Is the following a good reason to end a relationship?

[livinglovinglife9]

Long story short. My partner and I (haven’t been together for that long) got into an argument. During the argument he said “on your sister” (meaning to swear on my sister’s life) at the time my sister was battling breast cancer for five years. My sister had infections that were eating her flesh. She was terminal. I say was because hours after my partner said “on your sister” my sister passed away. She lost her battle. I am so infuriated with him, and I can’t even share this with anyone in my personal life because the death of my sister is still fresh. I’ve been holding this in. I can’t tell anyone. It’s so wrong and horrible. He knew my sister was sick, he knew her situation. I told him I didn’t appreciate what he said and he apologized he said, he said it because I mean a lot to him and what I was saying hurt his feelings. I didn’t forgive him, and now I feel as though I can’t forgive him. I know it’s not his fault but the fact that he could even say something like that to anyone! I had to share this with somebody I couldn’t hold it in any longer. It’s eating me up. Please I need your opinion. I need someone I can talk to.

[Gent207-2]

My condolences for your loss.

I confess I am confused by the context of the conversation and the use of that phrase "on your sister". I've never met anyone that swears on family especially those that are sick.

However from my vantage point I see your anger at the context with him mixed with the mourning process for your sister. The two pains have become one and have only intensified the effect of the other like throwing kerosene on a bonfire. As a further consequence the only way you can heal from both is learning how to mourn and forgive. As you mourn you must also forgive him daily.

Fast Forward 7 years later this moment will still be intertwined with your sister's passing and the last thing you want is not closing your wound because of your anger towards him. Hence why I said "forgive him daily".

Now whether to stay together or not is a separate issue that in your current state, you cannot make it without it turning into regret. I do mean regret for both staying or leaving. If you leave you'll have to forgive him or else you can't move on and mourn your loss. If you stay you'll have to forgive him or you can never truly love him again. All the happy memories with him will be replaced by anger and all the good times with your sister will be overshadowed by your anger towards your former boyfriend.

[Glenn_lawrence]

i am sorry for your loss and hope in time you can find peace in knowing that your sister is no longer suffering. to answer your question i think that you have to look at the situation from what is real and not what you feel. we know that his words didn't determine any outcome affecting your sister. so that raises the question if things ended differently with your sister and she beat the cancer and was here today healthy and happy would his words still effect you the same way? most likely not. you would probably feel like what he said was distasteful but probably still be able to repair the relationship.
so its safe to say its because of the outcome after his statement you are struggling with forgiving him because somewhere deep inside you believe his words may have played a factor.

yes it was childish of him to respond to you emotionally and if he truly is sorry and shows that he has changed in how he responds during emotionally charged situation i would encourage you to not let a good relationship slip away

[Anonymous]

He sounds like a real inconsiderate jack ass.

[Opinion Owner]

And yes, it is a valid reason to end that relationship. Have you considered talking to a therapist?

[livinglovinglife9]

Yes I have. I plan on it too. I have to wait a bit. I took care of my sister while she was bedridden for a month without any form of income. I took out loans. I have to pay my debts back. Until then I’m doing the next best thing. Talking to strangers on the internet.