Would you continue the relationship if your boyfriend or girlfriend was adopting a child?

[Anonymous]

My boyfriend of a few years has chosen to foster one of his students and then possibly adopt and his had the child for months and I have never met the child, but his family and friends have. Are time together has gotten less and on top of that I have never met any of his family or anyone significant in his life. I don't even know where he lives but this child lives there.

[Thatpearl26]

Well it depends. If it’s a niece/nephew or cousin that suffered a tragedy then of course I wouldn’t break up with him. However if he adopted someone out of the blue without even talking about it with me. I would feel betrayed because he chose to make an important decision without even mentioning it. Besides I feel like we would be to young to be able to raise a child properly.

[SnowedIn]

I call BS on this story. Your boyfriend of a few years? No way.

If your story is true and you're not trolling (and I don't believe that) then the least of your problems is the child.

[Asker]

I think he may be married but I can't prove it yet

[SnowedIn]

Then, again, the least of your problems is the child. BUT you're part of the problem if you've stayed with him for years and he might be married and you haven't met the family etc.

[Avicenna]

No. That is not a decision that you should make by yourself if you have a partner, so it would be an instant dealbreaker for me.

[MementoMori777]

no i wouldn't continue it for one reason, for making such a big decision and excluding me out of it

[Asker]

that's exactly how I felt excluded but I never told him because I thought it would sound selfish.

[MementoMori777]

so making the decision of raising a child and completely excluding you out of it isn't selfish? 🤣

[Asker]

Haha yes that would be selfish of him lol

[MementoMori777]

exactly so if he did call you out for being selfish not only was he selfish as well but that would also make him a hypocrite, it is what it is.