No question, just feeling worthless at this point in my life?

[Anonymous]

I am a 33 year old women and i feel worthless as a person. I want to be in a good relationship with a man but i honestly don’t feel worthy to be in one. I feel like everyone will be just fine without me. I overthink too much and I know I’ll drive anyone away. I don’t have friends anymore because i pushed them away, my own family is tired of me too and they don’t spend a lot of time with me. i’ve recently feel like i shouldn’t be here anymore. i know im in a horrible phase right now and it will go away but it’s real hard right now. yeah, that’s all…..

[Oliverlogan263]

Oh girl, I feels you so much. Been there so many times myself. But first things first - you gotta stop being so hard on yourself, a'ight? Every girl has her moments of doubt, but you gotta remember your worth ain't based on what anyone else says.

It makes total sense you'd be feelin this way after pushin people away - we all get in our heads sometimes. But I promise you're worthy of love just as you are. Family will always come back around too. Blood is thicker than any mood, ya feel me?

Look, why don't you try reachin out to one of your girlfriends - the real ones who'll understand. Plan a self-care night, put on some face masks, do each other's nails or whatever. A strong support system is so important. You don't have to go through it alone, boo.

And don't even think about not being here anymore! The world needs your light, mama. This too shall pass, as they say. Keep your head up - you got this. Just take it one day at a time. Let me know if you ever wanna holler, a'ight? Stay gold, girl.

[Asker]

thank you for this but i know im
not. i’m not a good person so i know im not worth of being loved even though i want to be loved, i know im not worth it.

[Oliverlogan263]

Girl, I totally understand feeling that way about yourself, but it just isn't true. We've all made mistakes - that's part of being human. But it doesn't define who you are or make you unloveable. You have so much worth that has nothing to do with your past actions.

Loving yourself is a journey, and I know it's easy to be really hard on yourself especially when you're struggling. But please try to be gentle with yourself, the way you'd comfort a good friend. You wouldn't want a friend feeling the way you do now, right?

You said you want to be loved - well that right there shows you have so much love to give. And anyone would be lucky to receive it! I know it seems impossible to believe now, but as you practice self-compassion, bit by bit you'll start to. You don't deserve to suffer for things that are in the past.

Is there maybe a friend or counselor you can open up to? Sometimes it really helps to get these feelings out. And remember - you aren't alone in this. So many people know what it's like to not feel good enough. But I promise you - you are. Please don't give up on yourself. You've got this.

[Asker]

my boyfriend recently has been pulling away from me. we have barely hung out, he barely texts me or calls me anymore and when i asked him why he would say that i am the problem. when i spoke to my therapist about this on Friday she told me that i am because all i do is nag and complain to him. he has told me that he’s starting to hate me and that he can’t stand me anymore and that he misses who we used to be even though it wasn’t perfect but it was the times where it was calm and no hatred. i miss those times too because i wasn’t who i am now. a lot has changed though from
when i was calm to know. i don’t have any hobbies, i don’t have any friends to hangout with anymore. i honestly let myself go and i think that could be some reason why my relationship with him is not doing good. i know things can get better, but it will take a lot of time and a lot of patience from my side. i hope i can get through this and have him like me again.

[Oliverlogan263]

It sounds like you've really been goin' through it with your boy lately. Relationships take work, especially when life gets heavy. But you got this - don't lose hope!

First off, cut yourself some slack. We all mess up sometimes. Focus on lovin' yourself through the process. Your wellness is the foundation.

Next up, really listen to what he's sayin' without gettin' defensive. I know it's tough to hear, but it comes from caring. Ask yourself - is there truth there I can grow from? Then make an honest plan to improve for you.

Show him you're workin' on it through actions, not just words. Pick up an old hobby maybe, spend time with other friends too so you guys can miss each other a little! Space is good in moderation.

Keep communicating what you're both feelin' in a kind way too. Compromise when ya can. With understanding and effort, I know you guys'll get through to nicer days ahead. You got this sis! Just take it one step at a time.

And hey - don't forget you deserve to be happy too, ya feel? Even if it doesn't work out with him, focus on growin' into your best self. The rest will follow. Stay strong!

[Asker]

he’s been giving us a lot of space though. we only hangout maybe once a month if that. he told me it’s because i drain him and ask a lot of questions about the past and his feelings for me so he’s mentally tired. and when i go on one of my episodes he ignores all my phone calls

[Oliverlogan263]

Ugh girl I feel you, that's super frustrating. Feeling like you're just draining your dude all the time really sucks the life outta you too, ya know? But you've recognizes it and that's the first step.

Some things that help me when I start getting in my feelings a lot - journal about it! Write down all the thoughts and questions so they're not constantly swirling in your head. That way you don't feel like you have to text/call him with it all the time.

Also maybe try picking up a low key hobby you can do solo, like coloring or word searches or something simple. That way you have something else to focus on besides overanalyzing stuff when you're alone.

And hey - it's okay to be in your feelings sometimes! We all have our moments. But find ways to soothe yourself first before always running to him. That'll take the pressure off your relationship for sure.

Plus spending more time with other friends too can help keep your mind occupied on other stuff besides just your dude. You got this girl! Little changes like that can make a big difference, and show him you're working on it. Keep your head up :)

[Lynx122]

Try and just focus on your mental health first do therapy and some activity like jogging or yoga or climbing. And try to just be fine with yourself like you're just existing and you don't have any anxiety or depression or anything bothering you, you can just be. If you can do that then you'll probably feel better in your next relationship too :) Good luck :)

[Ms_Facesitter]

You need to learn from your flaws.

Overthinking, pushing people away, not feeling worthy to be in one. Work on becoming the person you want to be. It's not going to be easy, it never is, but it takes time and work. Work.

[Account]

Why did you push away your friends? Do you have any hobbies/activities that interest you? Do you make your own money? Do you leave your house?

[Asker]

well one of my friends asked me to go pick up another friend from the airport and i couldn’t because it was in the middle of traffic hour and i was at work when she had asked me so i told her no and they both stopped talking to me ever since. i don’t have any hobbies. yes i make my own money, i have a job. the only time i leave the house is for work or to hangout with my boyfriend that barely hangs out with me.

[Account]

Your friend was not your friend if they do not understand that you have a life outside of them and you can't be there whenever it suits them, so good riddance if you were informed about the arrival at the latest moment. I think what you need is to find things that make life a bit more bearable such as finding new activities or even entertaining the possibility of getting into another field of study. Also you need to put a bit pressure on yourself to make some new connections. It is a struggle for all of us but having some hobbies will help because they will keep you more distracted. Also finding some time to spend near nature can also help in your mental state. If you can't find the will to do those slowly with baby-steps I would recommend you to see a therapist.

[Asker]

i’ve been seeing one already. Friday was my second session. it’s going to take a lot of time but holy crap it’s so hard to be positive. my boyfriend barely hangs out with me anymore, we don’t go out on dates, he barely calls me and barely texts me anymore. i always asked him why and he doesn’t know. however my therapist told me that it’s because all i do is nag him and complain to him instead of being happy. i asked him if the reason we don’t do anything anymore is because i am draining to him and he’s said yes. but I don't know how to be happy anymore. i once was happy because i was busy with my friends but now i have nothing so i’m just blah all day everyday

[AI Opinion]

Navigating through the stormy weather of self-doubt and feeling like you're not enough can be quite the emotional odyssey, but let me be your lighthouse today. It sounds like you’re caught in a whirlwind of negative thoughts, and I totally get how daunting that can be. Love, the first step towards finding that connection with someone else starts with embracing the beauty and complexity of who you are. You're more than worthy of love and belonging, trust me on this one.

It's totally okay to feel lost at times—consider it a part of this wild adventure we call life. But let's flip the script a bit. Imagine viewing each day as a fresh opportunity to rediscover parts of yourself that you love and appreciate. It might feel like your family and potential partners would be better off without you, but that's the overthinking gremlin speaking, not reality. You play a unique and irreplaceable role in this world and in the lives of those around you.

Reconnecting with friends or your family might seem like a colossal task right now, but take it one small step at a time. A simple "How are you?" message can reignite conversations and relationships. And when it comes to love, remember, fostering a loving relationship with yourself sets the stage for romance to blossom with someone else. You're not driving anyone away; you're on a journey of finding your way back to yourself, and in doing so, you'll draw the right people towards you.

Lastly, those thoughts of not wanting to be here, they're a signal—not of defeat, but that you're facing more than you should handle alone. Seeking support, whether through therapy, support groups, or heartfelt chats with loved ones, is not just brave, it’s essential. You're navigating through a tough chapter right now, but chapters end, and new ones begin, often with plot twists that bring unexpected joy and fulfillment.

Hang in there, lovely. The world is a far better place with you in it, and this phase, as overwhelming as it is, will transition into something brighter. You’ve got this, and remember, finding love starts with falling in love with the fabulous person you see in the mirror every day.

[OlderAndWiser]

What is it that you believe makes you a bad person?

[Staximus]

You should go talk to a therapist or psychologist. Stop doing whatever it is that makes people not want you around. If you don't know, then ask your family and friends to tell you what you are doing that makes them not want you around. Please do not do anything bad to yourself

[Staximus]

We all need to take responsibility for our actions. If you keep bringing everyone down around you then it's time to change your behavior, and most importantly your way of thinking. Your way of thinking is negatively affecting your life. Nobody can do this for you, you have to do it.

[Staximus]

But most importantly, you need to stop bringing yourself down. You are not at peace with yourself

[noohair]

The only person that can help you change you is yourself. If you want to change, you can. I never give up. I came back from addiction and that was not easy. If you expect to have a bad day, no matter what happens, you will have a bad day. Yada Yada. I know what you are thinking. It is too hard. Where do I start? Start when you read this. One day fix a little and then another day and so on.

[serious]

Well, I just hope you are okay. I don't know what else to say.

[melnc]

Whatever you go through, you must show compassion towards yourself even if no one else does.

[dudegreat91]

Kinda feel similar, but not because of relationships but because of where I'm currently in life. Got laid off from my job recently. You can follow my profile to talk

[jahaims]

If you can't be introspective and honest enough with yourself to fix your problems try therapy

[Asker]

i am honest. i said that i know i need to work on who i am because im the one who is starting the problems

[jahaims]

If you know what the problems are and still can't stop, you need therapy.

[ChicoFromThe305]

Why do you overthink? Stress? Anxiety?

[Asker]

all of the above

[ChicoFromThe305]

And why the low self esteem? Ask yourself deeply what is different about you compared to others that excludes you from being loved? Even psychopaths (people with brains that lack the ability to any emotions) have people that love them, think of it, people that can't love are loved, narcissists are loved (people that lack the ability to empathize with anyone else's emotions but their own) if these people are and can be loved, there's no logical excuse for you to feel like you can't be loved because even with your overthinking (something you should work on by the way) you can be loved, it's all about your perspective in it and your perspective is wrong, you are overthinking... again 😆

[DrPepper12]

You need counseling and therapy. Can you fo that?

[letmex-plain]

You don't