Should I suggest breaking up with my boyfriend now we’re going to have to do long distance?

[Anonymous]

Hi everyone! So I’m currently in a bit of a predicament…. I’m currently 22 and I’m about to finish college having been with my boyfriend for 2.5 years (we met in college so have always been just down the street from each other apart from in the holidays). The problem is we’re both going back home at the end of June when we finish college, and we live hundreds of miles from one another. Ordinarily I think I’d be up for at least trying a long distance relationship and seeing how it goes but the thing that’s put me off is how against trying to be nearer to each other my boyfriend is. I have 7 close friends at college and 5/7 are in relationships and all of them have at least spoke about moving closer to one another even if it’s in the future. Whereas with my boyfriend the topic has hardly been broached, there’s been absolutely zero discussion about trying to be closer together or any kind of futures together, he just said he’s going to go where he wants regardless of me and it just makes me feel like he isn’t serious about me. I know we’re really young and I don’t necessarily want us to move in together yet either but the fact he’s so against it and it’s not even a consideration whilst my other friends have all spoke about it, makes me feel like I’m wasting a lot of hardwork trying to maintain a long distance relationship which ultimately probably won’t work out anyway. Any suggestions or advice would be greatly appreciated xx

[JasonDaMan]

I cannot make decisions for you, but I can offer some insights. It's important to have open and honest communication with your boyfriend about your concerns and expectations for the future of your relationship. If he is not willing to consider the possibility of being closer together or discussing a future together, it may be a sign that he is not as serious about the relationship as you are. It's important to consider your own needs and goals, and to prioritize your own well-being and happiness. If maintaining a long distance relationship is not feasible or desirable for you, it may be worth considering ending the relationship and focusing on your own personal growth and development. Ultimately, it's up to you to decide what is best for yourself and your future, and to communicate your needs and boundaries with your partner.

[OlderAndWiser]

"he just said he’s going to go where he wants regardless of me and it just makes me feel like he isn’t serious about me." You are right. This is a waste of your time. You shouldn't wait to the end of school to break up. It will be easer for you to move forward if you break up instead of blaming the break up on the distace between you.

[BrookeAZ90]

Yeah, sorry to say but he's all about him and sounds like you're going to have to make sacrifices that are unreasonable for this to work. And you deserve some compromise and he sounds like he will not. The distance thing is brutal. I'd have brought this up a long time ago but the fact that it hasn't come up kinda means this isn't a particularly serious relationship and hopefully it would make it easier to end because I think that sounds like the best outcome for you.

[exitseven]

If you have one of these relationships and you are the only one putting any effort into it , it will really suck for you. You will become this extra thing your boyfriend had and he will just marginalize you. You will really get nothing from the relationship. dont waste your time.

[Gibbons44]

Boyfriend, or have you had sex with him in those 2.5 years?

[Kyr0s]

Didn't you discuss the future when you got together? Like marriage and stuff?