Guys, Are you unlucky at love?

[Gummy_Cluster]

I've been fortunate enough to have three true loves. They were all very wealthy, and put me in their wills. The first two died from eating poisonous mushrooms. But the third true love died from severe head trauma.

[Shamalien]

Things haven’t been the greatest but I’m not about to start whining about it. The one woman who truly loved me I did not feel a strong enough attraction to to have a serious ltr. I always hold respect for that one brilliant soul in my heart though to the point where I can cry just thinking about her. She had issues sure but she improved so much. I wish I could contact her again just to see how she’s doing and boost her self esteem in any way possible, but I fear I cannot because we might end up slipping back under the sheets and get trapped in a toxic cycle

[Gummy_Cluster]

Always listen to your gut. It's the best friend you have.

[Lionman95]

Yes I am. I´ve never been in a relationship. I some would want to be in one, but at the same time I don´t have the options to find them offline and I don´t want to start online because I didn´t have luck there either.
At other times I´m ok being single and acknowledging that may be not attractive for a relationship.

[Gummy_Cluster]

There's someone for everyone. I've told the story on this site about the Korean boy I was tutoring. He was physically handicapped, and hornier than a three-balled Billy goat. He said he couldn't find a girlfriend. I asked him if he would accept a girl who was like him. He said he would never accept that. I handed him a magazine, and asked him to show me a girl he would like.
He picked one like this.


I was done talking to him. Some people are beyond help. I'm not saying that's you, I'm just relating a story.

[Lionman95]

No I don´t take it as offense and I get where you come from. I think I have different problems and I´m currently trying to work on it so it might work one day but I´m not desperate to get into a relationship.

[SnowedIn]

What I think you're tell me is that each of your husband's was a fun guy?

I have been lucky in love. Several times. Maybe that's unlucky. 🤔

[Gummy_Cluster]

It's so hard to tell the difference. In the movie "The Devil's Advocate" Al Pacino explains to Keanu Reeves that love is the same feeling you get when eating chocolate. Psychology fascinates me, but right now I need to run to the gas station and get a Mars Bar.

[SnowedIn]

May I please have one too? It's been that kind of day.

[Gummy_Cluster]

I have a passion for dark chocolate, because it's a bit bitter. Offer me a Mounds bar or an Almond Joy, and I'll always go for the dark chocolate. What does it mean? (crap, I think I'm adding this to my question list.) But my next question is about why I don't like cats.

[SnowedIn]

Gummy, I love cats. Please tread lightly. I can't deal with too much in one day.

[Gummy_Cluster]

I love all animals, (except spiders and bats.) I just think that cats have some kind of entitlement attitude. I was at the Portland zoo, and there was a sign by the big cat exhibit. It said that these lazy fucks sleep 22 hours per day! I'm about as lazy as they come, but I think 18 hours is plenty! My brother's dog can read five words. You don't learn to read by sleeping 22 hours per day.

When I visit my brother on the lake, I throw the Frisbee out into the water.

Dog: Oh, my, aunt Gummy, what a great throw. I'm going to swim out and get it, and we can do this all day long.

Cat: Seriously? You woke me up for that?

[SnowedIn]

We cannot ignore that most cats can read ten words before they're one month old. To get any dog to ten words requires payments equally most small nation economies.

[Gummy_Cluster]

When I go to my brother's place, his dogs are so excited. Then three minutes later, one is asleep. The other one likes to fetch. She will fetch all night long. But here's the million dollar question. Bailey has about 30 toys with dog spit on them. We tell her to go into the bathroom, and she goes. Then we hide her ball. When she comes out, she goes looking for her ball. She finds it within 3 minutes. So how does one ball smell different than the other 29 balls? Dogs are smartly AF. I keep telling my brother that he needs to get Bailey hired on with the FBI. They can run, but they can't hide. They have three minutes... tops! And she doesn't want a pay check, she just wants snausages.

[SnowedIn]

When I was in the Navy, we had to order supplies. It's kinda fun. Until you have to fill out paperwork. I mean, it is cool when you write on the supply chit "Missile, Stinger, blah blah blah" or "Doors, Hangar Bay, Forrestal Class" and someone else writes a check. It's like shopping the old way, back when it was the Sears catalog.

But I digress.

We could, it turned out, order dogs. And different flavors of the same type. So I could order a drug sniffing shepherd or a bomb sniffing shepherd.

And, get this: it was more expensive to order the dog than it was to put a recruit through boot camp.

[Gummy_Cluster]

The gubmint gots lots of money. Mr. Snow, not to change the subject, but I was just talking to a girl on this site. I was telling her about the two nymphos I met online. These are NOT sluts or promiscuous women. These women are in a league of their own. I'm not pretty and I am overweight, but I get hit on once per day. Can you imagine if I was a hottie? The two nymphos I met were both smoking hot. I told the girl about all of this body count shit we read on this site. Those two women stopped counting in the thousands. Their stories are sad, but it ain't my circus, and it ain't my monkeys. I don't give a gerbil's ass.

But it does beg the question... What's going to happen when these male birds on this site leave the nest and go out into the real world? Do they really think that women have a body count of 1-2? I know a woman who had 10 in one day. (at a sex club) It's a cruel world out there. But you were in the Navy, so I'm sure you know way more than you even want to know.

[SnowedIn]

I never thought about that. The guys will have to leave GaG and learn that girls have sexual needs too!

[Gummy_Cluster]

I've mentioned before on this site about my friend, Roger. He's a retired photographer. He told me that women are attracted to cameras, like moths are attracted to porch lights. This site was designed, and intended to be an advice site. Now it's morphed into a pile of shit where people ask which hand you wipe your ass with. But imagine if people on here were really looking for advice...
You and I could give tons of advice. This is a conversation I had with roger.

Roger: Can I tell you my fantasy?
Gummy: Sure.
Roger: A hot babe picks me up at the airport in a corvette.
Gummy: And then what?
Roger: She drives me home.
Gummy: And then what happens?
Roger: That's it.
Gummy: That's it?

Roger was a good photographer, but I don't think he could write greeting cards like me.

The sun was shining
And we were dining
And then I spilled red wine on your shirt. And my gerbil got hit by the mail truck.

[SnowedIn]

Roger definitely needs a better finish. Pun intended.

Sorry about your gerbil. That is MY next question.

[FilmGuy93]

I've been pretty unlucky in the past. I just had this tendency to date these unbelievably vindictive women.

[Gummy_Cluster]

I just cast a spell on you, and your luck will change. (no mushrooms)

[FilmGuy93]

Thank you! I could use the help

[Adventurer23]

*slowly and carefully backs up and out of the room, quietly closes door behind me... 👀

[Gummy_Cluster]

Good idea.

[ERB62]

Other one didn't die quick enough from the poisoned mushrooms you fed him?

[Gummy_Cluster]

The third guy wouldn't eat his mushrooms. So he had to be dealt with.

[LiamJHayden]

... well

https://www.youtube.com/embed/PX-KPI9G6iM

[serious]

The answer is No. The reason is I have never tried so there is no question of being lucky or unlucky.

[NathanDavis]

define unlucky at love...

[Gummy_Cluster]

It's a second hand emotion.

[NathanDavis]

which one is the second hand... left or right?

[Shamalien]

It’s an empty handed lotion

[TheFlak38]

That's what guys say when they play rigged games. That they're not lucky enough. Rigged games cannot be won.

[FunkyMonkee]

Love? What is, "love"?

[Gummy_Cluster]

It's exactly the same as the feeling you get from eating chocolate.

[FunkyMonkee]

Chocolate doesn't give me much of any feeling other than maybe a slight tooth pain if I eat it on the wrong tooth.

[Gummy_Cluster]

I learned that from an Al Pachino movie.

[FunkyMonkee]

I've never equated love with chocolate.

[Gummy_Cluster]

The Devil's Advocate. Great movie.

[FunkyMonkee]

I think the only one I've ever seen was, "Dog Day Afternoon".

[Gummy_Cluster]

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X1Hzn1ko7WE

Watch it when you can.

[NostalgiaSenpi]

No love, just death

[Gummy_Cluster]

I hear ya.