S/he's closeted from religion. Quite sad but far from uncommon, I suggest leaving all organized religion behind as it's meant to control and manipulate you, however if s/he needs his faith then there are denominations and churches which are accepting of lgbtq.
Sounds more like transgender than gay, but regardless s/he needs help getting through this. It's not your responsibility to help him/her though, so it's up to you, I just figure that if s/he came from a religious family then s/he might have no one else to talk to about this.
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I believe your boyfriend shows many signs of being at the start of a transgender life. The gay jokes are just a cover for feeling female, as passive gays make the connotation of a woman. I passed through similar stages, so I can relate. He is very very unlikely to be a straight man and his self-hate shows itself in recurring episodes. If you want to be with a straight man, you should look elsewhere, I think.
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Something is seriously wrong. You need to have an honest conversation with him. Tell him you will leave him if he doesn't tell you the truth. It sounds like he doesn't want to accept who he really is. I wish you the best.
When in doubt, throw him out.
Move on.Maybe he bí or in to cross dressing
He’s a closet queen
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