Is it more correct to say a cheater can love you but in a distorted manner?

[Anonymous]

Love alone can be interrupted through many different versions. Someone that's fantasizing about you 24/7 day and overly infatuated, might think that's love in their minds and still cheat.

I've only been cheated on once, dumped him and years later claimed he did loved me but in his own ways, definitely not the monogamous (one man, one woman) love most want. He had childhood abandonment issues. He and his older sister (then ages 5 and 7) saw their mother walking out of the mall, get into a car with another man and abandoned them. They were raised by their father.

Not that it excuses cheating... It doesn't but I find the saying ''If they cheat they don't love you'' to be not that accurate. Perhaps they can love you in different ways, distorted ways. What do you think?

[CupcakeTheDestroyer]

Cheaters are very capable of love, but they’re capable of loving multiple people at once.

[Asker]

They should probably be in a polyamory relationship. That way, they can have all the multiple people they want without hurting anyone.

[CupcakeTheDestroyer]

Most people cheat because they feel trapped in their relationships. Polyamory wouldn’t really change that

[KrakenAttackin]

Only a cheater would assert this.

[ItsJill]

Just like I said in another question, I believe that cheaters do love their partners, they just love themselves and their selfish proclivities more.

[Asker]

So it's like similar to someone having a problem with an addiction I guess? You have feelings and care for a person but you just can't say no to your addiction.

[Juxtapose]

Ehhhh it's the one who Carlos called super cop, Jill Valentine! How has Rebecca Chambers been doing? Can you give her my number? 👉👈

[ItsJill]

@Juxtapose heh I really like the character when I played the game.

[Juxtapose]

They are both so cool.

[genericname85]

i mean they can definitely love you. they just have an issue with loyalty and you should ditch them for that either way.

[Anonymous]

Only if you have really twisted definition of what "love" is.

[AI Opinion]

Ah, the tangled web of love and fidelity! 🌹 As a relationship coach, I see love as a kaleidoscope of emotions, sometimes clear, sometimes murky. Cheaters might love, but it's often through a cracked lens. Emotional scars, like your ex's childhood trauma, can distort how they express love. It's not love in the conventional monogamous sense, but a complex, tangled version perhaps. Remember, love should be healthy and respectful; anything less is a red flag. So stay strong and hold out for the love that fulfills you. 💖✨

[ohsheeT]

There are many many different types of love that is for sure

If you're with somebody and they cheat on you they made a choice they have to live with it I will make a choice that I will live with I will walk away

If a man and a woman have a baby they made a commitment to the baby if the man or woman cheats that is fine but they either both keep the baby or one keeps the baby and the other one comes and sees the baby they still have to hold that commitment to that baby each one of them.

You walk away from a baby you walk away from everything and just keep walking never turn around never see me again and never tell me you love me in your own way because that's okay I don't want that type of love and neither does the baby

[hahahmm]

Yeah... but, in the vast majority of cases a cheater is using you and doesn't actually have feelings for you.

In life... you can increase your odds of success by avoiding as many red flags as possible rather than play the lottery and hope that if you invest X years of your life in someone with lots of red flags that you'll get lucky and things will work out. But these days most people hate advice from people with more experience and they jump into the pool full of red flags.

[Miristheiss]

Who cares? If they cheat... don't go out with them. Who cares if they "love"?

They don't love. Cheating proves they love themselves and will always pursue their own lusts and opportunities over being faithful and not hurting the person they "love" and are "committed" to.

[Asker]

Loving themselves it's a type of love too. So basically it's self-love.

[ashakantasharma]

In a healthy relationship, love is built on trust, respect, and honesty. When someone cheats, it typically signals that one or more of those foundational elements are missing or compromised, even if they still feel love for the other person in some way.

[Belgie]

I think you can love someone without believing in monogamy. That may not be enough for a partner. Most people i think require monogamy, or at least a partner who values it as much as they do.

[GOLDFISH_smile]

You can love someone and still do bad things, even against them. Loving someone doesn't make you perfect or even good.

[Flower7]

No, I don’t believe that. When you love someone, you care about them and try not to do things that would hurt them. Cheating doesn’t align with those values.

[Asker]

So they can be confusing infatuation for love? For instance they can still feel attraction towards us, butterflies in their stomach, think about us but still cheat?

[Flower7]

No. They do not have strong feelings for their partner.

[Quigly]

No, It's an Abusive relationship. Cheaters have no respect for the person they are with and want to express their disrespect. They only respect a person that walks out the door, then it's too late.

[Asker]

yeah it's interesting that he was trying to get me back when it was too late and I dumped him immediately. So basically it takes consequences for them to know what they lost.

[Quigly]

To a certain degree. But, Bottom line they are people that just don't believe in Love. To them, relationships are about Greed and selfishness. It's not about sickness and health, Richer for poorer, till death part. Since They are not a giving personality.

The problem is that Governments have attached relationships and Marriage to Real Estate. At the end of the day, You got to have a place to live. It actually is an institution of greed. However, Some people draw the line with their selfishness and some don't. If a person has a mental illness, They don't draw any lines with their selfishness. This is why some cheat, there is no love inside them. only their own greed without a care for another person.

This is important to know. It's fundamentally who they are that's the problem. It's not something that will ever change regardless of how much they say they are sorry. The best and only thing you can do is walk away. There is no cure for their problem.

[molonski2]

Always absolutely , no doubt , the love remains and exists.

[Vegasrunner]

Cheating for men is when they don't protect or provide. Having sex w/ as many women as possible is part of being a man.

[Asker]

What about when he has both sex and an emotional bonding with another woman (the same one over a course of 4 months) and it happens to be someone you knew?

[Asker]

Then him claiming to still love his ex girlfriend.

[Vegasrunner]

@asker It's not the norm but it happens. Sex isn't emotional for men as it is for women. If he's a HV man, fight to be the main girl and be happy. If he's not, drop him and find a HV man that you admire and respect.

[CarolinaGirl5]

He doesn't love nor like u dear stop making excuses to make yourself feel good.

[Asker]

I've already long dumped him and currently going on a date with someone else. I'm just trying to see if perhaps they're confused themselves and don't even know how to love and they really (in their delucional mind) believe it's love but it isn't. Wouldn't it be similar to some lunatic person believing he's eating a delicious chicken wing but it's really leftover bones.

[CarolinaGirl5]

@asker there is no confusion. Just accept the fact you weren't who and what he wanted. Stop making excuses to make yourself feel good. You were rejected just accept it and move on

[MisfitsLover92]

No, you either love me or you don't. If you want those other bitches well... good 👋bye.

[LiamJHayden]

Cheaters love themselves. I suppose they can love others, but not as much.

[WhitneySnow]

That’s not really love

[jahaims]

A cheater can't feel love

[Asker]

Can it be infatuation what they're feeling? They might think fantasizing about a partner and lusting over them is love

[Kelly6]

Yes it’s true

[Crazzyyworld]

All men are scumbag

[ilkeerol28]

Don't be sad about the days gone by.

[KittygosMeoWW]

Nope

[Asker]

yet they can still be having those ''butterflies in stomach'' feelings and confuse that for love, so that's pretty much distorted

[KittygosMeoWW]

No I think most cheaters are able to love

[SolitarySolace]

Give up