Truth or Myth: If you can't be happy alone, you won't be happy in a relationship?

Question

IslaTheWitch · Accepted Answer

Some people can't be alone; some people need to be alone... at least from time to time...

I don't think there is such a correlation as you described...

Some time ago, I worked in a company that offered psychological assessments of candidates for managerial positions. As a perk, we could get tested. One of the results I got was that I feel comfortable with myself and don't really need the company of other people. It's true. But still, I was able to create a long-term relationship because I respected myself, my needs, and my partner. So even if I could isolate for weeks, we ate together every day, we talked, watched movies, going out...

electromagnetic · Accepted Answer

If I’m not happy alone, I want others to not be happy with me. Just like @purplepoppy said

jennifer_bloom · Answer

Happiness comes by seeking and acknowledging God and God’s value and by acknowledging the beauty and value and dignity and morality of God’s people. When people say they respect God but do not respect God’s children they are liars and worse than non believers.

Anonymous · Answer

Sort of true. I won't say completely true though.

I would put it this way. "If you're broken. Another person cannot fix you. You'll just be broken with that person. And your being broken might drag you both down.

I think a lot of people erroneously look at life as a series of factors like a balance sheet. Job, education, friends and of course PARTNER. Which isn't entirely bad or wrong. But people are not a resource for you to draw from. And you can't treat then as such. Yes a partner should care about your well being. But because you care about them you should never want to burden them with that.

I guess now that I wrote this I'm leaning herder towards true. I guess the hitch I'm having is nobody is strong forever. You hope your partner can lift you up when you can't lift yourself up. Because it's bound to happen at some point for both of you. But nobody should go INTO a relationship like that. A relationship should not be your focus if you're that out of sorts.

Seinna · Answer

Some people are extremely unhappy alone and they get better when they're in relationships. Some people thrive by being around other people, committing to them and doing things for them. I think it's beautiful. Me, personally, I'm very happy alone but I'm even happier with another person.

TwinTonyz · Answer

I'm no psychologist, but the well-known mental health implications of isolation seem to imply that pressing people into loneliness until they learn to love and satisfy themselves makes them more dissatisfied.

Moreover, and as an opinion, if you're perfectly well, able, and eager to carry on alone, that should dissuade the happy individual from any relationships in the first place

imtiaz45 · Answer

This statement carries some truth but can be nuanced. Being able to find contentment and fulfillment within oneself is indeed crucial for overall happiness, including in relationships. If someone relies solely on a partner to provide happiness and fulfillment, they may struggle in the relationship and feel disappointed if their expectations aren't met. However, it's also important to acknowledge the value of companionship and the enriching aspects of sharing experiences with others. Ultimately, a healthy balance between self-sufficiency and connection with others is key to thriving both individually and in relationships.

sheenagwapa · Answer

truth! i think you will drag your SO to the mud of unhappiness if you rely your happiness on him/her. sorry but i am a hopeless romantic. i don't want my SO to be unhappy because of me.

people come and go do you really wanna depend your happiness on them? thankfully though naturally i can be happy on my own in general. pls learn to be happy on your own. there's a feeling of independence and confidence when you know you can do that.

Katebfun · Answer

I've always been happier single. Only because I have yet to experience healthy loyal love union where I'm respected. A relationship is usually a deep transformative experience, where you'll have to face demons of anger, jealousy snd attachment. Sometimes being single is best no mirror to reflect my shadows I don't want to see.

MikeTheBartender · Answer

What a terrific question, personally I am happy single or in a relationship, but I think the majority of my friends no matter how alpha male they are or how independent woman they are, are happier in a relationship. So I think I'm kind of the exception, I think most people almost need the relationship to feel complete.

nastyb · Answer

I disagree.

Often times people are unhappy because they are lonely, and lack love in their lives. Nobody to give them a hug when they need it the most. Nobody to talk to during their darkest times. Financial problems tend to also affect singles more than dual income households.

TonyMetal___86 · Answer

Nope it's a myth, it depends on a person, for example i'm sometimes happy alone but would be happier in a relationship and when i was in a relationship, i was happy to remain alone some times...

In general, i prefer being married over being alone!

purplepoppy · Answer

You forgot option 3, you'll drag your partner down to your misery.

Hispanic-Cool-Guy · Answer

True. To start happiness starts within you as no one is responsible nor can make you feel happy 7 days a week, 30 days a month and 365 a year as that's impossible.

#2: If you're miserable and unhappy alone then it's only a matter of time til the high of a relationship fades then your unhappiness will just resurface again for whatever reason.

Chazmatazz269 · Answer

Absolute fact
I’m certain beyond all doubt that the main contributing factor to the ridiculous divorce rate in the west is people going into marriage thinking that another person can make them happy or, worse, owes them some sense of happiness.

82lynx · Answer

What I often wonder is if one has struggled to get to the point where they’re fine with being alone, particularly with a failure rate at or near 100%, why risk messing things up again by taking on a partner?

OfMiceandMen · Answer

I think that is true. Quite often the unhappy person in the relationship relies to much on the happiness of the other person, which is not a healthy relationship.

BadApple69 · Answer

A person who looks for happiness from others will be alway in sorrow.  Happiness comes from within.

NathanDavis · Answer

I'm happy either way... I hope others can be that too

dustybiker2 · Answer

More, if you aren't happy alone you won't be healthy for the other person in the relationship,

Xia1994 · Answer

That’s very true in order to be happy and content in a relationship you first need to be happy and content with your own self on your own.

DishLady · Answer

Myth. It’s just that we can’t be in relationships with excessively needy people.

LazerBean · Answer

Yes. Getting married does not in and of itself make anyone less lame.

Nikki1989 · Answer

Miserable, bitter people will always be that way. They can't be helped.

Bricealan · Answer

You have to like yourself, before anyone else can like you.

Fireguy17 · Answer

no one can make you happy, you have to be happy with yourself first.

LaurenM1997 · Answer

No i believe that being with someone will make you happy

jaxthedog · Answer

I always tell people you don't need to find someone to make you happy that someone should make you happier

Wiredone · Answer

I think being with someone will bring you happiness. It did for me. I'm much happier having a family

Guanfei · Answer

Myth. I'm not happy exactly because I'm not in a relationship. That's what makes me unhappy. Having someone is exactly what I need and what I want.

innerman · Answer

If you ain’t happy alone, I bet you only gona absorb other people’s happiness making them sad too

Paul09 · Answer

That depends. Maybe someone can put that person in a better mood. Or drag a good person Down.

jack1924 · Answer

You should try to find happiness and some people will help to do so

msc545 · Answer

It isn't clear that one thing has anything to do with the other.

RetroReviews · Answer

Loneliness can be a reason people are unhappy

genericname85 · Answer

it's true but that doesn't mean that you're not still gonna be a bit happier while being in a good relationship vs being alone.

Unit1 · Answer

Not necessarily always the case. I can not prove otherwise though.

AngryCarl · Answer

In a relationship... you'll either be half as miserable or twice as miserable.

thegreenyogi · Answer

I think to some people this applies.

Pennywise_6 · Answer

Happiness comes from with in.

ProbablyClueless · Answer

Seems to be true, based on what I've seen.

worldscolide · Answer

I'd say that's absolutely correct.

Rangers · Answer

For a man to be happy alone is simply not possible

jshm2 · Answer

Those are two very different personalities

Truth or Myth: If you can't be happy alone, you won't be happy in a relationship?

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