How do you get emotions back?

[quannquann]

Me and my wife have gone through some rough patches before and always came out of top. Since 2022 started we have been broken up and working on our selfs. We are trying to get the spark back again but have no idea how to do that. Currently I'm full of emotions for her but the feeling isn't the same other other end. She wants to try I know that much but has no emotions to do so. How can u turn emotions back on? As she puts it her emotions are turned off. I can see she's inside her head but doesn't want to talk about our relationship for too long she just shuts down after a while. How can I get her out of this stuck feeling so she can feel again?

[Malgaran]

What happen really?, she sounds kinda traumatized to be honest. Can easily happen in toxic relationships anyway for example, eventually your feelings are just killed by the bad stuff, where you have to just become numb to endure, she sounds numb.

[quannquann]

That's what she's calling it yes numb. Not going in to detail but we both have had our short comings in our relationship and personal lives. Lots neither of us have delt with just compressed.

[Malgaran]

I see, if you genuinely care about her. Best thing you can do is just be kind and compassionate. If both of you have experienced a lot of crap you haven't really dealt with. Best thing you could do is to approach everything from a perspective of Just Love and compassion. Being understanding of each others short comings, pain and problems. No judging, just simply Love and compassion.

[AmandaYVR]

Perhaps she needs some distance from you to appreciate you again.
You might also try reminding her of things from your past together, or try some classically romantic motifs, or things which are specific and appeal to her, showing how much you know her. But mainly it sounds like she is trying to weigh how she feels, and sometimes time apart is the only way to gain perspective and clarity. If you push too much, you could push her even further away.