Can you keep a sexual relationship without catching feelings?

Question

Are you capable of something with no strings attached?

chackskiz · Accepted Answer

I’m currently testing this theory out. So far I realized the power of “but”. Which is an annoying, panty drying detail about the person that saves me from wanting a relationship.
the guy im “benefiting?” with, is a gym manager/trainer, big beautiful body, speaks French, loves wine and animals, has the cutest shy smile BUT he’s a bit of a chauvinistic douche and a Philosophy grad (they are either really chill or asinine, I've yet to experience the middle ground).
I think speaking and spending non sexual time together is tricky. We realized that after the hour long convo we had over wine before bedtime.

it’s tricky but necessary depending on your alternatives. Good luck!

Cynicaldreamer · Accepted Answer

Nope. I cannot even have sex with a guy unless I have feelings for him!

That's the main reason I cannot do one night stands or friends with benefits. If I do that with someone, I expect there to be some feelings there... both of us!

Ronald_25 · Accepted Answer

Yes, I have a full 10 years experience in this which is distilled into one piece of advice:

It helps if you dislike them as a person, this will stop you catching feelings. I've had some drop dead gorgeous NSA girls with 'Bats in the Belfry', arrogant, self obsessed, divas etc.

I did my 10 years, now I'm retired and looking to settle with my girlfriend, it's time to pass on the game to IGen @Apple1996 @WhiteShoulder @SweedyPie I truly do miss my NSA and carefree life as a bachelor. Getting wistful now...

Massageman · Accepted Answer

Another question for my hooker.

Smokey_T · Answer

Yep! As long as boundaries are clear up front I sort of put a fence around those emotions and just enjoy the sex for what it is. For me I feel that sex with someone for the simple act of two people enjoying each other and making each other feel good, as a physical activity giving your body and mind pleasure. It's not unlike eating a great meal when you are hungry. Your body is craving something and when you feed the craving a sense of fulfillment occurs. I've had sex with several women but only loved a couple of them.

5points2gspot · Answer

No. I couldn't. I would eventually catch feelings and want something more. I'm a very emotional person.

soleil2666 · Answer

You can - as long as both are happy to enjoy the lust and not ask questions about 'where to next' (like moving in together, having children etc)
Any relationship without commitment to a shared goal between two people is just that anyhow (but often one of the two sides, or both, assume they are going to some shared destination, and later split up when they realise they wanted to get to different places.

Good1mufferaw · Answer

I know some of my friends can, I can’t though. But maybe it has something to do with sexual experience? I really don’t know.

My best friend has slept with over 30 guys, and she had a fuck buddy for a couple of months without catching feelings.

I on the other hand, fell for the first guy I was with...

But all in all I couldn’t say

Purpleronnie · Answer

I think some people probably can if they can separate one from the other in they’re head. in my opinion it’s transactional like that though and not really for me. It’s just doesn’t seem like a healthy lifestyle but each to they’re own right :)

Sensmind · Answer

This is definitely a "Based on the Individual" issue - I might be able to do it once or twice but I would have to have "Feelings" develop and it become a romantic relationship if it were continue with same person. It would be my preference. Most of the time I would prefer not to do a casual hook up than do it.

chistonejr · Answer

Me personally, I would not do that. I'd rather be emotionally attached to the person first before we even begin anything sexually.

A lot of people fail to understand that intercourse is a very sacred action that two people do. Your souls are connected in a very interesting way and it is meant for two people to sort of become one (if that makes sense).

Nikki1989 · Answer

I have done so in the past but it didn't work like that with my current boyfriend.

Browneye57 · Answer

It's nearly impossible. Our brains are wired that way. Unless you're just dead, or heartless.

arabgoddess · Answer

How is that even possible? Unless you're a human who doesn't feel anything towards humanity

zaharaa · Answer

I caught feelings last time I was in a friends with benefits relationship and it sucked but it's only happened once

Anonymous · Answer

I think there's gotta be some sort of feelings maybe not love feelings may be even just attraction at first but something has to change for u to want to KEEP doing it with same person over and over again otherwise why not always be doing it with someone different!!

DorkVader · Answer

I always catch feelings. Maybe not love, but attachment

pleasestopthis · Answer

I can't have sex without love... and if I did, I think I would eventually get emotionally attached.

WhiteShoulder · Answer

Yes, but it's hard and doesn't always work. Especially for the girl.

Somethingwittty · Answer

Yeah. Not hard if you're just there for the sex and keep a time limit on seeing each other

loveslongnails · Answer

Absolutely !!! They're called "fuck buddies" - no muss, no fuss, no emotional messes.

Avicenna · Answer

Absolutely not. It's a good thing I don't do hookups.

Massambit · Answer

Well you should at least like the person you are having sex with.

djmzes · Answer

Simple

Definitely · Answer

I can, but I'm not interested into such things. What's the point to it if there's no feelings? It's just going through some motions for a very short sighted goal, only bringing risks without a good justification.

locoloco68 · Answer

Eventually feelings would build some kind of attachments why would you want relationship without feelings just sex then pay for it or rub one out there are cold people out there and could be done sure

yaboycharlie · Answer

Yeah, but only in a purely sexual relationship. If thats my goal then I dont open up to the person and make sure that they know that this is purely casual and I have no interest in them otherwise. Communication is key. If they don't want that then at least you both know that your interest are different.

GrunchyMonkee · Answer

It's possible, if it's mutual then yes. The problem most of the time is both parties involved have different motives, kinks, or ideas that one or the other won't agree to.

2235499 · Answer

Personally, hell no! Kinda wish I could at times though. 🤷🏻‍♂️

DizzyDesii · Answer

Nope. Im not into that. Im all about the feels. Otherwise its a waste of time and playing games

Kiran_Yagami · Answer

Yes, but only if feelings didn't exist to begin with. If I already had feelings then they're only going to get stronger.

Anonymous · Answer

You have to remember that you are both in it for the sex. The minute either of you catch feelings it’s something completely different

Daniela1982 · Answer

If a whore can so can any other girl that is not in a relationship. You just have to keep sex and love separate.

JKingOff · Answer

No, lust and love run hand in hand with me. I can not have one with out the other. I will not develop feelings for the other person until after we fuck, and I can not fuck without developing feelings for her

crazy8000 · Answer

Yep. otherwise would we be a couple or moved separate ways early on.

Lostbracken · Answer

Me personally no, although I wouldn't always admit it.

serious · Answer

Not applicable for me. I am entirely asexual. Another thing is I don't waste my time on feelings. I am a logical person.

Evil_Laughter · Answer

But aren't you *supposed* to have feelings for a person you have sex with?

GennySanders · Answer

If people can't handle the no emotions attached while being ' fuck buddies ' then wtf they doing? To me when people fuck for fun its basically a quickie then leave

Bluebell17 · Answer

Nope not at all I would have to be attracted to him ie chemistry to begin with before a sexual encounter

Snickermarstwix · Answer

I can, it really depends on the girl and how our relationship goes on

OddBeMe · Answer

No, sex is emotional no matter what. Finding someone attractive is just an emotion.

nashvillain · Answer

Yes. Friends with benefits are one of the world's greatest inventions.

Jwags · Answer

Might be tough but worth a try! Depends on who the friends with benefits woman is

xBertix · Answer

Yes I have had a friends with benefits for 2 years now it's just physical 🙂

wealthconqueror · Answer

Nope! I can't. I either love the women whom i sleep with or i can't. It's not my thing

rohit_4 · Answer

Yes , cause sometimes its need of body which need to filled on time

JHNS98 · Answer

I think catching feelings is inevitable, that is why some think friends with benefits type relationships are just wrong.

humanearth · Answer

There will always be some kind feelings. Even with no strings attached.  If you think you can, you're lying to yourself.

koolbeanz · Answer

Yeah you just need to keep boundaries and have a mutual understanding

Sir_Laughsalot · Answer

I have had such experiences in the past, it get really boring and way too mechanical after a while. It's only fun in the beginning.

Synikal · Answer

Yeah... There are some i cannot seek intimate conversations or connect with on a higher level than sex. There are some who just have the features that I would love to take over and simply leave it there. Make sure the feeling is mutual.

Slim57 · Answer

I don't know I can honestly have a real relationship and not even catch feelings anymore

Laney0999 · Answer

I feel like it depends on the person, I definitely couldn’t be with someone and not catch feelings

reniee18 · Answer

Yeah somewhat but then I wonder why I wasn’t good enough for him to love afterwards

Ripper_E · Answer

Yes a friend with benefits. I have sex with her but with a clear mind, I know we're just friends.

owens97 · Answer

yea but one of u will catch feelings

NickiB · Answer

I can't start sexual relations without having feelings for them

Chadnelson1973 · Answer

Yes it's possible I had a fling with a co-worker who was 15 years younger it. There was no attachment

Tomsta · Answer

Am i capable of it? Yes. Could i live with myself if i did it? Probably not all it did last time was kinda delay the healing

Anonymous · Answer

Tried it didn't work as I found myself getting jealous and wanting more

Alpha09 · Answer

Yes. Depends on the person though.

rsn25 · Answer

Definitely.  Some feelings might come but those feelings will not be anything like a relationship kind of feeling.

Manuel2 · Answer

Of course, friends with benefits why not. But I believe it the person not sex of the person who will want to make casual sex to be serious

Can you keep a sexual relationship without catching feelings?

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