Should I keep waiting for an engagement ring? Basically, I've been dating my current partner for almost 4 years. I'm 25 and he's soon to be 27?

[mar18439]

About a year ago he ended things with me due to quarter life crisis he had. I had been living in a city, stetching my finances to make ends meet just to be with him. We were going to live together while I went to grad school there. I was going to give up my dream school to be with him. Well him ending things changed everything, and I moved away to go to my dream school for my masters. We ended up reconciling and discussed getting engaged, moving in together, and then getting married. He knows its mportant to me before we move in togther especiallly after everything that had already happened in the past. This conversation was over a year ago and he said money was why he hadn't proposed yet. It has been a year now and I come to find out he has not even started saving. Im not the type of person who is into jewerly, but he feels he needs to spend a decent amount of money. I'm the type of person thatd probably be okay if it was ring pop, just knowng we will spend our lives together would make me happy. Thats fine but, he acquired mass debt over the year and has not saved a single penny over 14th months since we discussed this. I'm getting to a point where I really want to move on with my life because I mean I don't even see him that many times a year due to the long distance. He always voices money as the reason but my parents where i moved back home to even offered to help. they offered him to live rent free and even to have my dads old car in benefit to our future and he was not okay with it and did not want to have any part with living with them. I just don't know anymore if I should wait or if he is after something and some perfect vision that is not feasible or might be years away. I'm just really upset because it just feels like all the little things seem to more important than actually just being with me or spending the rest of our lives together. I just feel like time is wasting now as I'm ready to move on.

[MrOracle]

If marrying you was his priority, I *promise* you that he'd be acting VERY differently. Even if his circumstances were terrible and he HAD to spend his money on other things, he'd have been on the phone with you about it, reluctant to divert that money, and trying to find some way to earn it back.

His actions tell you quite clearly that he's in no hurry to be married. There's ALWAYS a good reason to not get married if you don't want to be married, and clearly you're not demanding a high lifestyle right out of the gate - presumably he's going to school for a career that has real earnings potential, so you'd be willing to be poor for a few years until he got things going.

You need to face the fact that marriage is a low priority (at best) to him, and YOUR time is rapidly ticking away, along with your fertility. You don't have time to wait for years. In other words, the two of you are clearly on different paths in life, and the sooner you stop pretending otherwise, the sooner you can find a man who is on the same path as yours. He has the luxury of time - you do not.

[Sixgunsound]

Time is absolutely wasting, and yours is running out. He will have his pick of the litter when he turns 30 has a decent job and is finally making decent money. It works a little differently for women to turn 30. I don’t make the rules I just explain them.

[Sixgunsound]

Thanks for MHO

[DubiousIntentions]

Ok, this is just my opinion, but to me it seems like he doesn't want to get married, or maybe just not to you. Let me ask you this. How do you know he is not dating any other girls, since he is not close by where you might be able to notice, and that he could get away with? Who, or what, is he spending all his money on? Is he actually working a full-time job? Is he actually playing you for a sucker? Why do you even want to get married to this guy? Because it seems to me that you are not his number one focus in life. The fact that he doesn't want to be around your family is a big red flag. If I were you, I would rethink about what you are getting out of this relationship.

[LazerBean]

If a man wants to marry you, you will KNOW it without a doubt, and he will be working to get things done very quickly. Personally, I would have moved on quite a while ago.

[DubiousIntentions]

Hear hear!

[Sixgunsound]

My wife never had any doubt that I wanted to marry her 10 years ago. Guys that play stupid games win stupid prizes, like loneliness.

[WhitneySnow]

You need to find a boyfriend who is better at managing money and who actually saves for your engagement ring

[Guy13]

Never happening 💍

[Guy13]

If we believe we secure and 2 years would be a long wait. Process starts 1.5 to complete engagement by 2 years.

[mymommyhateame]

DROP HIM NOW BESTIE !!