Guys, Would you be against marrying/being with a girl who chooses to be a housewife?

[Anonymous]

A little curious about this. I really wouldn't have anything against working at home (maybe in the future be a stay at home mom). I believe in the whole women should be allowed to choose what they want to do etc, but for me there's no big job dream I have, and would rather try to help my husband by taking care of our home. Maybe do some part time occasionally.
So wondering how you all feel about it, explain your opinion if you have one ☺

No, but I wouldn't prefer it

No, and I would prefer it

Yes, but I'd accept it

Yes, and I wouldn't want to be with them

Other...

[Passinggas]

My skinny 19yo country girlfriend has been gradually moving in more and now she has moved a lot of her stuff. She keeps her horses in my barn, she is planting in the greenhouse this winter, and she is starting to spoil me. She has her dog here and now brought her tractor for me to work on. She wants me to build a coop for her chickens. She has a good size piece of land that she inherited and if we combined lands it would be significant. I am gradually slipping into this and I find the way she pampers me very attractive and addictive. As for the direct answer to your question, it is starting to look like a possible housewife.

[cloud9vortex1234]

Yes, if the guy can get by with his income only when it comes to supporting his family. Everything just costs more these days. Both parents work out of necessity I think more than Negative Stereotypes.

[Asker]

Yes I understand what you mean... My current partner is currently getting a degree in microbiology. I am still studying high school. We haven't done this talk yet since I wanted the general outlook about it from others first. My girl friends say it's bad to be someone who takes care of home, but I cannot think of something I like which I can earn good money from... I got hobbies like hiking and painting! I would not be impossible and refuse to work, I just would like to be able to care for my partner at home and make meal for when he gets home. I think making him happy would be the best motivator but I also don't want to be a burden

[SteveSmith1985]

I would love it if it were in any way financially realistic. The reality is that unless a guy's got a VERY high paying job. For 99% of families, having only one income will significantly harm your standard of living.

I wish it weren't the case, but the realistic ability to BE a woman who chooses to be a housewife is pretty much over in our Brave New World on the cusp of the 2020's... Except for maybe the odd Gold Digger who snags a rich guy with traditional values. ;)

[Shamalien]

what a load of defeatist garbage. Everyone thinks they need to live in some expensive city with a fancy car, but what's really important in life? Would you rip your children from their mothers' arms and into the steely cold embrace of the state to be indoctrinated as future slaves?

[SteveSmith1985]

@Shamalien I assume you have a "housewife" and live in the country. The reason many people live in cities isn't so much defeatest... but more because that's where the vast majority of jobs are located. People live in different place. I do happen to live in a city. My job is in a city. I don't think people raised by two working parents are quite as poorly loved as you seem to imagine. ;)

[Shamalien]

They are indoctrinated by gov't education though, I will tell ya this

and naw I'm a city kid, but I wanna leave to the country to get more of what I want out of life, instead of running around with all these sheep, advertisements and flashing lights everywhere fuck this noise

[razelove]

I'd accept it, but don't see how it's financially realistic. To support more than one person today in America, the most common jobs require you to be gone most of the time.

[Asker]

I live in Europe but I understand :)

[OlderAndWiser]

If I was younger and contemplating having a family, I would want a woman who dedicated herself to staying home and being the best mother possible.

[Jamie05rhs]

If she IS a mother, yes.

[truthbeknown]

I voted D and here is why... Divorce. You get married and build a life together that literally every single thing in your life, including the clothes on your back is paid for by your husband. He has to go to work every day and labour to provide you a house and life that you don't financially contribute to and yet you are legally entitled to at least half of it. In a separation, he will lose everything, plus have to pay you continued alimony. When nearly half of all marriages end in divorce or separation I simply can't imagine any sane man agreeing to what you are asking for. You want a nice life, house and everything that goes with it in exchange for vacuuming once a week? Absolutely not. I would never date or marry someone who wanted that and I truly pity any guy who does.

[Meatunnel69]

Lmao YES!!! Man on point.
alimony is absolute trash

[ShortCircuit]

I don't think it's possible for a woman to contribute her fair share to the household by being a housewife. Maybe it would be possible if she were a SAHM, rather than just a housewife, but I don't want kids, so... not applicable.

Thus, she'd have to at least work a part-time job in addition to being a housewife in order to make an equal contribution. But even then, I'd prefer that we both worked full-time with proper careers that pay well, and either divide up the housework or pay someone else to do it.

[tartaarsaus]

What I’d prefer if that she just works part-time, as most women do here in the Netherlands, over not working at all.

Sustaining a family becomes far more difficult on just 1 income. And if she wants to stay at home because kids, at some point kids will be gone. But then you’re way too late to have a good chance in the job market with many jobs, simply because of age and lack of experience.

I have no moral/traditional preference for a housewife nor do I inherently hate the concept. It is just often not feasible. Sometimes you have to give up the things you desire most, even your dreams.

[tartaarsaus]

It is pretty risky as well. Say the dude becomes ill or just loses the job. Then you have pretty much no income to rely on, as said woman could barely work a decent job with zero work experience

[Meatunnel69]

‘House work’ no longer exists unless you living on a communal farm or as an amish wife scrubbing shirts against a wash board or churning butter by hand. House wives use to BUST THEIR ASSES unpaid of course. Nowadays House moms just push a few buttons on their appliances then sit down to watch the Vue or maybe have a Tupperware party with their other well-to-do girlfriends. So in short you had better find a man who is loaded for that lifestyle or else he will get pissed for pulling all of the weight

[Asker]

Glad that you seem to have experience with this :)

[ineedthat69]

I have no problem if my wife was a stay-at-home moms if my job was enough to provide 100% for the whole family. If fact I do remember that was what I had dreamt of when I req up. You made a comment about taking care of some things at the house while he's at work, well I believe that goes without needing to be said even if you did have a job or not they each still have responsibilities at home besides the kids. For example he should be taking care of the lawn the cars the maintenance of the house and she has hers.

[SuperManiac]

I can't say for sure but the idea never interested me if that's her main aspiration. It helps for me if she at least has some lifelong hobby she's very passionate about.

[Asker]

Hobby like some sport or art :)? I love to paint but I don't think I'm nearly good enough to live off of it

[SuperManiac]

Painting would be fine -- she doesn't have to generate an income at it. I just like how these sorts of things shape a woman's character, the way she perceives the world... I like coming home and seeing her latest painting, for example, and we can talk about art, art history, all sorts of things.

[Asker]

Yeah I understand, I think it is a little sad when the home for some women is all they have. But as a work I'd not be against, I just wouldn't want it to be all I am! Enjoying hobbies and other things is importantant no matter what you do, and it is great to share with your loved ones :)

[SuperManiac]

Sports also fine. I have a very wide range of eclectic interests, and can often assimilate more... it's like the girl's enthusiasm rubs off on me and I take an interest. And it generates endless new conversation material... music, dancing, history aficionado, avid reader/writer, etc. One thing I don't like so much is STEM type like a mathematician or engineer since that's my job. I don't like to finish work and then talk shop with the wife. I prefer something a bit more in the arts and humanities -- something a bit different from my job so that it's kind of refreshing to think about something very different.

[SuperManiac]

>> Enjoying hobbies and other things is importantant no matter what you do, and it is great to share with your loved ones

This and also I think my job is so dry. Bits and bytes, data structures and algorithms. It's all very technical and dry, and I don't really enjoy talking about it except with people who share the same profession who might offer insight to help me improve. There's no poetry to it. Most of the people I've worked with tend to be quite pedantic and don't appreciate the metaphor, or sentiment, or even passion (very dispassionate types).

So I like to come home and find a woman who can see the "poetry" to things and put a sense of life and adventure into things -- breaking me out of the monotony and routine of bits and bytes, and numbers. So I like that type -- maybe one who can see a bit of "magic" to things -- and while I certainly consider a housewife to be a very noble choice, it helps a lot to me if there's something more to talk about than kids and domestic duties.

[Asker]

Yes! There are so many magical things around us we can often can forget about! I also enjoy nature a lot, so I end up drawing such motives. Sometimes you have to have dry talk about work but I think it's important to never forget about how many great things are around even if we don't see it always

[SuperManiac]

I like this way a lot! From my standpoint, it's like the type of work I do and people I work with tend to suck all the magic out of things. It's like "Christmas is just a commercial Holiday, love is just chemical reactions in the brain", etc. It's such a dull and unpoetic and stale way to perceive the world. So I'm often craving "magic" being so deeply-immersed in technology. My wife had her own way of infusing it into things with her love of traveling and reading and writing. I think that was always very important to me.

[AynonOMouse]

I'd want her to work enough to contribute $400 per month to our home/family. That is enough for me to be satisfied. If she wants her own vehicle to drive she needs to earn enough to provide that for herself too and whatever spending money she wants.
It doesn't matter to me if she works a cheap job like fast food, or if she makes good money. The important thing is that it doesn't require her to be away from home for extended periods of time (military, doctor on call, traveling business person, cruise ship employee, etc.).

[AynonOMouse]

I would be okay with her staying home temporarily after having kids until they are school age. Maybe she could do online college or something during that time so we would be better off later. Like by the time the kids are school age she should have finished college and be ready to work. Something like that. that is assuming she didn't have something good from college already.