Can a toxic relationship be fixed or is it better to break up?

Question

Finchie40 · Accepted Answer

If it’s toxic then you are best to walk away , only if you know for a fact , that you aren’t toxic as well , A relationship takes 2 people , 2 people that should be choosing each other over everyone else , period , not the other way around , Most people assume they are always right and their partner is wrong , so if you aren’t pointing fingers at yourself first before pointing them at your partner , then that makes you just as wrong as well and makes you a selfish person , if you aren’t wearing your partner’s shoes the same way you expect them to wear yours, then your relationship Neil not last , it needs to go both ways or the relationship will not survive. Most people in general have a very hard time admitting to themselves that they are wrong , it’s usually always their partner’s fault no matter what. So if you have that type of mindset and a tendency to always blame your partner for things that go wrong then you will keep continuing having failed relationships , because you will always think you are right and never wrong. You can’t always get your way in a relationship, understand you are no longer single anymore , so no matter what decisions you make in life you are best to always include your partner in those decisions as well , not just assume things always have to go your way , Most people that are in relationships project their own insecurities onto their partner without realizing it , Understand you are not perfect , nobody is, we all make mistakes and sometimes we make stupid choices , when you learn to remove selfishness from within yourself , it makes it easier for your partner to remove selfishness from within themselves for you , without that, you have nothing , the relationship was a total waste of time. For love to grow between 2 people , both people have to choose each other over everyone else in this world , over your friends, over your family etc. if you can not do that for your partner, do not expect them to do that for you period.

RingOfFire · Accepted Answer

Toxic relationships can be fixed, but I am not sure it is worth the sacrifice to do it in many cases. In my case my most toxic relationship was with my father. He was a very tough man and difficult to get along with. He pretty much alienated everyone in our family. My older sibling didn't want to have anything to do with him after they moved out at age 18 and had virtually no relationship with him after that. They still remain angry with him to this day.

When I tell you he was a difficult man to get along with, I mean it. And he was a professional in medicine. You'd think he'd have people skills since he dealt with his patients all day. Hard for his family to believe... but all his patients loved him. Maybe that's why he was always so rough with his family... he had to hide his bad side all day with his patients.

Anyway, long story short it took me my entire adult life until he passed away at age 97 just a few years ago to get to a point where I was able to mend the relationship. And it never would have happened if I had not sacrificed everything in my life to take care of him in his last years. In his final times, he somehow found it in his heart to apologize to me for all he put the family through and actually showed appreciation to me for what I had done for him and I found a way to forgive him which I never thought would be possible. It was some kind of miracle because I had never heard him apologize for anything in his entire life. He also did something else I never heard him do and told me about his father and how he was mistreated by him which really was the turning point for me in understanding why he was the way he was. I paid dearly to achieve this result with my father, but to me it was the greatest accomplishment of my life.

Toxic relationships can be mended, but it can take one hell of a toll on you to do it and unless you have the strength and maturity to achieve it you should think twice about whether it is worth it or not.

AmandaYVR · Accepted Answer

The crux is what one labels "toxic". It is a wildly overused term nowadays. It's therapyspeak used to bolster and militarize one stance, one person's point of view, very often. It's too subjective to be quickly and easily conclusive.

Culture is changing, and more people are putting their hands up and feet down. This could be good in some cases, and it can be highly intolerant in other cases.

Apple1996 · Accepted Answer

I think it depends on why it's toxic. Somethings are small and can be fixed. Other things are big issues that won't be fixed

caring__1 · Answer

When we see things as challenges, they can be addressed and overcome. When we see them as obstacles, they become impassable. Once the label of toxic has been applied, the door is closed, as this would be an unhealthy relationship, not just one with challenges. There's no such thing as a little toxic. That's like saying a person is a little dead. It is or it isn't. Be cautious about applying labels to anything, as those labels can very well determine the future.

AviatorTom · Answer

Some toxic relationships can be fixed, but only when both partners are committed to the relationship. Most of the time in a toxic relationship, at least one of the partners is not fully committed to the relationship, and if you find yourself in a non-committed toxic relationship, it may be better to break up and find someone else.

Paris13 · Answer

From My Recent Experience, Toxic is No Good and W@ill Not Change. Break Up. xxoo

Billlewis · Answer

I think it depends on how much the relationship is worth to you and your partner. Some relationships, no matter how challenging they may be to maintain, are just simply too good to let go of, so we do what we have to do to keep them working properly.

Chevy1_kb · Answer

Walk away forever my toxic relationship because of my ex put me into therapy I got through we remained friends he has two girlfriends we feel fuck all for each other In the living way it took me a long time to not have any feeling for him and a don't want to again and before you say it because we remain friends will not encourage me to want him back if he doesn't feel anything for me as a friend fuck it I can just be as tough

Sunssong · Answer

Yeah and easily. Even over night. Both people have to want too and the problem has to be clear. Requires a lot of discipline though. @Lisia Basically I disagree with @Matadorius

If a relationship is toxic it became that way from lack of direction, discipline, and or accurate thought. Talking about normal people.

Discipline is easy if you understand it. If you don't it's almost impossible to change long term.

Princessvarsha · Answer

Break up dear..

toxic relationship are very bad, person get into depression and all stuffs.

so if you are going through it. Kindly leave the person. Or else it will spoil your life.

dear i have seen my friend going through this it’s very difficult believe me.

Peter_Penetrator · Answer

Better to just break up.

Toxic behavior is difficult for those individuals to recognize it in themselves.

Pointing it out to them makes them defensive.

Toxic people deflect.

Sort of like an addict or alcoholic. They first must admit it to themselves.

Curiousminds2017 · Answer

If you don’t have children with him then absolutely break up. You don’t owe him your peace and happiness.
Your growth, peace and happiness is significantly important. Sacrificing it would be a high price to pay for his feelings.

Unless there is a child or children whom you need to think about, then leave him without a second thought. Drop the relationship completely.

PeachesNCream98 · Answer

I rather be single than be in a toxic relationship. I was in a toxic relationship with my ex girlfriend. All she wanted to do was get drunk, argue, and cheat on me with other guys. Not only would she cheat on me, she would compliment and flirt with other guys in front of me.

I am glad that I longer have to deal with that noxious behavior.

Matadorius · Answer

It also depends on why the relationship has become toxic. If the frequency between the two is generally good but some issues wear out the relationship, the relationship can be improved if a dialogue is established on empathy and mutual understanding regarding those issues. However, if the problem is about things that cannot be changed easily, such as the person's character structure, perspective on life, habits, temperament, and behaviors, that relationship will not last long.

AmeerX · Answer

better to break up but before you do it's always better to get second or third opinion and think with a cool head. Is something bothering you?

Selliebeanz · Answer

It depends on certain factors. Both have to want to lay their sword down. Love has to be the motivation for both to change. Compromise has to be there.

hopegirly · Answer

i think it is better to break up. It is very hard ro rebuild a toxic relationship, usually the person who made bad for us will not change at this point, in my opinion

Friendlybro79 · Answer

I think it depends. Some people just need help and can evolve. Unfortunately some can't. Toxic used to easily nowadays. If a person has a bad day and days a few things they shouldn't (not horrific) that's not toxic.

But if it's truly awful and they try to make you the bad person somehow then get out

A_Bell · Answer

If it's toxic, it's toxic. It's like saying "let me clean this toilet water by diluting it."

Screenwriter · Answer

Toxic means poison. Unless there is an antidote to the poison, such as longterm therapy and medication, I doubt it.

OddBeMe · Answer

Honestly it depends on how sensitive each person is. My wife and I joke with each other on a “toxic” level occasionally that any newcomer into the house will be uncomfortable if they see it. But the sex is terrific.

That means we’re both cool with it.

If you aren’t cool with it, which may be why you’re asking, break up. Now. It’s not gonna change. Toxic people don’t change.

whirled_up_girl · Answer

I think it depends on how toxic it is and the individuals.

DevikaButts95 · Answer

Both of these questions lean towards yes. Lmao.

Still-alive · Answer

If i sense it will likely not get any better or she refuses to listen and improve then yeah im outta there. Id rather be single that deal with that.

lilBigPotato · Answer

It depends on how it got there but generally I think it's better to move on

lightbulb27 · Answer

Yes. The choice is whom wants to change... or both... or neither. Not easy. In some cases, I'd say, too hard, learn, do better next time.

DannyUk2017 · Answer

I'm afraid is DOOMED, as the TOXICITY is BUILD, and keeps building over time, and gives the Toxic person the feeling of Grudge, Finger pointing, Blaming more over the Other person..🤷‍♂️

bowenw · Answer

If you're referring to being in a relationship with someone that is disrespectful, dishonest, meanspirited, or controlling, it's probably best to break up. In my experience people like that don't change.

maroon_eyez · Answer

Toxic relationships always get worse.. Couples having some issues can be fixed, but if it reached a stage where you consider it as toxic, it’s already too advanced..

Anonymous · Answer

I mean if it can be fixed, it would have to be with the aid of an external source like a therapist because how can it be done internally

MrOracle · Answer

That's what counseling is for - but it requires both people to not just go, but to take it seriously. It will take some real work by both people.

Flatmanlewis · Answer

Really depends on what you’re defining as toxic behavior. Toxic can run anywhere from being slightly rude to physical violence.

summiter · Answer

If both want to make it work out it can be saved but some counseling might also help. Do you think more or less sex would help?

XXTruthfulOgrexx · Answer

Personally, No, if a person is toxic then it just isn't worth the time and effort to try and "fix" a relationship.

Aiko_E_Lara · Answer

It can be fixed but it's a waste of time and energy. Why be in a toxic relationship in the first place though?

Charliefretz329 · Answer

It’s usually toxic based on many factors.

The basis of a good relationship is rooted in respect for each other.

So I suggest absolutely not. The other person might chance temporarily but you know their true nature

Nikki1989 · Answer

Break up. It is not hard to move on and find someone new.

strateguy632 · Answer

certainly can fix they should try couple counseling.

MikeTheBartender · Answer

If it's been less than a year no kids... It's much easier to start a new relationship than fix a broken one.

hismave · Answer

I think if the 2 put heads together it can be fixed. Nothing is impossible u know

legalboxers · Answer

nope. its like spoiled milk. can't do anything with it

Evananswersquestions · Answer

Always better for both people to break up and find someone whom they match better with

LexiHunnyP93 · Answer

@lisia it depends on how bad it is. if it was me I would air on the side of caution and break up and look for a relationship that isn't toxic

AydenHazor · Answer

While they can sometimes be fixed, it is truly rare, it is truly toxic your better off ending the relationship

Masterodd · Answer

What is a toxic relationship? I don't think you can just throw out a word and try to encompass everything with it. what is (toxic) about it? what is going on? what has happened?

SpeedRacer23 · Answer

I think it’s impossible to apply a general response to any specific relationship. Some relationships have toxic elements that can heal or grow. Others are mostly toxic with few endearing or positive traits and would be best to end the relationship.

elizamichale1 · Answer

yes it can be n people shud work together to work their differences out

Fireguy17 · Answer

It's possible, both parties have to be willing to work on it.

CallmeTheKnight · Answer

No. Don’t ever think or hope for that because it’s completely naive

Anonymous · Answer

Most likely it can’t be, better off leaving it because you can’t fix it

TacosRAwesome · Answer

Maybe if both are willing to work on their problems.

LoverOfBooty23 · Answer

just because I wanna do butt stuff doesn’t make our relationship isn’t toxic @lisia 😂😉

ChefPapiChulo · Answer

depends how toxic and if the relationship is worth saving.

Anonymous · Answer

There’s so many variables for that question. So many couples have gone through lots together and remain strong and in love and honest. I don’t believe there is a one way thing here.

PrinceWalnut · Answer

It *can* be fixed, but it is almost always better to simply break up

Nifrayu · Answer

They ban be fixed, but a lot of the time it's better to break up.

boobliker · Answer

always get out it no good fixxing it waist of time

Iron_Man · Answer

People can make a come back people can change things can be fixed

Avicenna · Answer

Break up of course

Bklynbadboy12 · Answer

Well anything can be fixed as long as the two people involved are willing to put in the work

BLP11520 · Answer

Don’t waste your time on someone, your youth is too valuable 👍

Anonymous · Answer

Better to move on and look for better guy, babes

Anonymous · Answer

If I really think it's toxic.. then giving it more time will only increase your regret when u eventually have to breakup

Can a toxic relationship be fixed or is it better to break up?

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What should I do if my relationship has become too toxic? Can a toxic relationship be fixed?

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What should I do if my relationship has become too toxic? Can a toxic relationship be fixed?

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