Can a relationship that has issues in the beginning become a happy one or is it cursed?

[Anonymous]

I’ve been with my boyfriend for a few months now, despite knowing him my entire life, and there have been a lot of external challenges. He still lives at home for a short while more before he goes away to school in the fall (the college he plans to attend is in my hometown) and his parents are quite controlling and unhealthy people to be around. He doesn’t plan to contact them once he’s gone. I wasn’t aware of how his parents were behind closed doors. It was a secret that was well kept. A lot of our relationship has been trying to overcome challenges they’ve created. Although, I do feel our bond strengthens whenever we are faced with them. It’s a weird situation where the guy is absolutely wonderful; checks all my boxes and whatnot. It’s just the things we have to go through that make it difficult. Things that are out of his control. However having had an abusive parent, I understand what he goes through and I don’t blame him for anything. It helps me understand his situation more.

The moments when everything is tranquil however, are absolutely perfect. I feel so happy and lucky that he trusts me to be there for him, and that he knows he can talk to me about anything. I feel honored that I get to be there to bring him out of his shell and see who he really is when he’s not under the influence of unhealthy people. Every time I see him so happy, I see him in a different light and I grow to love him even more. He’s got a wonderful heart, and despite how things can get hard, I have a gut feeling to hold on.

Things are hard right now, but is it stupid to have hope they will get better? I feel once he’s independent, things will change drastically for the better.

[Aysen]

Based on the information you've told us, I believe you two are fully capable of having an amazing and beautiful relationship moving forward! The main problems here aren't even related to your relationship at all, but rather through the pressure and stress of your boyfriend's controlling parents. You clearly know that once your boyfriend moves out and is no longer a part of his parent's household, that complete freedom will arise and you two can have all the privacy and intimacy to yourselves!

If you really believe he is the man for your life, don't let these external issues affect the relationship. Be patient with him, hold his hand when he struggles and continue to share that love and bond you have together. If you feel complete happiness when you're with him, able to be yourself around him as he can be with you, why give that all up now just because of this? Yes, problems will inevitably come up within relationships but what's happening at the moment is not a problem among yourselves but from external problems. Trust your gut on this; it's certainly in the right place when the man you're dating is worth your while to spend the rest of your life with ❤

[ohshee]

It actually depends on what the issues are when you know somebody for so long and they'd know it's something that you have done and they disapprove of it sometimes they hold that against you and that's just not cool they need to be able to let things go and understand that was the past and not in the time frame that you are dating if you have a guy like that then it's cursed it will never work he has to be able to look at it for what it really is and to understand it for what it really is and not just bring it up because he can to hurt you and vice versa

[Siren777]

No relationship is perfect. People aren't perfect either. It's always best to communicate and compromise. To you things may seem hard but to others they may dream to have that type of love with someone against all odds. Address issues and face challenges head on. Let him deal with it but be supportive.

[coachTanthony]

Depends on what they are and if you can resolve them in a timely manner. Most couples in the beginning ignore these issues then down the road the rear their ugly head and at that point it's too late.

Take care of them early on.

[BarryKurosaki]

In my opinion, built from my beliefs and experiences I won't put any money onit getting easier or the challenges getting less, I do know though that because of these challenges you are facing your bond does grow stronger yes, you get to know each other better too, seeing the good the bad and the ugly sides of each other. All of this just perpares you better for marriage, If that is whatyou have in mind. Life will always have its obstacles and struggles. The way you confront and react to them is what makes or breaks a relationship. As long as you focus on why you are together and who the other person is instead of just seeing the struggles in the journey you will prevail.

[djmzes]

Simple

[boggboss]

How wouldn't they change for the better if its his parents causing the issues and soon they will be out off the picture

[fred_durst]

the reason why relationships has issue in the beginning because both side are honest and open , they are not afraid to face differences
as opposite , the reason relationships start very well , most likely because both of them are fake/ sugar coating

[exitseven]

All relationships come with built in problems. Getting two discrete lives to synchronize in real time can be awkward and messy by their very definition.
If two people have the commitment to overcome the problems it will survive.

[KrakenAttackin]

It can get better as he gets distance from the abusive parent. Are you willing to stand by him while this process takes place or do you want to jump into what you see as a "perfect relationship"? Here's a clue, the perfect relationship doesn't exist.

[es20490446e]

https://youtu.be/h60GUbUkPYg

[BillHe1]

Keep going, don't give up on him, if you feel he's what you want.

[Jamie05rhs]

Tell us more about your relationship with him when things are hard. Describe some examples.

[JamieLoves]

I’m sure that plenty have worked out.
Depends how much you both want to be together

[summer9172]

Depends on how much they both want it and the efforts put into it.

[testtickle]

the foundation is everything hun!

[hela1110]

It's cursed

[Alpha4U]

Nope.