How do I stop fantasizing about celebrities, and give normal regular guys a chance at dating me?

[creativechick]

I'm not even a celebrity and I've barely accomplished anything in my life. It makes me feel worthless and just distressed about the fact that my life isn't playing out like I dreamed or envisioned it would. I really don't know what I'm doing wrong, but it just seems like nothing is working out for me. Every job I've gotten basically didn't end well. I got fired from my other job not too long ago because I came down with bad insomnia. Now my most recent job I was keeping up with until Corona striked and although l know I'm not the only one affected by this, it just really sucks that it seems as if the cycle of failure is trying to repeat itself all over again and I'm just tired of failing. All the other women I see have awesome jobs and are strong independent women, yet somehow I'm always the woman who's a failure or has to live off of a man like a leech. I just want my own things and my own money. It makes me so angry. Anyway I always find myself fantasizing about being with celebrity males or dating them and it's not because they're "famous" or have lots of money, it's just that they are usually super awesome men that normal guys can't hold a candle to. When regular guys want me, I try and give them a chance but I just don't find them interesting personality-wise and it's just... Boring. I'm horrible for even being this way and feeling like this, maybe it's a form of self-entitlement? I don't know why I'm like this but I just want it to go away. I want to be able to date normal people like me and be content and happy but when I find myself giving that guy a chance I start despising him and sometimes even feel like I'm looking down on him because I feel he's just "regular" and boring and that I'm settling when I could become super successful and actually be in the right environment to key awesome men. Why am I like this? I know it's terrible but WHY am I like this? And how do I stop hating "commoner" average-joe dudes?

[SomeGuyCalledTom]

You're just projecting your own inferiority complex onto the men who try to court you. Why would you look down on a man for showing interest in you? Do you like yourself so little? You sound lost and confused and like you have no idea what you have to offer a man. So instead of sorting out your shit, you're making fantasies of these celebrity guys that are unhinged from reality. You'll wind up alone if you carry on like this. Stop feeling sorry for yourself, stop demanding things from others that you yourself cannot offer in return, and go find a good man who you like and have good chemistry with, and actually make something real of it.

[creativechick]

I guess maybe I am projecting. I just feel like they aren't good enough. It's terrible and I know I need help with it. All the guys who like me, I don't feel the same about them. Why is it that I'm attracting guys I don't like? Why can't I attract guys that I do like or could like (that aren't celebrities)? I don't want to be alone but forever. I don't know why I am this way and I just wish I wasn't overly prideful and could just stop being too high minded. Thank you for your answer though. I really appreciate it. I don't know if my dad has anything to do with me being like this but he has criticized me my whole life and nothing I did was where good enough but he seemed to take pride in my talents that I have but it's only to a certain point. Everything about me was basically criticized and I felt like the only way I could shut him up is if I became famous or something but I just stopped trying to live up to his standards because they're unrealistic and no matter how hard I try it will never be good enough for him.

[SomeGuyCalledTom]

Well it sounds like you know what's really going on. Maybe its time to just make peace with the fact you're father was who he was when you were growing up. And that doesn't have to stop you from making your life fulfilling and rich in experience, love, and kindness. You need to start giving yourself permission to love yourself, and that starts with freeing yourself of your father's expectations. Then you might be able to stop projecting unresolved issues onto men, and start defining your own standards for yourself and the people you let into your life. These men aren't "good enough" in your eyes because you haven't actually sat down and defined what "good enough" means.

Sorry if that all sounds a bit psychobabbly lol, but its written all over you from this post alone. I think you'll realise with some introspection that you deserve to be happy, but it won't come from anyone else but yourself. Whatever you want men to bring into your life that you see in those celebrities, maybe start by bringing some of that into your own life. The people we attract into our life are a reflection of our inner state of mind. If you attract unworthy nen its because you see yourself as unworthy. So you gotta fix from the inside out, rather than expecting the world to come to your doorstep.

[Avicenna]

Sounds like you need to fix yourself first, and part of that is developing realistic expectations.