things really don't matter (of course it doesn't mean you genuinely won't care at all, but it makes you low maintenance overtime). Which isn't a bad thing, by the way. I've even heard people saying that if a woman in a relationship is still dressing up and being all pretty, unless she really has a passion for skincare and fitness it just means that her current physical relationship isn't satisfying her enough.
Relationship weight gain certainly is a real thing. Not everyone goes through it, but some people might become low maintenance in other areas of life, such as clothing and accessories. It's not necessarily a bad thing always.
Many people try to get in shape or retain a good shape. While trying to find a relationship. However depending on who there are. Many often stop trying to hard to keep there physically looks over time. So they slowly gain weight or loss muscle tone/mass. Has been a thing for a long time. However there are also those. Who try to maintain or get into shape while in a relationship. Either for themselves or for there partner.
That is what I was going to say.
All that, and also a your body stores more fat when you're in love cause of hormones telling it to get ready to have children and all that. Even if you're not thinking about it. But ofc your physical reaction to it will far trample any "path your genetics are set on", like, if you're deathly afraid of getting fat and hence do anything for it not to happen ofc you won't.
I think weight gain is more of a getting older thing. When a girl becomes single though, they do tend to put effort into losing weight of course because they know they'll get more attention. Then they ease up on it once they find their next person. It's like reloading the fishing hook with fresh bait.
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I think a lot of people try to stay slim because they are lonely and want opposite gender attention and once they get it they might let themselves go. My cousin when she was in the middle of a divorce was very very thin - like 90 pounds or so. When her husband and her reconciled and they decided not to get divorced after all - she gained 60 pounds.
My other cousin wore a size 2 and after her marriage she discovered her husband didn't care if she was fat and she went up to a size 8.
Yes. Being in a relationship makes you more comfortable and couples enjoy eating together a lot so there is in fact a tendency to gain weight.
journals.plos.org/.../journal.pone.0192584
It’s an effort to keep the weight off but it can be done as well.
I’ve come to realize that even an active couple can gain weight
I usually lose weight... because I know someone is going to be seeing me naked so I want to look good!
My husband has put on a little bit of weight and I gained some for a while when I had kids.
I'm in my 40s now and taking much better care of myself.
Of course. It's called 'fat and lazy' for a reason. Neither is on the hunt any longer.
But it's all a big mistake, for nothing in life is guaranteed, and if your spouse becomes disillusioned they're highly likely to shut down, cheat bail, or any combination of.
I've seen it happen to other couples... I think it's when a sudden change happens quickly and then you immediate fall into a state of "comfort" that the weight begins to pile up. I'm in a great loving relationship and haven't gained weight yet but I'm also like you and terrified of it (since I've seen it happen to people)-- but I think if you are dedicated enough into making it not happen and dont fall too deeply down the "comfortable" path, it can definitely be avoided
It's called happy weight. People get into relationships and they get happy and comfortable so they aren't really watching what they eat and such. They're focused more on just being happy and in love. I watched it happen to my best friend. She's been smaller all her life. Had her son and bounced right back. Then she got with her current boyfriend and has been happier than ever and she got thick. Her lucky ass got thick in all the right places tho.
Well in realty it happens due to many reason but mostly, when they become too comfortable with their relationship and too confident to care enough about maintaining a healthy lifestyle.
Besides, how will you keep the flame burning when you're losing the initial thing that ignites the attraction and passion between the two of you.
well with my boyfriend and me, we are both fit people. He plays hockey and football and has a very nice six-pack. And I play basketball and badminton, but also work out five days a week. I'm not as fit, since I do have a little here and there, but still.
Been together with my wife for 20 years and married 12. You get comfortable and when you also have life stress or family things you are not worried about if they will see you as far and leave you. I was when first dating 200lbs and working out. Out of high school I was 190lbs. I am not 275 lbs and I mean to get back to 190 or lower (15% body fat) if I have to starve lift and run till I drop.
I think it might be. Know a girl whole gained weight fast as soon as she started dating a guy. Last but she was chubby but when the broke up she lost weight. Friend says some women who are really happy or in love tend to get bigger. Not sure if that's true but this one lady it's been that way.
I am in a loving relationship and we are both skinny af so umm probably doesn't apply to people with fast metabolism who eat like pigs but don't gain anything 😂😂😂 like my partner and I lol
Oh you're so lucky! You must eat out a lot
You don't necessarily have to get fat but you might gain a few extra pounds. It's just a comfort thing, you eat together and even when you're not hungry, if the other is eating you don't want to feel left out so you eat too.
Don't put too much pressure on yourself. . Just be happy. 🥰
It does happen, I've noticed that a lot. And it might be because people are like "Ok, so I got this person. I don't need to try anymore." But that's where they're wrong. This person chose them as they are, and of course this includes personality too. It's like acting like you're a good person, and then when you finally get into a relationship, your shitty side comes out.. Like, no dude, no thanks!!
Not true. It's the change in activities, diet, metabolism changes as you age, etc, that can contribute to that - not loving someone. That said, if either partner thinks "well, I've got my guy/girl now and don't have to concern myself as much with staying in shape" ... then you're headed for problems.
Every divorce I have ever witnessed involves a woman wo decides she needs to get back to the gym "for herself", followed by herself seeing other selves. People who aren't health conscious and are driven by the aesthetic let themselves go once they secure their mate. When the time comes that they want to move on they rationilize what they are doing but it almost always is happening to appeal to a new partner (s).
Eating together is a convivial pleasure, which probably encourages extra calories. There is also the influence of a partner in crime to say "Oh, go on then." to a desert or an extra glass of wine.
I gained about 4 stone over the course of a marriage, and have lost 2 stone in 6 months of separation.
Not for me, because I'm very particular about what I eat, and I don't change that in a relationship. Women don't have the same metabolism as guys do haha. Plus, I like fresh, light food anyway... If my boyfriend wants to order in a pizza, I'll get a salad and some grilled chicken instead.
Me and my girlfriend were fat before but since we started dating we both had lost upto 15kgs togthr
That's amazing! 👍🏻 Keep it up!
People don't need to care as much about their looks when they're in a relationship. So they have a higher chance of gaining weight than before, because keeping an attractive figure isn't as important. They already achieved what they sought by looking attractive
Once you're comfortable with a person, you aren't as shy as stuffing your face around them. Lot of people get the mentality that they don't have to worry about looking good since they already have someone. In the case of my wife, her mother couldn't cook worth a damn and she simply started eating more when she moved in.
I think it's a thing for some people. You let your guards down and are in a comfortable place to not care as much about appearances. Other couples see it as an excuse to stay fit in fear of losing their s/o. Depends on the person.
I've seen it happen to others. I've only gained weight twice in my adult life- one was when I had knee problems and didn't run for four years and the other was due to living in very unhealthy San Antonio.
Why San Antonio is unhealthy?
Yes because once they are with the person they wanted, they seem to neglect taking care of their body as much and become less motivated thinking the man or woman wouldn't care and if they love them, they'd accept them as they are. The point is that they should want to look good for their spouse.
I guess is when there is someone with u, eating became so blissful and u will feel happy, therefore u will eat more. But losing weight comes when u have self discipline and for health concerns. NO ONE SHOULD LOSE WEIGHT FOR THEIR PARTNER BY FORCE. That being said, happy relationships can lead to happy weight gain
Well at least not for me. I normally get skinnier or more muscular, a woman motivates me. I use women as muses
But my last 3 girlfriends all gained 15lbs+ while dating me. So yes. Its real for some people.
I say yes, because I've seen it. Is not exactly love, but the sense of comfort people get that causes themselves to let go. It happens when you are happy at your work, with your family and friends, etc.
it's well know that wedding cake is the most fattening thing a woman can eat. Once she's tasted wedding cake, she will easily gained 7 to 10 pounds a year. Until she gets bored of being married and decides to cash out for the divorce prizes. Then she will lose weight so that she can attract her next wallet.
I lost weight when I dated my ex but it was abusive.
Now with the guy I am seeing I think it would be hard for us to gain weight since he is very likely to have his tongue in my mouth so...
I have seen a lot of people start to get a bit chubby after they get married. I think it's a combination of apathy for ones appearance after getting hitched. The effects of age and the stressors of raising a family.
Lots of times when people get into long term relationships they don't feel the need to keep up their looks as much. I don't think people should be doing that because keeping the other attracted to you physically is always a good idea.
I think it can be depending on the lifestyle you live with your partner. This happens when people lose themselves in relationships and stop taking care of themselves. Happened to me.
I was 165 # when I got married, wore a Slim Medium shirt.
Now 200 and in Regular XLs.
Wife had similar weight gain, but she also had rough times delivering two babies so I cut her some slack for that ;- )
Yes I think so, I havnt been in many long term relationships but what I've found is that when not challenged you get comfortable or when faced with to much struggle so you get a mind set of fuck it.
Do things that challenge you and your partner.
But ultimately do what you want and what makes you happy.
Partners will love you for you.
If the person lost weight just for the relationship and has no real self discipline or motivation beyond the wish to not be single then it can happen.
Don't tell me you've never witnessed people getting lazy in relationships and gaining weight because of it...
I think some people get complacent but like you, I can not feel personally happy if I am not in shape
When I fell in love, I can't sleep or eat well.. I tend to loose weight and people pick up on me that I am in love
It is for a lot of people. When you're really into each other, sometimes all you want to do is stay in all weekend eating and fucking.
Can I ask you a question
Most of the people settle in, stability kicks in. You do not have to look super attractive to attract a mate, you already have a mate.
I've been with my boyfriend for so long now and I haven't gain weight because we were together. In fact, I barely gain weight.
Maybe. But you have to consider that people gain weight just with the passage of time.
Life style is more related to weight gain.
When someone losses weight and try to be in shape to fit herself in a relationship, it is likely to gain weight fast after getting in love.
For girls, yeah. That's because girls only try to look good when they're single, when they can get fucked by strangers. When they have some poor guy at home, they completely loose their motive to look good.
What nakes you think all women are like that?
I have a female friend who is huge into eating healthy and exercising/working out and she is married. She has been married a while now and she helps out with the garden at her daughters school which she implemented to teach healy eating habbits with the kids.
It can be pretty sweet. It's a visible sign that you're getting comfortable with each other.
Only for lazy and/or selfish people who think their SO’s opinion doesn’t matter.
It is a function of age (and possibly birth control pills), not relationship status.
Well the stress of my ex made me eat more to forget about her so I guess
Thats not the case for me at least
Im in a relationship for 2years and i still weight the same since the beginning 187 pounds
Shouldn't you try harder because you want to make your partner happy?
Yes relationship cause stress, my suggestion is to not get into one lol
Yes, sometimes when we fall in love we tend to gain weight.
for some people yes, for me I lost weight cause she didn't like me going to the gym
No, being in love doesn't make one fat. It's your lifestyle you maintain while in love that can make you fat.
yeah, it's called getting comfortable with each other
Sadly yes but it's not like I become skinny while singkr
Yes. My girlfriend starterd gaining weight as we started dating.
Yes, when you get older, it's a very real thing.
So too, a very real thing is the "Divorce Diet"!
Unfortunately, yes it can be. Usually for the female.
For anyone it needs effort and watching the nutrition and everyone should do it.
Well me and my girl are not lazy and we both workout but I gained 10 pounds with her and she gained 12.
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