Have you ever bumped into an ex who was quite trim and attractive when you were dating, but has since really let themselves go, what did you think?

Question

I bumped into an ex last night and was shocked at how she had changed. She was always so thin and tiny, she used to be a UK size 6 (US 0-2) and just about 7st soaking wet. For the first time ever I saw that she looked like her mother, and that's not pretty.

I honestly feel ashamed of the instant reaction in my head of, woah swerved that one 😔

It's been nearly 20 years since we dated and I probably saw her last about 6-7 years ago, she's still the same person regardless of putting on the weight, but she left me and I had a sense of satisfaction that I'd kept in shape, and she had just let herself go.

I was honestly shocked as I really thought she would be the last person in the world that would put weight on as she aged.

Obviously I never let on to her about any of my thoughts regarding that, and we just had a pleasant conversation.

What has been your reaction bumping into an ex who has let themselves go?

Genie23 · Accepted Answer

I wouldn't say he got fat. Let's just say he looks like an alcoholic now with that swollen face, hands and has bit of a beer belly, but then again he has gotten addicted to alcohol and his kidneys got affected. He's trying to give up, but his friends and acquaintances are his bad influences. It really hurts me to see him like this even though I no longer have feelings for him and have met him after 6 years. I tried to help him quit as a friend but he ended up getting attracted to me again and asked me something that I did not like, so I stopped talking to him.

The other one got lean, before the breakup he was quite pretty muscular.

Both looked way better but of course, I didn't tell them that while they say I still look the same even after these years.

sage2021 · Accepted Answer

I saw my ex-friend with benefits on Facebook with his wife. My god, I didn't recognize him. I thought the picture was of her and her grandfather. He had aged so much that he is not the same guy I used to keep around for just sex. Nothing sexy about him now. He's only 60 years old, but looks at least 80. I was shocked! He was a bit overweight, but that wasn't as bad as looking 80 or so years old.

NathanDavis · Accepted Answer

I'm still in touch with my exes... a couple of them are great friends, and they all pretty much look the same, or way better but is just habits, or genes... it was never liked they had to an effort to "look great" just regular exercise as they were fairly active, and a regular balanced diet... same with most of my friends

I have plenty of other friends and acquaintances that I know from 10, 16, 20 years ago and more and they have changed very noticeably but it is mostly the smokers, the drinkers... and those with very stressful and busy jobs, as their diets and sleeping patterns just get really whacky and well, that starts to happen, body tries to deal with it and many times it won't go well

slatyb · Accepted Answer

I have an ex like that. Occasionally we chat online. She was a 5-8 and 170 when we were dating. Today she's more like 280. She's still one of my favorite people, although the sexual attraction is gone.

Guy13 · Answer

Yes but relative as related to fat…10-15lbs for us “is a lot”…. Seen at a Ben-n-Jerry’s no more than 400 feet from Gym. I pushed myself right up in there and sat at her table.
I took an interest in her. I remembered some people and shared events etc, left packed store/screaming kids, walking, and stopped at the little brewery. I ate 2x more there SO it was definitely a difference in our “metabolism”.
-She wasn’t nearly as gracious when we were on shoots…”sit and smile forever get reacquainted sex”… She definitely changed for the Better.

HighlyVolatile · Answer

Not so much. Most of my exes are Japanese and I think Japanese usually tend to stay trim most of their lives. They have become obviously older-looking (16+ years for all of them) although not in an unflattering way, and are all married now.

I haven't kept in touch with my exes from the US to see how they've fared over all the years. I didn't break up on bad terms with those. Our relationships just fizzled out as a result of moving far away from each other and ending on very good terms since we didn't care to maintain an LDR without knowing when we could see each other again. I'm hoping they're doing well.

hahahmm · Answer

Kind of. We weren't really serious but we dated some. She was fine as hell when I last saw her. 8-9 months later I saw her and she was massively obese. I couldn't believe my eyes & she wasn't pregnant. I asked her what happened & she said something like, 'Oh, you know I just stopped caring' -- That's when I learned how fast a woman can go downhill. It's like somebody put a grenade in her and it went off.

dustybiker · Answer

Only bumped into old friends or acquaintances. They all have taken the last couple crazy years to look even better. Trying to think of one.. but, no. My area is pretty fit conscious though. Even though everyone likes to drive everywhere.

bamesjond0069 · Answer

They mostly all do. Women in general are lazy retards. The sooner you accept that the sooner they make sense and don't surprise you. Go to a gym and see that men outnumber women like 10 to 1. Yes women overwhelmingly "workout" over men in certain polls and studies but they do this by yoga stretching or counting steps, which any serious fitness person can tell you is generally useless since its neither cardio nor weight training.

exitseven · Answer

I saw her at a concert a few years ago. I was with my wife so I did not even acknowledge her. She looked like she had a rough 30 years.

ImDusty · Answer

I've bumped into one ex and she was pretty much the same

caitycat21 · Answer

Ok so what I’m getting at is you’re bitter because you haven’t moved on from your relationship with your ex so because you found something to put her down for and put yourself up for you feel good? This question should’ve stayed in the drafts.. why are you admitting to being a narcissist? I can see why she isn’t dating you anymore 🙄

Avicenna · Answer

Shocked. She was my girlfriend when I was 29 and she was 21, but now she’s obese

t-8900 · Answer

Yes and then I laughed cuz karma is a b*tech and know that I dodged a bullet

Tiptoetamm · Answer

Yes I bumped into my ex from high school he's not looking so good these days lol

TrueConfection · Answer

I've never bumped into an ex.

CubaPirate · Answer

Yeah and I thought wow that was a lucky escape

Iron_Man · Answer

No I haven’t

GMANN56 · Answer

Dodged that bullet.

Have you ever bumped into an ex who was quite trim and attractive when you were dating, but has since really let themselves go, what did you think?

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Have you ever bumped into an ex who was quite trim and attractive when you were dating, but has since really let themselves go, what did you think?

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