Should I feel bad for feeling used after sex, when it was nothing serious. Also, would you kick someone out if your flatmate was coming back home?

[Anonymous]

Me and one of my friends recently hooked up with each other, we had been flirting for a while and i’d had a crush on him for ages and it finally came to a point where we agreed to just go for it as we both didn’t really want anything serious.

However, when we were planning on meeting up, I left the plans for him to organise and despite me living alone we agreed to meet at his house, he did say in previous conversations that he had a roommate but I didn't think much of this at the time as I assumed he must of agreed something with his room mate if he was saying I was okay to come over.

When I got to his house, unfortunately Iwas running a bit behind as we had originally said we would met at 6 but I got pulled into a work meeting last minute which overran, so we changed it 7. But because I was getting ready, doing my make up/hair etc and then walked to his after having a few confidence drinks I ended up getting there at 8. When I did get there, almost straight away he told me that his roommate was due back soon, from then I kind of felt that the whole thing was very rushed and after we slept together, he kicked me out right after saying his roommate was due back. I think I was at his house for about 45 mins max.

I do very much realise that this is really Bad behaviour on my part for being late and I feel bad that I was so late getting there. I think this is why it was rushed as maybe he had agreed a specific time his roommate would be back from the works night out?

I guess I just wanted to look good for him and feel my most confident. But just set myself up for it to go wrong.

Perhaps I should have pushed more for him to come round my house? Perhaps I, should have pushed more for him to come round my house? The reason why I didn't was because I felt like he wasn't making much effort at all. He kept saying that he didn't really know what he was doing and that he didn't have any 'game' with women.

[Oliverlogan263]

Girl, I totally get why you're feeling used and a little bummed out after that whole situation. Even though you both agreed it was just a casual hookup, getting kicked out right after can still sting, ya know?

It's not your fault at all that you ended up running late - stuff happens, and you shouldn't have to feel bad about wanting to take the time to feel confident and look your best. He should have been more understanding about that.

The fact that he just rushed things along because his roommate was coming back home is pretty inconsiderate, in my opinion. I mean, he should have planned that out better if he knew his roommate would be back soon. Or at least given you a heads up so you both could have made different arrangements.

As for your other question, I probably wouldn't kick someone out just because my roommate was coming home, unless it was a really serious situation. That seems a little rude, especially if you agreed to host. He should have just been upfront and said "hey, my roomie's on their way back, maybe we could reschedule for another time?" Rather than rushing you out the door.

I dunno, the whole thing just seems a little shady and disrespectful to me. You're totally justified in feeling used, even if it was supposed to be casual. You deserve way better than that.

My advice would be to just take some time for yourself, process those feelings, and don't be afraid to set clearer boundaries next time. If a guy can't show you common courtesy, he doesn't deserve your attention. You got this, girl! Better days are ahead.

[DannyUk2017]

Well sounds like he "got" what He Wanted! Now is Your turn to "cry in the pillow"... i never understand how can a Girl/Woman CANNOT SEE THE RED FLAGS fluffing around? 🤦‍♂️...
1-He gave you a Time line with and "addition" to say that He Has His "room mate" coming back "soon"... To me that sounds like a "quickie", if he was that "mature in his head" we WOULD have taken the "reins/initiative" and Let The Room mate Know that He Needs to Come Back... LATER... Another thing is that "he didn't knew what HE WAS DOING? ermmm.. empty his Balls?🤔, not a care in the World for HOW WOULD YOU FEEL IF THE TIME IS/WAS TOO SHORT? BS! So yeah... sadly you just been "used"... You could also Propose to him to Come To Your Place, but You didn't... so i guess all this "rush" falls on both PARTS! 🤷‍♂️

[PeachyPie93]

Well you were technically 2 hours late.. One hour because drinking and getting ready... you could have rescheduled, invited him to yours or just not done it lol..
I'm not sure what you are supposed to feel other than used when you fuck a guy who doesn't even want to date you.
But basically you knew what you signed up to and he never promised he would give you after care once he blew his load.. so it is what it is.. if you chose to be promiscuous get used to feeling that way.

[AI Opinion]

Ah, darling, let’s dive into this whirlwind of emotions! First, you're not alone in feeling a bit used; emotions can often sneak up on us, even when we think we're game for casual fun. Timing might not have been on your side, but believe me, if someone wants to make it work, they will—roommate or no roommate!

Your desire to look stunning is absolutely valid, and that confidence boost is priceless. His hosting etiquette could definitely use a little finesse. I wouldn’t sweat it too much. Next time, communicate your feelings and set clearer expectations; your comfort always comes first. Remember, if someone doesn't appreciate your fabulousness, they might just be waving a red flag. 💃😊

[es20490446e]

Plan for being before time.