I think the obvious answer is ”stop ghosting” but almost people never seem to realize I don’t do it because I consciously want to hurt the person I just get awful anxiety which can manifest in extreme fear to complete disinterest and it feels impossible to stay. It’s ruined good chances I’ve had a relationships and hurt some really good guys. Before honestly my friends or I could convince myself I was justified or it was just apart of being young but, I’ve come to point I’ve had to confront I really fucked up.
I want real love and I want to love someone fully and genuinely. I’ve apologized to almost all the guys, I’ve been rejected in the same way I’ve rejected these guys, I’ve accepted my karma and put in effort into better. I’ve worked on my communication and sitting in discomfort too actually see change. For now I’ve completely banned pursuing or engaging with interested men because I’m genuinely not fit for a relationship at the moment, but I want to be.
To people who struggle with not running away how did you break the pattern? How did you get comfortable with focusing on yourself and not prioritizing constant new love interests and dating?
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Counseling and it requires every moment focus. Counselor provides strategies and walk through.
“How did you get comfortable with focusing on yourself and not prioritizing constant new love interests and dating?”
This line stuck out to me a lot, because what about focusing on yourself makes you uncomfortable? Serial dating can be a sign of so many internal struggles, like fear of loneliness, fear of being dumped so you strike first, concerns of getting too close or getting your heart broken. Even fear of missing out, like if your friends are in serious relationships and/or have kids, and you don’t want to be left behind. So many things. That’s why you should use this time as a single person to figure out what triggers you to ghost, and heal it.
Delete all social media and date in reality. As long as you have the hoe culture phone apps you'll never get away. You're addicted.