I feel like my abandonment issues mess up my relationships? How do I control my emotions any good tips?

[Anonymous]

Whenever I feel a sense of abandonment I get hardcore anxiety very hardcore. And I end up just sending emotional texts when I’m stressing about it. Is there any ways to help this.

[lightbulb27]

sure, you were traumatized as a child and you need to deal with that trauma. there's lots of techniques out there, time to start studying up.

You can't control your emotions, you are your emotions. You can re-wire your emotions so they work better for you. Lucky for you, you already know one trauma (which is just emotional conditioning) impacting you. There are many things that can distort our behavior and there's tools to find them or we find them as we get into relationships and encounter challenges.

Start watching videos or reading books on how to recover from trauma and abandonment and go from there. If there was support groups, that be good. Good diet, meditation help in general. You have to want to change and put effort into re-wiring your sub conscious mind/response.

The best method I know ontop my head is to raise the past in your mind and put it in perspective. You were a child, it wasn't your fault, things you interpreted as a child were not true... lies... and you correct those lies in your heart. Let God/love in to let that go. Repeat.

Affirmations that you are ok.

Lastly... slowing down any emotional response is key.. take a break, breathe, write down or... then respond.

Stay away from drugs, they are just masks and temporary and make other problems. heal your inside response.

you can do it! we all have to do it, some are just worse than others. Lastly, there's power in healing... you'll get to a new place, find new you that didn't' exist and new opportunities and gifts in your spirit you didn't know existed. The power of freedom is your reward!

[chicosuave]

i can handle any girl but when they start throwing tantrums then i get annoyed as hell.

[CA4444]

I had this problem too… You can’t technically ‘control’ your emotions, just don’t act on it if you feel bad, what really helped me was to somehow realised that what I needed (not what I wanted unfortunately) was to be truly alone and walk alone in this life for some time… no man, whatsoever, like rehab… and also I believe in my case it was caused by some traumas which resulted in an inability to truly trust and open up to someone, especially those I liked or wanted the most… (yes not just abandonment fears) which is the bigger issue. just ask yourself this question, if your are being really yourself and authentic in this relationship. Anyway you may have a different problem, good luck

[boggboss]

Therpy

[In_Trance]

seek therapy