Boyfriend and I have been together about 1.5 years. He only has time to see me 2 hrs once a week. Am I too clingy to be wanting more at this pt?

[Nataliap]

We do have different work schedules and I get he has his stuff I truly do, but I just don’t feel a strong connection with him cause we only text twice a day and see each other like 2 hrs a week (no phone calls). I’m I being too needy? I just have had relationships where the person wants to at least call or see me more. Do I just need more from my partner to have a healthy relationship or am I too clingy?

[Static_In_The_Attic]

In a relationship everyone has needs & everyone has wants & in a relationship if your needs & wants aren’t being met people usually part ways & move on. As for your relationship you two have been together for almost two years & to be honest he has to be doing something right or you would of left him already. On the flip side why are you still with him & do you still love him? If you still love him make your relationship work like you have been doing & if you don’t love him you’ll figure it out.

If you work different schedules can he change shifts?

[Nataliap]

I think for me I was in a pretty toxic situation previous to this relationship where there was codependency on both sides so having the space in the beginning actually felt nice. Now I’m finding myself needing a bit more investment from him especially this far into it. Of course he has his life and stuff he wants to do but I truly do feel like I take a backseat to everything he’s doing. He said he can’t switch shifts cause he has his workout schedule set for the morning and just started another position where he works evenings as well. And that’s fine completely I understand that but I would say even on days we both have off something comes up where he pretty much works me in for 2 hrs and then has other stuff to do. In terms of love I don't know I think he’s a good guy but I don’t think I've been able to really develop a deep connection with him to call it love lol. We don’t have any phone calls either it’s basically texting how was your day type of thing and that’s it and it is very specific to our scheduled time to text. Let’s say I text him at a random time during the day it is read and not answered til our scheduled time to text.

[Static_In_The_Attic]

All relationships aren’t perfect & what you have is better than nothing but to be honest you deserve better than something. Time will tell & you will figure it out.

[BoopBoopBeep]

I spend more time than that with my trainer, and we're not in a relationship.

[Nataliap]

Lmaoo

[_Maya_]

No because after 1.5 years 2 hours a week is nothing. Is it that your schedules don't allow it or another reason? Like what is his excuse for not making time to do stuff together? I think 2 hours a week is really low for time spent with a boyfriend. Thinking back to past relationships I dated a girl years ago. We were both in school and had lots of work. We still made time to hang out despite both of us persuing degrees.

[Nataliap]

I work day shift and he works evenings so that does cut out a chunk of some days. He also works a bunch of overtime so those are definitely factors. I will say though when it comes to his days off it seems he doesn’t even want to spend too much time then. We live about 25 min from each other. So it’s usually halfway for dinner or something like that. He loves with his parents but doesn’t really invite me to stay at his house long at all and I barely go there lol.

[Nataliap]

Pretty much he is invested in hobbies or doing stuff around his house and that’s why he can barely spend a good chunk of the day

[_Maya_]

The thing is that even though he has stuff to do you still need to make time in a relationship. Something he isn't doing but should. Relationships require some sacrifices and he doesn't seem to be willing to make those to see you.

[Nataliap]

Yeah I agree lol. I wanted to make sure I wasn’t overreacting 😂 I’ve had a history of anxious attachment that I’ve been trying to heal lol

[_Maya_]

Lol no not an overraction at all in my opinion. I would be like wtf too.

[Drumlin2001]

Dosent seem much time for each other. What do you do in that time normally?

[Nataliap]

Go out to eat, bowling or the movies

[Drumlin2001]

No sex?

[Nataliap]

Nope lol

[jahaims]

I would find a way to make the schedules work better after that much time.

[MissBoogus]

Oh my goodness I couldn’t handle that