Respect. It can stand alone. Love without respect means nothing.
That’s a really tough choice
I do!!! I get exactly what you mean.
Thanks 😊
Opinion
19Opinion
Respect, hands down. Respect can exist without love. But love cannot exist without respect.
Respect, love is worthless without respect.
Respect vs love and the question of 'have him and get mistreated, or don't and have him admire your from afar' I think are two different questions.
I'd rather have respect than love. I've had two people in my life tell me they love me while abusing me, and that's not love. Love is corrupted in so many ways. But if someone respects me? Then they'd never do that to me. Even if they don't love me, that's fine. I need people I can trust, who care about me. Love alone isn't enough, I don't think. I'd be happy surrounded by people who I respect, who respect me, and who I get along with. (I am using a definition of respect that means - viewing each other as valuable equals, rather than the kind of respect that means - you will respect me because of my authority over you.)
Now, for the other question you asked - No. Even if I weren't married I don't go for anyone who's 'enticing' with no substance to back it up. If they don't make me laugh, make me smile, bring me joy, make me feel good about myself - then nope, not tempted at all. If I don't make them laugh, smile, be joyful and make them feel good about themselves - also no good. It's about a two-way street.
The other implication of this post - that if I dated this person they would mistreat me because they didn't respect me? But if I didn't date them they would respect me? I'm more worried about what that says about them. That they think so lowly of themselves, and thus so lowly of the people who would date them. That's heartbreaking and not healthy and I hope they find a way to love themselves, respect themselves, and pass that on to others.
No matter if it's a friend a best friend somebody you just meet a significant other a boyfriend a girlfriend respect happens first without respect you have nothing it won't even be any of the above. So respect comes first
Now if you're saying in the middle of a relationship and two people are having problems what would she rather have his love or respect well first of all it took respect for them to get to the middle of that relationship
But without respect still the relationships going to end we hear about a lot of men abusing their wife or girlfriend and they say I'm sorry I love you though I love you the fuck you do love him you don't love nothing not even yourself you don't even respect yourself otherwise they wouldn't be doing it
So for me anyway saying all the above I don't care if it's a girlfriend I don't care if it's somebody I just meet it's there's no respect there's no reason to even be around each other
Respect and love must work together in my mind, even if that means choosing not to be with someone. When I broke up with my girlfriend it was for many reasons, but also because I loved and respected her. Later she would tell me that she thought if me as one of the few men that genuinely respected her. Made my heart break all over again.
I agree.
@jackster95 your situation proves what I was getting at. Thanks for answering 🤗
Respect. Because if a man cannot respect you, he will have a hard time learning to love you. You have to learn to respect the person you love. Because love without respect is like not having love at all. A man cannot love a woman who he cannot respect.
Men are men. As long as you are satisfactory physically to them, they go after anyone who they want because of that. that doesn't mean they love you or respect you. Men want women they can respect. They can be attracted to any person, but that doesn't always mean they want you. Then when they don't want you, your complaining about why men aren't looking at you. That's why they can look at you from afar and still not pursue you.
In my experience, men are slightly fearful of women I respect. While many men are ohysically driven, I have experienced that many are not.
I have to give men in general some credit that they are much more pragmatic and really cautious when it comes to committing while brazen when it comes to sex. Women often to the opposite.
You know why? Because those are boys those are not men. Men do not act like that if they are mature. Boys do because they have insecurities about themselves that they sent within you as a woman, that they see that they don't have within themselves. That's what it really is. Not only that, you got her number to the largest women on women anymore. A lot of them act like men while they're in women's bodies and a lot of men vice-versa are doing the same. At the end of the day, a man truly desired a woman they can get respect. But just because they respect her and that doesn't mean they want to be involved with her.
Because if you actually learn to not have a kind of biases you'll begin to see that is a bigger picture that's happening here. It's not based on your personal experiences. And it's not based on those experienced alone. You have to truly educate yourself about The Human Condition. Especially concerning not. Men naturally have a desire to connect. The problem is that this world had told him to do otherwise and that is why they are very driven the way they are and why women do what we do now because again how the world have programmed people to be.
Well I hope you learned something from what I said so you won't have to encounter these problems woth those types of men again. You want to be loved, then you need to be around a man who can respect you. The man have no respect for you, you walk away. You don't deal with the man who says he loves you but he does every single do anything that makes you feel disrespected. A man who knows how to respect a woman knows how to love and honor and respect himself. Thats key. If he doesn't do it for himself, he won't be able to do it for you.
Respect is everything. Respect is a manner and i think the man or the woman who has respect has high quality. You can have different opinions, lifestyles, mentality from someone but you have to respect those people. Loving someone is a choice but respect is mandatory i think. Of course, there can be some exceptions that some people try to provoke you and doesn’t deserve respect but i think i will want the man who has respect to me. Loving someone and not showing respect is not real love i think. To me, you must respect even you love someone or not. But if you love someone you already respect them.
Love and respect are 2 did things and each can exist without the other. Let’s say you’ve been married for ten years and find out your wife has been messing around. You can lose respect for her but still love her but I do agree that for true love to grow there had to at least be respect in the beginning. If someone is able to mistreat you then you shouldn’t care if they love you or respect you just ditch them it’s a matter of self respect. This sounds like a matter of lusting after the bad boy hoping he could be changed or it’s just really good sex
If someone loved you, but didn't respect you, then they don't care about your feelings, and they're just gonna do what they want, which isn't a healthy relationship. If someone respected you, but didn't love you, that's not very healthy either, it might make you feel worthless to the man your with. Just like @jackster95 said, love and respect have to work together. Without one of them, there's almost no chance in having a healthy relationship.
Normally when some people love someone he/she also respect him/her partner. I think if there is no respect between them then there is no love between them. So I choose respect first.
Personally I have never loved someone romantically that I didn't also respect. There are many women I respect for a variety of qualities that are different than my S/O's, but don't love. Is this what you are asking?
I don´t think I could love a woman I have no respect for. For me that´s a contradiction because if I don´t have respect for her there would be no reason that I choose her.
Both if I can't have both than he's not the man for me!
I don't think you can really love somebody that does not respect you. You are experiencing lust. Not that there is anything wrong with that.
I've loved women who I didn't respect. But I also didn't stay in relationships with them because of that. Usually it came down to their life choices. Certain lines you can't cross in my mind. Goes for men and women by the way. I can forgive but not forget. And being reminded in quiet moments of those decisions will reinforce me wanting to get out of that relationship. Don't care how good looking she is!
to your update: Western women imho don't love. They either respect or don't. I dont think modern women know how to love. In fact from the way they have interacted with me, my friends, and what i see on social media, court tv, and news, I dont think love is real. Perhaps because they have been destroyed by having too much sex and can no longer pair bond. But that still doesn't explain why so many neglect their kids so I'm gonna say respect. because at least if she respects me she's not cheating on me. I'd rather have the illusion of love with a woman who doesn't cheat on me than have a woman that loves me but cheats on me. The idea of being cucked, the idea of being with a girl who's been with other guys makes me want to barf.
Why would I be with a guy that's no good for me? Only a woman with no self respect and insecure would settle for that. I deserve both a man's respect and heart. Why settle for anything less? You're 37 years old get it together lady you're not getting any younger
Raise your standards
I don’t ever want to get mistreated. Every time there’s disrespect I peace out. I want a man’s respect and I want to live a healthy life.
🤔🤔🤔🤔
Don't you want love?
I respect a woman, but I'm not sure l love her
And you apparently go for loving and respectful guys 🙄
@Tstrbrainer Yes I've never been in a relationship with a jerk before! lol
Respect is the first step toward love. If a guy doesn't respect me he not going to be around me long enough for me to fall for him.
Respect. Always respect... it shows the type of man he truly is.
Respect comes before anything to me in any type of relationship. If he has no respect for me or for other people, I have no respect for him because I only give respect where it's due. For me respect translates to love.
A love relationship won't work unless there is mutual respect with both parties.
Gotta have both. And I think part of love is respect. I'm not sure how you could love someone you don't respect.
Down to a choice, one or the other, I guess Love.
This is silly I'd he loved you he would respect you. You can respect someone without loving them though.
I’m interested in the numbers as well. Shoulda made it a pill. I asked a similar question comparing men’s value of sex to relationship. Check it out after it builds a while.
If a girl said she loved me, but she didn't respect me, I wouldn't consider it love. I would call that fake. I don't want anyone's fake love.
Attraction and respect can be two different things. But love and respect usually go much more hand in hand via my definition. Not sure if I agree with how you titled that question.
It’s possible for a man to be very physically attracted to a woman but not respect her. For example I would bang AOC but hearing her talk about politics is like hearing nails scrap on chalkboard. I think she is dumb as a rock.
Just curious do women feel this way about attractive guys who have personalities/viewpoints they hate?
@backblueblack22 exactly!! Love and respect go hand in hand. I don't know what guy she's after but he is not interested in her
@Uptowngirl88 yes love and respect while not exactly same do go hand in hand. However attraction isn’t always the same thing is love nor is it the same thing as respect.
Just curious do women more closely equate attraction to respect than men do? That is are there guys who they don’t personally respect but still want to sleep with? I can see some men being this way but not women.
@backblueblack22 exactly!!
Apparently the asker doesn't understand love and respect goes hand in hand. I think she feels simple attraction equals respect. I'm confused by her thought process considering she's 37. By now she should know love and respect go hand in hand
@uptowngirl88 I'm surprised a grown woman chooses to cattily indirectly speak about me instead of having a thread with me on this. Because someone poses a hypothtetical question you assume they don't understand that love & respect and goes hand in hand in a healthy relationship and they are desperate for a man.
I respect people I don't love all the time. I've repeatdly acknowledged on this thread that love and respect are ideally intrinsic but was engaging G@gers in a bit of a philosophical exercise.
This thread isn't about attraction at all actually.
I see it's a bit more than your intellectual capacities so you've decided to go the basic route and project your lack of understanding on to me.
@Uptowngirl88 there are as just as many Wendy’s as Peter Pans out there. Although I don’t want to make any other assumptions about the asker (her question is more naive than bad) I too agree that she doesn’t understand the dynamic.
@coulis I’ve met women over the years that I loved and respected but I for better or worse weren’t attracted to. I’ve also met extremely bitchy women who I wouldn’t mind banging (especially rough/doggy style as a way of showing dominance over her bitchiness) but I neither loved nor respected.
Sorry for the imagery above but I’m just having a hard time comprehending the title of your question. Also let’s asks a question about a different dynamic: do women respect attractive men more? Seriously I think they do. They might not “love them” per se but don’t see many women respecting men who they don’t find attractive.
@backblueblack22 yes for a 37 year old I seen this as a very naive question.
Respect. You can definitely have respect without love, but it's difficult to have love without respect. If a guy doesn't respect me then I know he for sure doesn't love me.
Is it possible to love someone you don’t respect? 🤔
Respect must come first in All Relationships no matter how platonic
Well respect. If someone doesn't respect me there is no point in interacting with that person
You can’t love someone fully without respecting them?
How can you love someone if you don't respect them?
I can help women understand something here if I may.
Men don't respect you; they love you which looks like respect, but men could never fuck something they respect.
how would you even love someone without respecting them? XD
Respect is a social construct and on the basis of someone’s own experiences/morality. You can’t love someone without respecting them anyway.
If he's worth spending time with why shouldn't you have both
Respect, because if he says he loves you the he will automatically respect you. There is no love without respect. True love comes with respect, infatuation is without.
What love can you get where the respect doesn't come with it?
Nice to see there are still a tiny handful of women who put love above their egos.
Respect! Common sense now!!
His respect. Cause you can love them all time but respect is more important to me.
How do u respect someone and not love them?
Respect is a huge part of love.
I would rather be respected than loved.
IF there is no love there is also no respect
Both, love and respect.
I wouldn't settle for less than both.
The two come hand in hand
Then is it really love?
Love is difficult for people. Love is also not one type of thing. It actually is a pretty Diversified Spectrum. Some people are damaged and can't express love properly so it's a corrupted type of Perhaps love that lacks respect. So yes it is love even though if it's not a complete or pure type.
Respect
I get respected but im still single so LOVE
Can't have his love without his respect
Both wasn't an option you dickheads
We know, DICKHEAD!
Respect for sure
Respect of course.
His engorged peen.
Money 🤑🤑🤑
at least give correct options
Loveeee of course
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