When someone says they like you or they love you, but you don’t feel the same. How do you respond or what do you say?

Question

William7489 · Accepted Answer

It’s sort of depends. If you just have no interest in them, let’s face it it’s going to be a difficult conversation. I usually say something like, “that means so much to me, I care deeply for you too, but the feelings I have for you are not as romantic in nature. I want us to be friends and in the future if something comes from that, let’s go ahead and let that happen but for now let’s be friends rather than force the issue.“ You trying to let a person of easy though acknowledging the friendship and how much it means to you, and that you care for them but not in the same way at this time. It’s never easy but you are better off dealing with it right away then stringing somebody along.

KittyBox · Accepted Answer

Ask them why they love you, if you say you love someone, but you can't give a reason besides, "you're cute" or "you're really pretty", then you're just shallow in my opinion, as a rule of thumb it's best to get to know someone first so you know a little about them before saying the L card, but I digress.

Generally if they can give me a reason that makes me think "that's sweet" or "she's thought about this" I'll go on the date and see where it leads me, but if I don't feel anything I'll let them know and tell them that I tried at the very least.

jennifer_bloom · Accepted Answer

A generic dismissal of a relationship is the softest blow you can give. I knew a very disabled guy who found a woman that wanted to marry him so she could obtain Canadian citizenship and food and shelter by a host family in Canada but after she realized how severe his disability was, she realized she could not go through with the wedding.

She lied and told him she did not want to relocate because her parents would be lonely and they had different professions so she did not believe their world views were compatible and those differences might interfere with their ability to raise a family together. Abstract dismissals are the easiest ones you can give somebody that you're rejecting.

RomaTaker · Accepted Answer

I respond honestly and politely as possible so I don’t hurt their feelings, just tell them that’s you don’t feel the same and it’s not them it’s just you didn’t feel the chemistry with them but you like them as a friend

ObscuredBeyond · Answer

I almost never have this problem. And from there, I usually cut and run the second the words "I need some help," slip her lips, if they're immediately followed by the words "Western Union."

The other quick way to make me run, is to say"baby" when we barely know each other. And if she asks for an iTunes card out of nowhere, I make myself scarce.

If not, I try to find the best way to let her down easy. I don't want to give her false hope, but I don't want to be an asshole either.

Cecinene · Answer

I will say that I'm not ready for any relationship.

This exactly happened between I and my bestie, he told me that he loves me and I told him that I'm not ready for any relationship, then he said that he is not actually forcing me to do what I don't like.

Actually I once had feelings for him but when I noticed that he was with someone, I allowed him to be and dismissed every feelings I had for him. It sucks when he told me that he wants to date me, it was very very funny that day.

So I guess you just tell the person that you are not interested in them for that moment or if you don't want them at all just tell them that you don't want to see them again, and they will be able to leave you for good.

Chelsdope0 · Answer

It’s always best to be honest without hurting feelings. Simply saying you don’t feel the same will be okay.

I just experienced rejection but he was honest with me and did take my well being into consideration. I had deep feelings for him but he didn’t want a relationship. (Maybe not with me)

Rejection can be absolutely painful for some.. it was for me. I even developed suicidal thoughts because I felt a lot of rejection as a child. I felt like something was wrong with me. You just never know what people go through.

you don’t owe the person you’re rejecting anything but just be kind and honest. If they don’t respond well take further action.

Gloree · Answer

I didn't really love my boyfriend when he first started coming for me. But I liked him.

So I said yes because I wanted to experience what being in a relationship feels like. Prior to now I've never dated a guy. He is my first and we met last year.

Anyway when we started going out he will tell me "I love you." I usually smile and say nothing because I didn't want to lie. Sometimes I responded with "Thanks" or "That's great to know."

He never complained. He was patient. He had pursued me for quite a while and was convinced I will fall in love with him along the line. He knew I got into the relationship without love so he understood but he kept saying it.

And truly, I came to fall head over heels in love with him. And now I say it back. Sometimes I say it first and now he teases me about it. It's so cool.

ZackBan · Answer

I think a hard blow is the most respectable thing you can do.
Most people saying "let him down easy" would hate being let down the same with many false signals and potential hope for a future.

Just say "look I know it takes courage to day what you said and I respect you for it. But I don't feel the same way. I'm sure you'll find someone who does"

That way it's not insulting but also a hard no

Topaz1979 · Answer

I say I love them as well as a friend or brother this way it becomes a family zone or a friendzone and they usually understand exactly what i mean. it's not romantic love it's friendship or brotherly love so it shows that i have no interest in perusing a romantic relationship with them.

mobiusforniner · Answer

in my experience, these three words, if said with real intent and meaning, cause women to fall flat, start floundering, twitching and foaming at the mouth. Its like putting on brass knuckles and punching her square in her heart.

It sucks because there's really no verbal confirmation of my feelings. Just a gobbly mess of mangled female who, quite often, lies motionless in a pool of tears, unable to process the emotion in return.

UnknownSwede · Answer

It has only happend once that someone, who I knew in real life, genuinely said that to me and even though I did like spending time with them I didn't know how I felt so I think I scared them away by a lack of response.

She passed away just a couple of years later so we never got any closure and sometimes it can eat me up from the inside.

NathanDavis · Answer

learned it early... well, since middle-school days, best to let them know quick, short and as kindly as possible, lol I'm sorry but unfortunately, I don't feel the same (=

Summeroflove · Answer

It depends. But I try and be truthful. As long as someone is a good person and not a degenerative weirdo. I can like and love pretty easily.

I love my family. But don’t agree with some stuff some of them do

The_Shadow_Dweller · Answer

I like the image! Since it has not happened to me, I would remain quiet in response.

But I think remaining quiet will be much more destructive than saying something. Anything. I don't know. I guess I will look at other opinions.

DermalPunch · Answer

It depends. If it's someone I don't have an actual relationship with and it's a nicety I'll just say me too.  But if the person clearly has expectations then I will say thank you and not reciprocate.

Ill_made_Knight · Answer

Something along the lines of "That's very sweet, I almost wish I felt the same way, but it's just not there for me" No need to be cruel, but that also means leaving no doubt.

DoctorSex · Answer

Women have told me this my whole life.

I've become wiser in how I respond. I usually investigate how they define "love for me".

I've learnt that most women, not all. Weaponize the word love to disarm a man. If you press them to expand, there's salt nothing solid behind it, just something they felt like saying in the moment based off a "feeling".

Well feelings come and go. Love is not a feeling.

Kind regards,

DoctorSex

BlueScorpio · Answer

Just say thank you for being honest, but I unfortunately don't feel the same way. I'm sure you meet the right one in time.

Babybebe15 · Answer

“Thank you”  “Aww, that’s sweet”  “I like you” “I like you too” Hug them  Rest your head on their shoulder

Bethany22 · Answer

Talk is cheap. Unless they are wasting their time moving mountains for me, I just thank them for the compliment and move on

GoodGuyBreakingBad · Answer

Just say sorry "I only can be friends"

Jltakk · Answer

I never had the luxury of having that happen outside of family. If a girl told me that, I'd question her sanity.

dustybiker · Answer

“Okay.. How do I say this without offending? I don’t feel the same way.”

Loveisgirthy · Answer

My now newly added cousin of 7 or 8yrs old apparently has that awkward crush thing for me I found out by her sister. Anyway been dreading this situation ever coming up through the holidays. Then there's been plenty of times I had to decline or avoid attention towards known crushes. All could've been better handled upfront.

letuswaltzforthedead · Answer

The last time that happened I just said "cool". It was awkward.

DeeDeeDeVour · Answer

"Thank you. I hope that's a brotherly/sisterly kind of love."

PamelaRivers · Answer

Not had it happen yet so not sure how I'd respond.

exitseven · Answer

I would say that I lie them but maybe not the way i was supposed to. One time i told this girl I loved her, she said i was crazy.

mohammed93alaa · Answer

I will say " ok , but i don't ! "  Of course it hurts, but it will be fast and once , its better than going around for days, and make the people hanging for while!!

AddylynnNightingale · Answer

I'll say "thank you" or "I know"

Jamie05rhs · Answer

I guess I would just tell them that I don't think of them in that way.

Avatar74 · Answer

I would have to tell them the truth that I didn't feel the same. Although it may hurt them, I couldn't lead someone down the garden path and pretend I had strong feelings for them.

JustiReno · Answer

Set them up on a date with a police to serve then a restraining order 😒

DancingQueen16 · Answer

I'd tell them I'm flattered but I just don't like them in that way

andreasderjuengere · Answer

My standard response is: ''Me, too'' I haven't gotten slapped for it until now :)

Havthrills · Answer

Kind of like the meme. Lol. Or "thank you," "aww that's sweet"

AsaKyo · Answer

I'd probably be flattered, but tell them I don't like them that way

TrillXHippy · Answer

I don’t know how to respond or what to say to something that I rarely ever hear from a girl lol

Smartman5 · Answer

I don't know, it's very difficult for me. I don't want to upset her, but if I don't like her, there's nothing me can do

altaboy · Answer

"I know." Hey, it worked for Han Solo.

Izza101 · Answer

My guy friend liked me and I told them “I’m sorry I don’t.”

MrCage · Answer

I would tell them the truth. I would never go with it cause that would cause way more pain to them.

smilelots · Answer

there is only one way to respond that is with the truth always be honest and sincere.

LivingExample · Answer

Honesty is Always the best policy. If you do not feel the same way you need to let that person know!

dragoblack · Answer

I awkwardly apologize and say "sorry, but i just don't feel the same way about you"

Zolly99999 · Answer

I will tell them right away gently of course so I don't lead them on. It's not fair to them..

ItsYouBabe · Answer

that’s really scary, esp when you feel really bad and u don’t wanna give the person the “your not good enough vibe.”

RavVid · Answer

I wouldn't let it get to that point unless the sex was really good despite me not liking them.

manix2022 · Answer

They want to experience if you can satisfy their sexual hunger to fantasy or fetish.  Ask them what they will like to do to you?

Arunhello1986 · Answer

Sorry buddy, No one says too me, I don’t know how to respond to back 🙇‍♂️,

BLP11520 · Answer

It's been so long ago, usually I got the short end of the stick

Avicenna · Answer

You’d better be completely honest with them

ChiTown33 · Answer

Never had this problem.

spartan55 · Answer

How bout those Eagles?

Pleaznhim4me · Answer

Thank you. That is such a kind thing to say.

twotone54 · Answer

I don't know I always found it polite to say something like I lust you.🤓

Part2603 · Answer

"Wut? Why?"

AviatorTom · Answer

Just accept it, say nothing.

pizzalovershouse · Answer

I just say I love you music choices

qwert1234 · Answer

"Thank you".

BlurryHaze · Answer

Other bird should have said "I didn't ask". 😂

Onashir · Answer

You say I love you and you wink 😉

Fuentes · Answer

So u tryna fuck or nah

When someone says they like you or they love you, but you don’t feel the same. How do you respond or what do you say?

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