Is it overwhelming when your new partner tells you about an old one?

[lilyanony1]

You're talking about relationships and how things ended... But do you want to know or do you listen because it's part of the process?

[Summeroflove]

I suppose at some point in a relationship you just talk about stuff. If someone starts off telling me how bad their ex is…. It’s like someone telling their future employer at a job interview how much they hated their old jobs.

You figure. Oh boy…. I’m gonna be the next one. But if it’s later on. I don’t have a problem with it.

[NathanDavis]

nope, never had an issue with knowing more and knowing better... about the one I love

but of course, these kind of conversations... when and if they happened, had reasons to be and the proper context and circumstance, nothing weird or sketchy about it

[dustybiker]

No. I’m mature enough to realize it’s a part of who he was and is. Doesn’t mean anything if he is choosing to be with me.

[CA4444]

I want to know if he wants to share but better to share these things when both partners are secure I guess…

[D_Bone_Steak]

It's important to listen. If all they have to tell you is that all their past partners were pieces of shit, then you should be seeing red flags all over the place.

[Chazmatazz269]

It’s only overwhelming if they are obsessed with an ex; can’t stop talking about them and shared experiences, and comparing me to them. That’s a major red flag and i bounce at the first sign.

[lilyanony1]

I don't compare but I've slowly been telling this guy about my ex as its quite traumatic for me.
I endured a lot because I loved him. And other things going on around me allowed me to miss things or play them down as I was so preoccupied.
I know he hasn't asked but I feel like I needed to tell him as he was telling me why he's not been in love since the first love where he got his heartbroken

[Andres77]

nope, i always enjoyed hearing about older relationships. it helped me figure out what the girl preferred and what the guy did wrong and helped me pinpoint how i could please her better.

[Andres77]

It’s like finding out why the last employee was fired. If I wanna last in this relationship then don’t do what the last guy did. OR…are her expectations even reasonable?
Did he have any clever tricks in bed that she really liked?
There’s SO much good information in her old relationships. I just don’t understand why people would rather be blind to the truth.

[GoodGuyBreakingBad]

Yes, it's terrible when a new partner tells me about an old relationship.

[menina]

I have no experience with this but I would want to know.

[AimeeKyle]

No. I think it can be interesting and fun…. as long as both can share past stories and learn from each other’s past…. and maybe even do similar past experiences

[Massageman]

It's the 157th time that gets a bit tedious.

[exitseven]

no but it gets tiresome if she talks about him all the time.

[Bklynbadboy12]

It's not overwhelming at all to me I ask cause I want to know but that was before I came into the picture so why would that bother me plus there with me now so that person couldn't be that great right

[PatriceONeal]

They aren't over their ex if they aren't over their ex, they aren’t over their ex.

[sassy_receptor]

no i really don’t care for the most part

[TacosRAwesome]

Depends on what they tell me.

[lilyanony1]

What have you been told?

[TacosRAwesome]

I don't mind being told things like where they went etc but I had any implications that feelings might still be there.

[lilyanony1]

I understand

[FunkyMonkee]

I see nothing wrong with talking about it.