Would you stay with someone that cheated on you?

Question

Losalt · Accepted Answer

Honestly I have mixed feelings about this...
I'm poly, so I totally get her having either feelings, lust or both for another man.
And I wouldn't mind sharing her if I trust both of them...
But if she did it without telling me and asking for my consent then it's cheating also in a poly context...
There's such a thing as pilyfidelity after all.
And she would have violated my trust in her...
I'd probably *try* to make it work.
But honestly it's kind of hard to overcome that violation of trust.
You're incredibly vulnerable in a relationship, you're lowering your guard to let someone else into your heart, trusting them not to hurt you.
How can you do that again after they've violated that trust?

If we're good at communication perhaps we can overcome it.
But it's hard...

And no, I wouldn't be angry.
It's not her fault that she had those feelings.
But she could have handled it better and been honest with me.

Ps. I've shared a girl before, it's not easy.

DaveJord · Accepted Answer

Well it all depends. I have gotten involved with women that I questioned before. But the sex was good so see not evil hear no evil. I enjoyed it for as long as it lasted. But I never got my feelings hurt over it honestly. Once you suspect a person is cheating they probably are... but it all depends on where you are in the relationship and if you are getting what you want out of it for the time being.

No I would never marry a women that cheated on me, but I would not necessarily or immediately break up with her. If the sex is good I might let her know that I know but I am not upset about it if she still wants to keep hooking up or whatever.

I never cheated... and as look back I wish I had on few women when I had the chance.

YollyM · Accepted Answer

Absolutely not! Sexual discipline is something that I am very firm on.

I need to know that if I were to travel long distance my partner would practice sexual discipline. If I were to fall pregnant and give birth to his son and be unable to be with him for those couple of months he would practice sexual discipline. God forbid I fall ill.

Cheating is not something that I forgive under any circumstances. It's a reflection of a person's lack of morals, failure to acknowledge and sympathise with his/her partner's feelings and plain disrespect and therefore character.

Rania05 · Accepted Answer

'I could tell if your boyfriend cheated on you... You'd probably shoot him.' _My bro and friend

'Depends on the circumstances of the cheating.' Me, mussing him

I told him about how it's a pity that they hadn't beaten my father when his affair was discovered when I was still a newborn... So, yeah that can tell my attitude towards a cheater 🙂

razelove · Answer

No, no way. Even if I'm in a poly relationship and they can sleep with other people, but hid a relationship from me, it's over. To me that suggests not just that you got cucked, but they're going to be open for a better option and have no respect for you while being unworthy of trust.

I did try to make things work in my first marriage when she cheated, then she cheated again, and again, and we got divorced. She already had an exit plan with someone else. When someone cheats they completely disregard you and your relationship and need to be eliminated from your life pronto. Trying to make things work is just setting yourself up for more falls.

Iwant2kno · Answer

I don’t think I would. Once trust, respect and love is broken…it’s very difficult to put it back together.

Pinay_ako · Answer

Hell to the NO! Once I found out and confronted the other woman, I was so glad to gtfo! You can have him. 🤣

PrettyPriya · Answer

I would never stay with someone that cheated on me. That is the ultimate betrayal of trust in my opinion. That would be the end of the relationship no questions asked.

There is nothing a person could say to me to make me change my mind. Going outside the relationship for companionship or intimacy means the relationship itself is dead.

I’m lucky to have never been cheated on (to my knowledge). I also would never commit the act myself either. If I even had a thought or desire to be with another person, I’d realize that there is something very wrong with the relationship I’m in and that it is likely over.

BHooper · Answer

It honestly depends on a lot of factors. One of the biggest ones would be how much time I had invested in the relationship. Let's say it was a year or two then maybe not. But if it was 5 years then I'm probably madly in love with this person and want to spend the rest of my life with them. I believe in making mistakes and second chances so I would try to mend the relationship. Also if alcohol or drugs or some other outside factor that caused it I'd consider forgiveness. I guess I can't reslly say unless it happens which I pray it does not.

Anonymous · Answer

No, i am not a cuckold. Might keep her for sex only.

Would you stay with someone that cheated on you?

This is getting out of hand, so i won't be any part of this. Better being single or friends with benefits than being cheated on for the second time.

Kaytiee · Answer

I have before and regretted it, he didn't cheat again but I was never sexually the same or felt enough for him, I had an eating disorder for a short while until the point I couldn't walk upstairs/would faint. It affected me really badly, when really I should've just realised it was a him problem, and he cheated so no I would not stay.

20thGreatRomances · Answer

I made the mistake of “trying” to stay. People who cheat on you have serious issues that they like to blame you for. Regardless, no one should ever have to go through this.

Once that trust and love is broken, they can easily break it again. It just feels one sided and like I am doing all the work to maintain a relationship that I didn’t walk away from. Not worth it, folks.

DirkCoenen · Answer

I once had a gorlfriend cheat on me. I chose to forgive her and leep going. She broke up with me the day after because of her guilt. Then, a week later, she gave me a letter begging me to come back and that she needed me. I gave her that chance, after two days she broke up again.

I learnt a lesson that day: if she treats you like you're expendable, then she is no future wife material.

Sour-rose · Answer

Hell no. They might cheat again... or not. But to feel like i'm not enough so they gotta get it what they want somewhere else hurts enough as it is. Sooo stay with that ho, hope she serves you oreos and milk with strawberries to keep you healthy.

Bob92220 · Answer

It depends on what type of relationship I was having with the person. If she was the "love of my life" and was planning my life with her, I wouldn't stay with her. But if our relationship wasn't that meaningful, I would stay with her.

EarthRealm · Answer

First off Staying implies I don’t have my own Crib secondly What made you feel to ask such a Ridiculous emotional Question thirdly I don’t date homeless girls fourthly clearly you do fifthly
Like I’m gonna give a shit to Help some homeless Girl
Sixly she put herself in that homeless situation I’m not Gonna be her was out of homeless she doesn’t get to Use me she doesn’t get to make it my problem

Sirenboobzilla · Answer

No. I'm pretty open. You want to have sex with other women to quel your appetite or whatever? Ok, let's talk about it and set boundaries. But I don't tolerate being lied to and having things done behind my back

WeirdoFriendly · Answer

Truthfully... I have stayed with a girl that cheated on me. A year after we got together she apparently decided to cheat and admitted to it after I found out. I gave her a second chance and another year past before we both decided to end things. Seeing as we both were not fully happy with each other. And, we needed to work on ourselves as well.

Beardedman1996 · Answer

No, go full cheat as in developing feelings and sleeping with another person while we are still together is the one time split, it’s never a “mistake” and you can’t blame me, if you full cheat your ass is sent across that bridge and it’s getting burned to ash, try and swim across and I’ll send in the gators 😬

shanshu · Answer

I think once someone cheats the trust is gone even if you did stay, it won't be too long till you actually break up because you will constantly wonder if they will do it again.

You could even it out and sleep with someone and you'd be square but things won't be right with you both sexually

exitseven · Answer

I always said that I would not but now I think that if she was repentant and really sorry and it would never happen again maybe I would give her one more chance/.

Càitjet · Answer

Have done in the past. Didn't benefit either of us and was really unhealthy. Then I started feeling guilty for not trusting him. Probably wouldn't do it again.

Blackcosmo · Answer

No. I don't trust easily and it just wouldn't work. Trust and loyalty is so important to me and without it we could never have a healthy relationship.

Serenitykayyy · Answer

No, I definitely would not. What’s a relationship without trust?

AviatorTom · Answer

If it's a one-time thing, and our relationship is otherwise sound, of course we'd stay together. If it happens multiple times, it's probably time to split up and move on.

BullShark · Answer

Absolutely not. If she cheats, she can go and date him instead. I won't even see her on her way out. Good riddance.

IJhonnyI · Answer

No I would never ever stay with someone that cheats on me for me loyalty is the number 1 requirement for me

Anonymous · Answer

Hell no. I know someone who did she ended up pregnant. She tried to push it off as Is. Ten years later the little girl needed a kidney went got checked see if they were a match turns out their not a familiar match. When found This out he took his own life. Plus I was on the other side without Knowing turns out she was married. I found out while she was on top of me.

Anonymous · Answer

No, once that trust is broken that is it. They made the decision to cheer and decided that I wasn't enough/good enough for them so then they can go be with who they cheated with or whoever I don't care at that point.

Relationships rely heavily on trust and without it I don't see them working.

Drumlin2001 · Answer

I'm a relationship with no ties, nope. But with current OH we have kids, house/mortgage. It's a lot to break up. Dunno, suppose I'd only know if I were in that position for real

hIopinionated_ · Answer

No it’s 100% over after I find out you cheated on me. We wouldn’t even be friends, just two strangers who use to know each other

hahahmm · Answer

Very unlikely. If they told me & I didn't find out on my own, there's a slim chance. But they shouldn't bet their life on it.

Lyndsielee666 · Answer

I did because we had a kid together. Left the second he laid hands on me though.

Andres77 · Answer

I tried in the past but she seems to have been encouraged by it so we still ended up divorced.

dustybiker · Answer

Why would I stay with someone that chose to and already left?

mb120101 · Answer

I did once huge mistake. If someone is willing to cheat once they’ll do it again

EmmaMary · Answer

Just One Word, Two Letters... NO .

BrookeAZ90 · Answer

I did once. I won't make that mistake again.

Cubus · Answer

I believe in second chance but it depends on circumstances. In some circumstances you can see that for him/her loyalty means nothing and is just jumping from flower to flower

Confusedashell123 · Answer

Absolutely not. Because out there is someone who will love me so much they’ll never cheat. If I have to wait until I’m 80 I’m waiting for THAT guy

SiberFox · Answer

No, cheating is a lack of respect, there is no love without respect.

Googlemyahoo · Answer

Nope. Loyalty is a rarity if you find someone loyal stay with them. If a person supposedly loves you & then treats you like that they’re scum.

Charliefretz329 · Answer

It depends on why and how. Just for sex and physical obsession? I can understand that no problem. Emotional attachment to someone else would be a breaking point though…

cth96190 · Answer

Yes, especially if they had invited me to watch. 😈

ElementoP · Answer

If she cheated with a guy, no. If it was with another girl, I'd love her even more

Sum1Else · Answer

Yes, but I dont mind if my girlfriend or some girl im dating has sex with other people.

sheikalana · Answer

That would be very hard for me to tolerate.

Guardian45 · Answer

I did. It lasted 3 more years, then we parted for other reasons. We both married others, I divorced. We are friends to this day.

TallAnon · Answer

No. I thought about it for a second, answer; I am not sure I would even be able to keep myself from destroying stuff around me when hearing that.

collie22 · Answer

after that I've lost all my trust. once i get hurt that way i won't let that happen again. that's that

Freyke · Answer

No. That is something they must know beforehand. That it's a rule that can't be broken.

Literalbillionaire17 · Answer

Been there done that. Not my proudest moment but hey, you live and you kinda learn.

Anonymous · Answer

Nah. I could imagine to forgive them, depending on the circumstances, but even forgiveness won‘t bring back my trust and cheating would make it impossible for me to ever trust someone again enough for a relationship.

bamesjond0069 · Answer

Nope. The most important thing about a woman is fidelity. So without that she is useless.

h3ll02u · Answer

the ones who do that are cheaters themselves

Zolly99999 · Answer

I usually cheat them to get then back then boot then to the curb

Twalli · Answer

Depends on how I found out and their feelings regarding cheating

Anonymous · Answer

No, I would ruin their life, their friendships and their family relationships though.

Anonymous · Answer

Most Girls say they wouldn't but i think a lot of them have. I personally wouldn't because there would be no point.

Anonymous · Answer

No, especially if it was multiple times and it was with both single and married coworkers.

Anonymous · Answer

Nope! She will be served with walking papers.

1GoldTwins · Answer

For as long as it takes to kick him out!

Flower7 · Answer

Ew, no! I would never look at him the same again.

Plinko · Answer

No and neither should anyone else.

Would you stay with someone that cheated on you?

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Would you stay with someone that cheated on you?

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