Guys, Would you be against marrying/being with a girl who chooses to be a housewife?

[Anonymous]

A little curious about this. I really wouldn't have anything against working at home (maybe in the future be a stay at home mom). I believe in the whole women should be allowed to choose what they want to do etc, but for me there's no big job dream I have, and would rather try to help my husband by taking care of our home. Maybe do some part time occasionally.
So wondering how you all feel about it, explain your opinion if you have one ☺

No, but I wouldn't prefer it

No, and I would prefer it

Yes, but I'd accept it

Yes, and I wouldn't want to be with them

Other...

[Passinggas]

My skinny 19yo country girlfriend has been gradually moving in more and now she has moved a lot of her stuff. She keeps her horses in my barn, she is planting in the greenhouse this winter, and she is starting to spoil me. She has her dog here and now brought her tractor for me to work on. She wants me to build a coop for her chickens. She has a good size piece of land that she inherited and if we combined lands it would be significant. I am gradually slipping into this and I find the way she pampers me very attractive and addictive. As for the direct answer to your question, it is starting to look like a possible housewife.

[cloud9vortex1234]

Yes, if the guy can get by with his income only when it comes to supporting his family. Everything just costs more these days. Both parents work out of necessity I think more than Negative Stereotypes.

[Asker]

Yes I understand what you mean... My current partner is currently getting a degree in microbiology. I am still studying high school. We haven't done this talk yet since I wanted the general outlook about it from others first. My girl friends say it's bad to be someone who takes care of home, but I cannot think of something I like which I can earn good money from... I got hobbies like hiking and painting! I would not be impossible and refuse to work, I just would like to be able to care for my partner at home and make meal for when he gets home. I think making him happy would be the best motivator but I also don't want to be a burden

[SteveSmith1985]

I would love it if it were in any way financially realistic. The reality is that unless a guy's got a VERY high paying job. For 99% of families, having only one income will significantly harm your standard of living.

I wish it weren't the case, but the realistic ability to BE a woman who chooses to be a housewife is pretty much over in our Brave New World on the cusp of the 2020's... Except for maybe the odd Gold Digger who snags a rich guy with traditional values. ;)

[Shamalien]

what a load of defeatist garbage. Everyone thinks they need to live in some expensive city with a fancy car, but what's really important in life? Would you rip your children from their mothers' arms and into the steely cold embrace of the state to be indoctrinated as future slaves?

[SteveSmith1985]

@Shamalien I assume you have a "housewife" and live in the country. The reason many people live in cities isn't so much defeatest... but more because that's where the vast majority of jobs are located. People live in different place. I do happen to live in a city. My job is in a city. I don't think people raised by two working parents are quite as poorly loved as you seem to imagine. ;)

[Shamalien]

They are indoctrinated by gov't education though, I will tell ya this

and naw I'm a city kid, but I wanna leave to the country to get more of what I want out of life, instead of running around with all these sheep, advertisements and flashing lights everywhere fuck this noise

[razelove]

I'd accept it, but don't see how it's financially realistic. To support more than one person today in America, the most common jobs require you to be gone most of the time.

[Asker]

I live in Europe but I understand :)

[OlderAndWiser]

If I was younger and contemplating having a family, I would want a woman who dedicated herself to staying home and being the best mother possible.

[Jamie05rhs]

If she IS a mother, yes.

[truthbeknown]

I voted D and here is why... Divorce. You get married and build a life together that literally every single thing in your life, including the clothes on your back is paid for by your husband. He has to go to work every day and labour to provide you a house and life that you don't financially contribute to and yet you are legally entitled to at least half of it. In a separation, he will lose everything, plus have to pay you continued alimony. When nearly half of all marriages end in divorce or separation I simply can't imagine any sane man agreeing to what you are asking for. You want a nice life, house and everything that goes with it in exchange for vacuuming once a week? Absolutely not. I would never date or marry someone who wanted that and I truly pity any guy who does.

[Meatunnel69]

Lmao YES!!! Man on point.
alimony is absolute trash

[ShortCircuit]

I don't think it's possible for a woman to contribute her fair share to the household by being a housewife. Maybe it would be possible if she were a SAHM, rather than just a housewife, but I don't want kids, so... not applicable.

Thus, she'd have to at least work a part-time job in addition to being a housewife in order to make an equal contribution. But even then, I'd prefer that we both worked full-time with proper careers that pay well, and either divide up the housework or pay someone else to do it.

[tartaarsaus]

What I’d prefer if that she just works part-time, as most women do here in the Netherlands, over not working at all.

Sustaining a family becomes far more difficult on just 1 income. And if she wants to stay at home because kids, at some point kids will be gone. But then you’re way too late to have a good chance in the job market with many jobs, simply because of age and lack of experience.

I have no moral/traditional preference for a housewife nor do I inherently hate the concept. It is just often not feasible. Sometimes you have to give up the things you desire most, even your dreams.

[tartaarsaus]

It is pretty risky as well. Say the dude becomes ill or just loses the job. Then you have pretty much no income to rely on, as said woman could barely work a decent job with zero work experience

[Meatunnel69]

‘House work’ no longer exists unless you living on a communal farm or as an amish wife scrubbing shirts against a wash board or churning butter by hand. House wives use to BUST THEIR ASSES unpaid of course. Nowadays House moms just push a few buttons on their appliances then sit down to watch the Vue or maybe have a Tupperware party with their other well-to-do girlfriends. So in short you had better find a man who is loaded for that lifestyle or else he will get pissed for pulling all of the weight

[Asker]

Glad that you seem to have experience with this :)

[ineedthat69]

I have no problem if my wife was a stay-at-home moms if my job was enough to provide 100% for the whole family. If fact I do remember that was what I had dreamt of when I req up. You made a comment about taking care of some things at the house while he's at work, well I believe that goes without needing to be said even if you did have a job or not they each still have responsibilities at home besides the kids. For example he should be taking care of the lawn the cars the maintenance of the house and she has hers.

[SuperManiac]

I can't say for sure but the idea never interested me if that's her main aspiration. It helps for me if she at least has some lifelong hobby she's very passionate about.

[Asker]

Hobby like some sport or art :)? I love to paint but I don't think I'm nearly good enough to live off of it

[SuperManiac]

Painting would be fine -- she doesn't have to generate an income at it. I just like how these sorts of things shape a woman's character, the way she perceives the world... I like coming home and seeing her latest painting, for example, and we can talk about art, art history, all sorts of things.

[Asker]

Yeah I understand, I think it is a little sad when the home for some women is all they have. But as a work I'd not be against, I just wouldn't want it to be all I am! Enjoying hobbies and other things is importantant no matter what you do, and it is great to share with your loved ones :)

[SuperManiac]

Sports also fine. I have a very wide range of eclectic interests, and can often assimilate more... it's like the girl's enthusiasm rubs off on me and I take an interest. And it generates endless new conversation material... music, dancing, history aficionado, avid reader/writer, etc. One thing I don't like so much is STEM type like a mathematician or engineer since that's my job. I don't like to finish work and then talk shop with the wife. I prefer something a bit more in the arts and humanities -- something a bit different from my job so that it's kind of refreshing to think about something very different.

[SuperManiac]

>> Enjoying hobbies and other things is importantant no matter what you do, and it is great to share with your loved ones

This and also I think my job is so dry. Bits and bytes, data structures and algorithms. It's all very technical and dry, and I don't really enjoy talking about it except with people who share the same profession who might offer insight to help me improve. There's no poetry to it. Most of the people I've worked with tend to be quite pedantic and don't appreciate the metaphor, or sentiment, or even passion (very dispassionate types).

So I like to come home and find a woman who can see the "poetry" to things and put a sense of life and adventure into things -- breaking me out of the monotony and routine of bits and bytes, and numbers. So I like that type -- maybe one who can see a bit of "magic" to things -- and while I certainly consider a housewife to be a very noble choice, it helps a lot to me if there's something more to talk about than kids and domestic duties.

[Asker]

Yes! There are so many magical things around us we can often can forget about! I also enjoy nature a lot, so I end up drawing such motives. Sometimes you have to have dry talk about work but I think it's important to never forget about how many great things are around even if we don't see it always

[SuperManiac]

I like this way a lot! From my standpoint, it's like the type of work I do and people I work with tend to suck all the magic out of things. It's like "Christmas is just a commercial Holiday, love is just chemical reactions in the brain", etc. It's such a dull and unpoetic and stale way to perceive the world. So I'm often craving "magic" being so deeply-immersed in technology. My wife had her own way of infusing it into things with her love of traveling and reading and writing. I think that was always very important to me.

[AynonOMouse]

I'd want her to work enough to contribute $400 per month to our home/family. That is enough for me to be satisfied. If she wants her own vehicle to drive she needs to earn enough to provide that for herself too and whatever spending money she wants.
It doesn't matter to me if she works a cheap job like fast food, or if she makes good money. The important thing is that it doesn't require her to be away from home for extended periods of time (military, doctor on call, traveling business person, cruise ship employee, etc.).

[AynonOMouse]

I would be okay with her staying home temporarily after having kids until they are school age. Maybe she could do online college or something during that time so we would be better off later. Like by the time the kids are school age she should have finished college and be ready to work. Something like that. that is assuming she didn't have something good from college already.

[Jamie05rhs]

If you're staying at home all the time then you're adding no benefit to the relationship. Single guys can and do take care of their own homes all the time (and those who don't don't give a f anyway so it's irrelevant.). Ask yourself why this person would want to be with you if you stayed at home all the time. Key words: "be WITH you." If you're home all the time and he's working all the time, you won't even get to see each other that much, and when you do he'll just be tired and stressed out. That doesn't make for a very fun life together. Most people would rather just stay single when considering a prospect like that.

[adidas0169]

If i we could afford it then sure as long she takes care of the house 100% by the time i got home and have a part time job to help with the little stuff. if im going to bust my ass off either all day or all night depending on your shift and provide 99.9% of everything like insurance roof over your head cars food clothing etc im going to expect the house to be taken care of 100% . if you live in a small house like i do it only takes couple hrs to do everything if that and of you stay on top of it then it only takes 30mins aday well guess your going go get a part time job then bc your not going to sit on your ass and do nothing while im working.

[ikEVERYTHING]

If I get married in the future then I as the man have to be the provider, women can work and I have no problem with that, but the money she makes wouldn't go to bills or anything because as a man that's my job to pay. It doesn't make a huge difference if she works or not, maybe if I get a wife (if I get one at all) that works then she can use the money she makes to buy herself things, things for kids and we have any, just as long as I stay the main provider. It's just the way I've been raised and I know it's a bit old school but I still think it's the way things should be

[ClassicalTreble]

So, this answer dictates a lot of background questions that need to be clarified. Supposing I was the sole bread winner, I would HATE to have all of the financial burden placed on me and it could cause some potential if said wife does not see eye-to-eye on certain financial situations. Ultimately, I would hold more say directly as I make the money and could cause strain on the relationship. I don't know, I wouldn't be against it 100% but I would be wary.

[Asker]

Financial burden, do you mean doing all the bill paying? I'm sorry my English isn't the best! But I would want to help and talk with my partner with these things if we would think it's okay :)

[nathanp97]

Yes, I'd have a problem with it. First of, women don't have a right to choose to stay at home that is up both people in the relationship to decide. Most people don't make enough for only one person to be able to work. Money is one of the major reasons for a divorce, so if you don't make your own it will likely cause problems doen the road. Working part time maybe okay, but that is a conversation that needs to be had first.

[sawno]

B, i don't like daycare facilities at all so i want someone to take care of the children. I expect her to do something that earns a little on the side in her free time that she enjoys. For example streaming, making some art, or other hobbies of her that might bring in a little extra. And mostly just focus on family life once we are at that stage.

[Aethereal]

This is not a factor that would affect my love/attraction or desire to marry my partner. I wouldn't be against her wanting to be a housewife. If that's what she wants, then it's fine. I don't mind.
If she's more of a career woman instead, that would be fine too.
It's never struck me as a requirement that women should actively avoid traditional roles even if they prefer them. If a traditional role is what makes my girlfriend happy, then she should go for it.

[Reaperbot666]

Believe about (70%) of straight guys would be ok with having a housewife/spouse. So long as they informed the guy that this was what there looking for in the relationship.

Trick is most modern women do not seem to want this lifestyle anymore.

Or at the very least it is different for many couples to be happy and live within there means. Unless you happen to make a large amount of money that is.

[Shiver]

My girlfriend is the really kind, caring and passionate type and we both agree that she'd be very much suited to being a housewife/stay at home mom. She sells digital art, which she plans on continuing to do for some extra cash. I don't mind providing almost all of the income in our household, so that's probably how it's gonna be.

[Anonymous]

In a lot of families today, both people HAVE to work in order to support the family, however if I make enough, I'd be ok with it. Now if she wanted to get a part time job to help, or even for her own spending money, I'm certainly all for that and it would be appreciated. But that's me. There are also lots of guys that would have no problem with this.

[Asker]

Yes, I think i understand! I am from a lower middle class family so i know it can be hard to make enough. Only a matter of 'what if' question since I am actually very curious how the general feeling on this is :)

[SomeGuyCalledTom]

It bodes well for longer term prospects. I'm not convinced of these "power couples" who act like they can have their cake and eat it too, trying to "have it all". That said, i don't necessarily want a meek no-ambition housewife who just folds laundry and pumps out kids either. My ideal is a girl who can make our house into a home and be a real woman to her man, but still has her own passion projects or 'work from home' income, and will go on adventures with me.

[glutendan]

As long as she's willing to take care of a personal farm. If she's got all that free time and isn't bringing money home I'd want to to take care of some chickens/crops at home so we can have good food and dont have to waste as much money on shitty supermarket stuff

[Asker]

That sounds very interesting! I have not cared for chickens but I like plants so I think that would be good also economically! Fresh vegetables :)

[glutendan]

It's what people used to do. Back where was born my grandfather would go out to work the fields while my grandmother would tend to chickens, cows, sheep, and whatever crops were at home. Nowadays with modern tech it's a lot easier but is a good way to be productive alongside being a mother.

[LoU_Hades]

I'm against an unambitious hen as partner, because women without any competition tend to neglect themselves or seek the competition in their men.
For children it's anyways not especially good if they grow up strongly connected only to one person.

[Asker]

What do you mean with competition? Do you mean not having any other things to enjoy outside of housework? I do have hobbies like painting and hiking so I wouldn't want home to be my only thing I do :) I think also children should be close to both parents is important

[LoU_Hades]

Competition with other females in job.
Women who are housewives don't send their children to kindergarten.

[Asker]

I don't think I understand, aren't all men and women at work co-workers? They work together and do the same thing! Not against but with, like a beehive?

[LoU_Hades]

In ideal world, maybe... but not in this one

[Shamalien]

MEN HAVE SPOKEN!!!

Yes, before feminism took our women, and many a man's mind as well, we had our eye on the ball. Work hard, breed a fine lady, have kids, continue to work hard WITH HER HELP as a support role. She is not in the front lines, she is a medic, us men, we were born for the front lines.

Get all this feminist dog shit out of your heads people, women are support class.

[StephenCF]

No, I wouldn’t be against it. It wouldn’t be necessary, but I’d be honored if my lady chose this lifestyle choice one day because it’s traditional, anti-feminist and shows more dedication to raising our children should we have any 😍❤️

[Anonymous]

I would.
Our marriage was better when she stayed home.
We had a nice little family and we had a system to care for our child.
Once she went back to her job it got crazy.
The house was a mess and We barely saw each other.
I had to quit my full-time job and work part-time just to make sure our child was cared for.
Then she started cheating with coworkers.

[Opinion Owner]

I would be for her staying home.

[Antelope]

I feel fairly strongly that any woman I date should not aspire to be a housewife. If that's what she strives for then I don't like her ambition or lack thereof.

Maybe she'll work just as hard, but that won't put money on the table, which is especially important, and increasingly so in the future. I can't afford a housewife.

[rajesh_leo]

If she is coming with her share of wealth from her maternal home, then I won't mind her to sit at home. My sister also has got her share from my father's side and she's also doesn't like to work. If we have already secured our financial future then I won't mind my partner to take care house work.

[hellionthesagereborn]

I wouldn't be against it beyond the fact that I am not in an economical situation that would allow for that. Otherwise it makes sense and is probably the most efficient and best system (hence it being traditional).

[cth96190]

Were I to have a woman in my life, I would want her to be a housewife.
Part-time work, if there were no children, would be okay, but I would want her to choose something for which she had a passion.

[Asker]

I think that is fair. I just personally don't have something I am passionate which I can earn money from. I do enjoy painting but I am not so good, but it makes me happy :)