Of course you can find love. I promise with my whole heart that you can. You’re still loveable and wanted. Nothing like this surgery can change that.
I can empathise with how your feeling. I haven’t felt it to the extent you have, but my family has a history of the BRAC1 gene and I have to get genetically tested for it. If I have it, I’ll have to get a mastectomy and my ovaries removed (but not my uterus).
I’ve cried over this countless times. I can get my breasts reconstructed, but I’d lose the ability to breast feed. The children I have would have to be through IVF if I don’t have any before. And all breast tissue will be removed and I’ll have to have implants, possibly my nipples removed.
It’s sickening, scary and heartbreaking.
Like I said before, you’ll be loved just the same. Someone out there will love for who you are and they won’t change you for the world. You’re still so loveable.
Most guys aren’t arseholes. Most guys will still love you and want you either way. You’ll be just fine.
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I am so sorry to read this, my brother had colon cancer at 34 and I know it is a bit different but still getting cancer in your 20s / 30s is very young to get cancer but sadly it goes to show that you can get cancer at any age. At one stage he was told that they thought it might have spread to his lung and calls me up and says 'I think I am f ** ked! He's now had his large intestine removed and he's made a full recovery, ok he goes to the loo a lot more often but it's amazing how the body can adapt and heal itself, my brother is making the most of life now.
Initial thoughts tend to be pessimistic but the reality is that anyone can find someone. Look at that Katie Piper, she had acid burns to her face at a similar age to you yet she managed to turn her life around and find love. She is now happily married. Don't forget there's also men out there that have gone through cancer, living with a disability or struggling with some impairment. Some of these men might also be thinking I will be alone forever because who would want to be with me. Don't forget that you have a lot more to offer someone than just your body. Surely love, kindness and genuine care and an interest in someone is more important.
Yes there people who dont have problem with this situation but of course depends on various situation for example: where you live, how is your personality or vibes, etc..
if was in your situation i will not wait for people to accept me, ill do the best to live happy because we live once, i know its hard to live alone but you can find good friends.
But dont be slave of your situation trying to live your life find a boyfriend who accept you.
by the way living without thinking of sex is very interesting, personally iam tired of the limitations focusing in my dreams, every weekends i plan to do some project but suddenly find myself wasting my time thinking in masturbate preparing and watching porn and take a shower i burn 2 hrs and the problem after 5 hr i start rethinking of masturbate again omg its CURSE!!
So yeah for me its a gift from god and sex is not everything i can clearly more cons than pros.
Okey anonymous i hope you enjoy your life follow you happiness and dont dry drugs 🤪😅
Hi Anon,
So sorry for you that you have to deal with this as at a young age. My heart bleeds for you.
In truth I haven't googled because of your warning. I am presuming your vagina will be intact. Now the clitoris has tendrils that wrap around the vagina ie the Gspot/Aspot so whilst it is bad, it might not be quite as bad. I would encourage you to talk about this with your doctors - female ones if possible - and fully exhaust any alternative treatments that might be feasible.
I do think you can still find love and happiness because you do indeed have more to other than that part.
Reach out to people here as you need to to.
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First of, I feel with you and hope, that your procedure will go as smooth as possible.
It's most important to survive a situation like this and take care of your psyche. Seek therapy to help you get over your loss.
There are a lot of men out there, who wouldn't see this as a deal breaker, especially if you first make a romantical bound.
Sex is much more than stimulating private parts, hugs, kisses, stimulating your partner with other intact body parts is also an option.
And sex may not even be off the table in the future, after the healing process is fully done, vaginal stimulation may not be off thr charts at all. And to be honest, a lot of men view vaginal intercourse much more important than outer stimulation anyway.
Don't view your future partners wish for intercourse as the main part of the relationship. Put yourself and your needs first.I’m so sorry to hear what you are going through I will keep you in my prayers and thoughts your a very strong woman. To answer your question if it’s Gods will you will meet an amazing guy. I would honestly still date you and love you the same I’d support you and do all I can to make you feel good. I couldn’t care less about sex I would just want you to recover. Think about it there are men who have freak accidents and might lose their penis or can’t get an erection and there are stories of women cheating or leaving them. Love should never be about sex it should be about so much more than that. A good guy would support you not leave you.
I am so sorry to hear this. The blunt truth is that your sex life may be a bit more complicated. Without a clitoris you can still be aroused, even to the point of orgasm. You likely won’t via physical stimulation though, unless you get really into nipple play. If you’re really nervous about your vulva, you can get plastic surgery to visually improve it. Otherwise, you need to emotionally prepare yourself for a sex life very focused on giving and appreciating him. Learn to give a lot of oral and manual sex if you can’t have intercourse. Learn intercourse (if you can) without your orgasm. And mentally, get yourself in the zone to have sex. You need to learn to turn yourself on. I often orgasm just while taking off my dudes pants because the foreplay is so fun. Clit isn’t everything
Would u be able to learn to maybe enjoy intense just kinda other like cuddling.
Cause the girl I'm dating at the moment is pretty repulsed at the thought of sex but apsolutely is addicted. To when I let her do her intense cuddling and or kissing. I'm just thinking that maybe u can learn to enjoy the other parts of what it means to be in a intense romance.Good luck with your surgery, I hope you recover and feel healthy.
I would date a woman with that issue. I was already married and i dealt with a sexually insatiable partner who let her vagina control her life basically.
I think you could find a much better connection with somebody if the relationship isn't just sex-based. Lots of men out there are very kind-hearted and empathetic. I do think there's a good chance you may find love.We actually know a lady whose husband left her in mid-course-of-treatment for another type of cancer. She wasn't exactly a glowing specimen of humanity, but her husband was a real creep. We were sorry to see this happen to her, as we are sorry to hear what you are going through.
If someone really loves you for YOU and not a body part, he will find you, you will find him, you'll find each other- but it will happen. Keep the faith, think positive.
If you need to talk with someone about this, feel free to call 1-800-A-FAMILY to speak to a counselor there. We will be praying for you.I dated a girl in college just a bit older than you who found out she was going to have to get a hysterectomy. She didn't take it well at all as you can probably imagine, but I stayed with her for more than a year later before we mutually decided to go our own ways over unrelated issues. Had it not been for that, we would probably have gotten married later on because to me, things like that were unfortunate but our relationship seemed like one in a million. The kind of love worth having goes far beyond just sexual pleasure.
Not all men care about sex. I'd be fine with a woman without a vulva, that I couldn't have sex with, if she was genuinely a good person, cared about me, and we had chemistry.
Not to sound harsh, but it's still thousands of times easier for a woman without a vulva to find a partner, than it is for a typical everyday man, let alone a man under six feet tall. (Biological) Women will NEVER have to worry about being alone, regardless of what medical conditions they have. So I think you'll be fine. Go on Tinder if you don't believe me.
Good luck with your surgery. I think you'll be fine though.I hope I word this nicely. But yes, it is possible. There are men out there who are asexual, for one example. Depending on whether you're okay with your future significant other having sexual activities with others also might open doors for someone who needs that gratification but might not be able to do it with you. I'm not suggesting you must be open to that, simply providing it as an option. I'm sure there are other options and possibilities that don't immediately come to mind, too. However, being realistic, I do see this being a problem for a lot of men. But if you want to remain positive and optimistic, statistically speaking, there are still many men out there who would be willing to be with you.
All that being said, I'm truly sorry to hear about this. I wish you the best of luck and I'll be sure to keep my fingers crossed for you.Ooh dear Iam so sorry for you. And the bad thing you're still a virgin this is so hard. You haven't even experienced what is like to have intercourse. Iam so sorry. I think you will get someone who understands you. You should just improve your skills on bed. Be blessed band I wish a lot of luck to you. Be bold and encouraged. Don't loose hope.
There is way more to love than just sex. I say just live your life to the fullest regardless of your relationship status, and remember that happiness does not require that we find a partner.
When do you go in for surgery? There are many alternatives that might save you from such a horror.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YzPrxku1x5Y
Here is just one example. Here he first recommends fasting.
Look up Gerson and cancer. Also there is oxygen therapy. As well as CBD Oil. Watch the video first.Do not worry about this at all.
Your life is a journey like everyone else’s. LOVE your body and cherish what you do have.
Trust me there a very happy relationship out there for you.
You can’t get everything in life, literally everyone has something that hold them back in some regard. Just be aware of who you are and roll with it. In 5-10 years you’ll likely look back on this with some wise and happy eyesYou can find love. You will need to find a man that loves you for your soul. There are men like that truly love a woman for their soul. You can know that the one who wants to be with you despite your vulvectomy, truly loves you. The same kind of men that will stay by their SO even after a terrible accident or a terminal illness. Men who truly care and whose love is true. You have hope because those men exist.
Sure you can find love because not every guy is looking for sex there are also infertile guys around that have a reduced and low libido.
I wish you all the best that you recover physically and mentallyI'm so sorry you are going though that. But I do think you can still find love with a man. Love is not only about sex, and even with your condition there are still sexual things you can do to connect and be intimate with your partner. You can adopt children and have a family with a man who loves you. I hope the surgery goes well and I wish you the best.
Having no vagina can be a problem if the guy wants to have children.
If he doesn't probably it isn't a deal breaker for many people.
As with anything in life just find someone that fits, and forget about the rest.I think you will find a man that makes those thoughts go away.
Personally it wouldn’t bother me for the right woman. However I would be very frustrated that all the pleasures that you should experience through sex would be none existent. Or limited.You're more than your body and whatever injuries you've suffered.
Date a guy that already has kids, or join a poly family.
You can still offer love and companionship, and that's lots.
Get through your struggle, there's still lot's of good waiting for you. 🙂I guess I’m a unicorn, then. ;)
As much as I would love to experience sex, love will always be what matters most and I am willing to have a sexless marriage if need be. There are plenty of other ways to express romance, even if they don’t pack the same kind of punch. I want to learn how to dance with my future partner.
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