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Feminism lied to women and many women that fell for it made choices that makes them unfit for a relationship with a good man. Ex. they are promiscuous, have kids from different guys, party with drugs and alcohol, focus on making money until they are past 30 (I don't see why they can't focus on that right out of high school and then by age 24 be ready to settle down). Women think special occasions are only for them, think the man owes his earnings to support her and the family while she works and all of her money is for her entertainment only, etc. All of those things make her unfit for a good man for an exclusive LTR.
More men today are realizing the abuse men have suffered by women, particularly when it comes to having no rights to their own kids, women stealing from them during divorce, all of the false accusations making it difficult to trust women, women supporting unfair laws because none of them have EVER done anything to get laws changed to help men's rights (when things were unfair to women, men DID make changes to the laws for them).
Some men that have a hard time getting any interest in them from women just complain, but do nothing to improve themselves. They stay weak physically, they don't shave for 5 days and look like bums in public, they focus on partying with drugs and alcohol instead of learning things that make them self-reliant. Some of them can't even change a tire or mow their own lawn.
Something BOTH groups need to realize is that their PAST matters. It shows their morals and their ability to make good or poor decisions in life. Many people, especially on here have made poor life decisions and have bad morals. They really shouldn't expect a good person to be interested in them. they should pursue someone on an equal level as them. Ex. if they were promiscuous/had casual sex, only look for a partner that did the same thing. If they have a kid, only look for another single parent. If they partied with drugs and/or alcohol, only look for a partner that did the same.
If someone made multiple bad decisions in life, don't expect someone that made good choices in life to accept them, their drama and problems. Too many people don't want to take responsibility for their own actions and THAT is the main problem when it comes to people being able to find a compatible partner.
Well male female relationships are just not as functional as they once were.
Pre WW2 most employment was muscle heavy. Women did take in washing, run shops, run boarding houses but female employment was more limited. Not that it was great on the male side. A lot of jobs would see you into an early grave.
Generally guys and gals saw it as a natural desirable thing to have families and it was a natural male female labor division for the wife to stay at home and look after the kiddies whilst the guy went out to paid work
Post WW2 there was a boom and female - less muscle heavy - employment increased dramatically. That more than contraception was the major societal change. Smaller families became desirable and economically a two income couple did a lot better than a single. Couples were still highly functional.
Moving right along to now. Couples are not so functional. A partner is more a life accessory now and if it stops being fun then you move on. We probably have unrealistic concepts of how good sex should/can be and more self centered on our selves than we would have been with a lot of kiddies running around.
First of all, there's the agreeableness issue. Men tend to retreat when they are upset, and make it VERY obvious, which can be hurtful, while women tend to "buck it up" for a while, then spill it all at once in what may seem like an overreaction.
Secondly, there's the expectations. No one nowadays really knows what constitutes a relationship anymore, or has clear standards on certain issues.
Third, and this is perhaps most important, as long as both parties are trying to each be on their own side, there will be some conflict. There's always the chance for you that MAYBE there's someone out there who WON'T disagree with you quite so much. Which makes breakups tempting.
I guess fourth, we focus a lot on appearance and sexual chemistry nowadays, not personality and values alignment. People sometimes mistake chemistry for romance, and it tends to end badly when suddenly "love" trickles away...
I once heard it described by a friend of mine as being like a garden: You may stumble onto it and find it rich and full of fruit. Then when all the fruit is gone... Do you walk away? Or nurture it? The trick, he said, was to learn to love gardening, not merely enjoying the fruits.
Different values, such as I am a clean freak but if he is a slob... well that's just not going to work out.
If he doesn't value cleanliness or if he says he does but really doesn't, I'm not going to be his maid and thus it will drive me crazy that he is a slob and he doesn't appreciate that I call him a fucking slob, says that hurts cause he isn't really one... while leaving a mess in his wake.
Not really a way to compromise on values, unless we decide to live in separate places, which seems pointless long term.
Along those same lines, not having anything in common, if we are both doing our own thing all the time without the other, then that is like roommates rather than in a relationship.
Opinion
21Opinion
They don’t have the same expectations, boundaries or needs that are not met and fulfilled by their partners. They don’t communicate well. They’re too busy with other things putting their relationships in the backseat and that’s when it takes a toll.
u Unrealistic expectations.
I put it another way around. What is essential:
1. Good communication skills.
2. Knowledge about the opposite gender; to understand the "cultural" differences between men and women and use the effective communcation skills in dialogs.
3. Emotional intelligence for both men and women are important.
4. To love is to put effort in the relationship. "Velle non discitur" (will cannot be learned).
5. Changing roles in the contemporary society and job market mustn't lead to women becoming more masculine and men (confused) becoming more feminine. The truth of connecting and complementing eachother in a relationship, what we instinctly are searching for, is hidden in ourselves and needs to be exposed. This can be achieved when we only 'think' and 'act' in genuineness.
6. Abstinence from what is not relevant in your life and focusing on what is essential and relevant. (This is quite broad.)
7. Goal; a couple has a goal in life and they walk together towards it.
8. Respect your partners personal space.
9. Someone will mainly take the lead; understand that 'it takes two to tango, when I go, you go'!
Women tend to be very solipsistic (meaning they can't view anything from someone else's point of view) and men tend to be beaten down their entire life for having any thoughts or emotions of their own.
That's all I need to point out and most of the conflicts between them seem to make a whole lot more sense.
It's redundant but I have to say this: Yes, there are exceptions to the rule, but exceptions don't make the rule.
All I'm basically saying is 9 times out of 10 it's some chick going off for reasons that she only understands as things that affect her (with no concerns for him, kids, or anyone else that has to hear the bullshit) and some dude that doesn't know how to respond or even verbalize how he feels about it... shit, he can't even figure out if he feels anything at all about it. Sometimes acting out in frustration is basically all he can do in response.
1.) Conflicting values and goals.
2.) People don't have the desire, responsibility or energy to make relationships work when things get sour or tough. They bail at the first chance to avoid dealing with issues and in turn find someone who doesn't have the issues they just got away from.
3.) Everyone would rather be selfish and take care of themselves over worrying over another.
4.) Poor communication
5.) Expectations are not met. Not by the partner's fault, but moreso from the one who set them and didn't communicate them properly.
People rush into things way to soon and get to involved/serious to quickly.
People these days seem to have an issue with confrontation, talking about the issues, problems, communicating face to face and really just communicating in a concise healthy way.
People are way to involved on their phones and influenced by people online like youtubers or tik tok people who have no clue what they are talking about, when it comes to dating, relationships.
Unrealistic expectations and so much more.
Relationships are like gardens it takes time and patience, you have to cultivate the connection between you and your partner, gotta work out the kinks, it's not something that will come easily for everyone and like gardens relationships need hard work, dedication and consistency.
In my case, it's that many younger women are confused.. They want their cake and to eat it too. Like they try to control a relationship, and yet they want somebody who'll have the masculine qualities of being in charge.. Many men are not very strong, nor do they stand their ground, so they just take it to keep the relationship going.. Not to mention too much expectation of finding a perfect partner that fits you, and wanting somebody to make YOU happy and content and not the other way around.. People have this attitude of "what's in it for me?" Instead of "What can I do for them?".. All this cutesy Instagram relationship expectations and butterfly feelings make relationships disposable in the West..
Women's options and freedom. Women are never happy no matter how much you give them. It is in their nature to nag you to an early grave in order to have you providing more and more. Now the Western world lives in the economic miracle that was created by better generations, women have a system that is literally designed to serve their interests in every case, and of course they're still unhappy. Why should women be satisfied with only one man when they can tens of thousands of men on instagram giving them that sweet attention they crave?
We were never taught communication skills and how to express our feelings in healthy ways.
Men tend to, when living with a woman not put in the same amount of effort she is into maintaining the household which is stressful. Women use hormonal changes as an excuse to be a bitch rather than simply apologizing for getting a little snappy.
Though I believe the main reason is really just incompatibility.
To my knowledge, the fundamental reasons heterosexual relationships fail hasn’t changed over the last 25 years. Money, usually women demanding more than men produce; infidelity, usually men “cheating” despite evidence to the contrary, and women blatantly cheating with ZERO consequences. Lastly, “unidentified”, thanks entirely to “no fault” divorce, despite men being held 100% responsible 97% of the time. And women literally NEVER being held solely responsible, EVER.
a lot of factors.
Unreasonable expectations
No understanding
No sacrifice
No communication
Behavior towards each other
Cheating
Different aspirations
Jealousy
Only one person putting the efforts
Many more. But... Everything can be fixed with understanding and effort. 2 people can move the couch easily.
Women are entitled and spoiled.
But mostly, they do not understand how men think therefore believe that men should think the way they do and when we don’t they see it as a flaw.
Men want to be left to be themselves but are expected to change to suit her. Men hope women won’t change because they love who she (pretends she) is. But she will always change into a controlling dictator and expect him to become the guy SHE thinks is better.
They don't understand each other and they don't have the patience to wait for the understanding to come.
The old adage of there is no "I" in team. Those same things you did when you were single you can't do ina relationship especially if living together. You are a team now. Your friends come second.
We don't take the time to talk or understand eachother.
I don’t really think it’s a man/woman problem. I think the issues are unrealistic expectations, lack of maturity, and perhaps others as well.
Because there is no foundation of friendship ans respect. Most not all relationships are based on superficial things such as beauty, or wealth.
Poor communication and unrealistic expectations.
When you do not have a commitment, it is very easy to create fireworks out of small problems and there is no need to put an effort to forgive, forget and be patient for the sake of family.
Jealous and fail of communication ☎️ and stupid people who can't stay out of people busy. The can't run there on life, but want to tell everyone what is wrong
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