So are you saying those of us that have been cheated on are hypocrites?
... someone get me a soapbox, I'm about to rant here.
When I was in relationships or seeing someone, I NEVER cheated! Emotionally or physically. Nor do I plan on ever doing so. I abhor cheaters, I don't care what his or her reason was for doing so.
But then I might be one of those rare "loyal ones" still out there that when I'm with someone I'm only with that person and don't go looking to see if the grass is greener on the other side. But I also take my time opening up and entering a relationship as well. That way I -know- the person I'm dating is the one I want to be with and there's no doubt or temptation! Maybe if others did so as well instead of jumping into a relationship with the first person that claims they love you, then taking your time to get to know them as a person.
I'm not saying we're (non-cheaters) are without our flaws, but NO ONE deserves to be cheated on.
So why would we be hypocrites, or do something that hurt us?
I've told others I could never cheat because once you've been cheated on, you know how it feels and it hurts. You become wary to trust others for fear of being cheated or hurt again. Why the hell would I put someone through that?
Obviously no form of cheating is moral, and cheating is wrong, but yet there are so many people who do it.. from at about 15 I was the "other woman" to one of my best friends boyfriends, I can make all the excuses I want, we were already "in love" before they got together, I was young, you name it my brain has tried to justify it, but I was in the wrong just as much as hime. This went on for over a year, and eventually I got tired of it, tired of him promising he wanted to be with me, just was trying to deal with it, didn't want to let go of the time he had with her, I accepted everything he told me was bullshit and told her. It broke apart my Friend group for a long time, and obviously hurt my reputation, she after a while forgave me thankfully, one of the few people I have left in my life. Cheating no matter the age or situation is wrong so why do we try to rationalize it?
"... but most people can't resist having sex, flirting or falling in love with other people's partners."
Escuse me, what?
Are you justifying cheating because you are so weak willed you can't have a real committed relationship?
I am quite confident that most people would NOT deliverately be with someone who is cheating on their current partner. Most people have some self-respect and prefer not to be someone's side-fuck (pardon my language).
Cheaters selfishly look for their own gratification, give in to their urges / desires, and deliberately deceieve their partners.
Nobody is immune to temptation and desire, but in a committed relationship you would expect that love outweighs the "itch" to be with someone else/new or whatever you want to phrase it.
Cheating is inexcusable. Even if you made "mistake" under the influence (drunk or else), you consciously put yourself in the situation in which you would be at risk of cheating.
I really don't know who you are calling hypocrites, but the "statement" you opened up with is ridiculous.
Lots of people tend to bend the rules and change them as they see fit to better suit their desires or needs, even if malicious intent is there or not, and cheating is no exception.
These kinds of double standards are founded with either the concious or subconscious thought of suiting what they need for themselves but not others.
Even I cannot escape from this kind of human condition, but it manifests in a different form; skepticism of the purpose of certain rules due to the people making them being just as flawed as we are.
There are open relationships, there are polyamourous relationships, etc. that can make what others deem as "cheating" acceptable to both parties, as well.
And besides, if you're in a monogamous relationship then you can appreciate others as long as your soul remains devoted. A. K. A you can look at the menu but you're already full, you feel me?
But, that's just my opinion. Take it as you will and if there's anything else someone wants to construct upon then do so.
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No we aren't all hypocrites.
Some of us won't allow ourselves to be involved with someone who is already in a relationship. Some take it even farther. There are people who won't even pursue more than one person at a time. Yeshua taught that to look at a woman lustfully was adultery if you were married, nowadays we call it cheating.
I do agree it's wrong to help someone cheat, and you not being the one cheating doesn't make you blameless. But I would rather say "some" are hypocrites.
You seem to have a poor opinion of "most people".
Are you sure you're not just looking for validation?
I will not ever cheat.
I respect myself and the quality of my relationships and the trust I build within them too much to cheat.
As for resisting it - I think you should give people more credit. Or at the least examine why you don't trust them.
I'm afraid I'm not quite sure what you're asking. It could be that I'm tired.
Are you saying that people go after taken people, yet despite cheaters? If so, then yes, you could say those people are hypocritical if they're actively trying to encourage someone to cheat on their partner with them.
However, disliking cheating in general isn't hypocritical, as there are several people who are respectful of other relationships and exercise self control.
Well people are human. We have fleeting thoughts and some people might flirt but that it is as far as it goes. You aren't going to find many people who never had a strayed thought.
I love flirting i love sex i love teasing if we were to meet and we hit it off,, having fun flirting whatever we might be doing the moment I found out you were married or if you were in a relationship it would come to a stop .. that is the one thing that I won't do , I've had a grown man knock on my door before I answer it him asking if I'm Steve ,, me. Yes why,, him I just need to meet you and say Thank you,,, me for what him, for being the only man , that didn't try to take advantage of my wife ,, me what,, who's your wife,, and what are you talking about,, and the coming from around the building I see her,,, I smile and ok sure ... her,,, she says hi . me hi how are you. Her I'm Good,, me so what's this all about ,, her,, I told my husband. Everything ,, me, good come on in ,, he shakes my hand he tells me in full detail everything she tried to get me to have sex with her even me getting in a bubble bath and then her getting in with me ,, she told him everything,, and even what I made her do and then made her go home I do understand what your saying and I watch it happen all the time ... but it's not for me ,, it's funny in life how doing the wrong thing is so easy,, and doing the right thing is hard but we choose who we want to be by the things we say and do
Yes most people are hypocrites from what I have seen. Personally I never lecture people but yes I do despise cheaters. I have never cheated on my boyfriend of six years and neither has he. I don’t give my number to boys because I wouldn’t want him to give his to girls. I don’t flirt with boys like I don’t even know how to flirt lool and I only have long conversations with gay boys or middle aged men who are like father figures. I don’t speak to straight guys unless completely necessary. I know that I am only for my boyfriend and he is only for me and I will never to anything to sabotage that.
Maybe some are hypocrites but not the rest of us. If a person gives a relationship %100 loyalty it’s reasonable to expect that in return however people who are accusing their partners of cheating are more often than not the cheaters themselves. It’s not uncommon for people to project their own faults and weaknesses on to their partner and the accusation in my opinion are just as (if not more so) disrespectful as the act of cheating itself.
If you can’t be faithful, either find someone who’s open to an open relationship or just stay single.
Before anyone calls me a hypocrite, when I was in a relationship I never cheated and never plan too.
No. Your actions are yours, you can absolutely help them. I can't stop myself from getting angry at some one, I can control whether or not I punch them in the mouth. I've never cheated and never will because my actions are within my control. What your doing is rationalizing a behavior. By telling yourself its natural/you can't help it/ every one does it you are justifying that which you know is not justifiable. The only hypocrits when it comes to cheating are the ones who claim not to do it yet actually do.
No, best we can determine the majority of people never cheat. I can’t imagine cheating out of loyalty and respect, also I can’t imagine trying to juggle two relationships, I have no clue how people do it. Especially this one guy who dated my mom who managed to hide that he was married with children and even talked about proposing. He even had an apartment nearby, telling her that he often went down to Phoenix for extended periods due to business, and told his wife in Phoenix that he often spent extended periods in Denver for the same reason. It was like 7 years ago and it still bothers her that she could be so thoroughly fooled.
I think so. I think most people haven't been in a tempting situation during a difficult time in their relationship. It's easy to say you're morally good and will never do it, because that's what we want to believe about us.
no, I don't think they are. And let's clarify, flirting is not cheating unless you take it too far. I was with my exwife 25 years and never cheated. I only knew her a month before going into the military and never cheated. Even after 7 women, including 2 that wanted a threesome, propositioned me in tech school. I would never have been able to live with myself.
I'd rather not believe that most people would be fine with getting involved with someone who's already in a relationship with someone else. I've never heard that that was such a common thing or even a very common temptation. I'm probably misinformed in some way but geez, don't people care about the person they're so interested in? Wouldn't they at least take into account how them cheating would effect their relationship?
I'm a bit confused about your question, the person who is IN the relationship is the one cheating, the one they are cheating WITH is not if they are single.
A girl cheated on her boyfriend with me over the fall, it turned into the worst situation I've ever experienced. I know I did something I should not have, but she was the one cheating, not me.
If you’re not in a relationship, then you’re not cheating on anyone.
If you intentionally go
after people in relationship, you might be a homewrecker, but that’s a different story.
A cheater is consciously choosing to disrespect/hurt their partner. A homewrecker just presents the opportunity.
We all love flirting and we all love sex. But neither are much fun when you feel guilty. If you dont feel guilty about having sex with people other than your partner then you dont care about him/her and his/her feelings at all and might as well break it off with them beforehand.
I understand the temptation is for all of us but its not irresistable
true, most people are hypocrites but most people aren't cheaters. sounds like you're trying to justify your behavior by saying "we all do it" and "can't help it". obviously nobody buys your crap. i had a girl cheat with me once but i didn't know she was taken, and i was single and lonely at the time so not sure it would have changed a lot.
Speak for yourself.
I’ve never cheated. I never will. Cheat on me once and you will be single 😂
More or less. At least the vocal ones.
I ran it through my mind and have a good idea how I'd handle it with a future partner - but pretty much anyone who asks for their own space wants to reserve some space to either threaten you by cheating or to actually do it. Abusive, any way you look at it (unless that is what you willingly agree to for reasons that are of your own wanting, not because you have no better choice)
I must admit that I've cheated once physically because my girlfriend at the time would withhold sex and physical intimacy over me and dangle it like a carrot so she could exert her power and dominance in the relationship (which is emotional abuse on her part).
Over time this pushed me further away and so out of resentment I did get sex elsewhere for a while which I didn't feel one bit guilty about!
In the end I dumped her and ended the relationship 😊👌
I do not know I never did it.
Not every situation is same.
It depends on circumstances.
In my opinion most people who shout loudest about it being bad are jelyous about not getting it or do not know full situation.
I'm not justifying it, just saying we all have different reasons for it and most would do it, it is just human nature, especially for men...
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