How do you handle people who say negative things about you living alone in the city and not being partnered? Why do they think you’re lonely?

[Anonymous]

[provokeesmokee]

I pity them.

Obviously they're projecting their own experience onto me.

Just because they're miserable, doesn't mean I am.

For me, I really like living single in the city. I have a really good place to live, I have fun hobbies and communities I'm part of, and I don't need to worry about providing for anyone but myself.

I'm in a better place in all aspects of my life than when I was living in the city in a miserable relationship with manchildren or an emotionally unavailable girlfriend.

[smashleyy]

Would just choose to ignore. It’s usually just projection. most people can’t be alone cause they can’t stand their own company so they assume others can’t as well.

[BoopBoopBeep]

I live in a small town, never a big city again. I generally don't hear the negative things people say about me, and I tend to not particularly care when I do. Most of the people saying things aren't as well off in life as I am, socially, emotionally, financially... i don't tend to take advice from people in broken situations themselves.

[Mynameisbobby]

Because they themselves can't handle being alone so they automatically think you must be lonely too. Most people don't know how to be alone with themselves for fear of finding out who they really are so they constantly look for ways to be distracted, never knowing who they really are. Nothing wrong with being alone.

[peedy]

I can't do anything about them people are people and they will say whatever
Don't let it bother you dont try to control things that are out of your control let them think say whatever and move on it doesn't matter what they do or say

[Anonymous]

They don't think you're lonely. They're nosy, and need to do this to validate their flagging self esteem.

[Asker]

I have this friend who basically was like “well you don’t have someone to talk to about these things who’s right next to you” after I went through a difficult time period.

[Opinion Owner]

Maybe we're just different, but unless that person is some licensed therapist and their opinion was ASKED for... then my response would just be "I'm busy👋😒" It's like cats... when they want attention, they'll come to you.

[BigDog1989]

I'm not living alone in the city. I live with my parents still in a suburb of a large city. Just over 21,000 people here

[shades777]

i mean but who cares that much to tell you? it literally does not matter

[DreamLife7]

Why do you care? Your self esteem is low

[Asker]

Becuase it’s so many people around me. I go to them about something and they remind me I’m alone, they criticize where I live, what I do for a living or am not doing for a living, etc. They have no idea how hard I worked to get to this point.

[DreamLife7]

Why are you still around them? Your self esteem low cause I could never be around people who speak ill of me

[kerrieK001]

It’s called copium lol.

[DermalPunch]

@Asker they DO know how hard you worked to get to this point, actually. They are pissed at the fact they they haven't truly figured out want they want in/out of life. Or they do know but they are too afraid to step out of their comfort zone and get it.

This is a sign you are killing it. You are a crab climbing out of the bucket and they are trying as hard as they can to claw you back down.

Just smile and focus on what you like. If you need to hit a patio with a book for an nice mojito or whatever do that and de-stress.

Then get back to killing it. I'm assuming you aren't involved in any immoral, illegal or dangerous work.

[jeffend888]

@DermalPunch But see, they have figured out what they want in life. Every day is a gift from God for them because they have families, which is the natural route that humans take and they know they won't be judged for their actions. People who have families are happy and fulfilled. I haven't met a single person who has a family who hates their life. However, the few people I do know who don't have families are angry, tense and ornery most of the time and sometimes I can't even talk to them. They have no one to keep them in check so they go down the rabbit hole of Facebook politics and can't get themselves out. Why? Because they have no life.

[DextroShade]

Because you are alone.

[Kacka]

non business where orhow i do , so no trought

[Jltakk]

I wish I could afford to live alone.

[OddBeMe]

Why do you care?