What's more important to you right now -- "commitment" or "having options"?

Question

Commitment  is about making the conscious daily choice to love and cherish the person you're with in a way that can't be shaken by time or circumstance. Having Options  is about keeping the door open to let an infinite stream of other people in and out of your life as potential (temporary) people of interest in your life (usually fleetingly till the next person comes along).

Summeroflove · Accepted Answer

Once you’re serious about someone you should want commitment. Wanting to keep the door open means you’re probably going to cheat as well as looking for someone better. Narcissists are huge on doing this by dating people getting into committed relationships but secretly looking for better. The truth is that nobody would ever be good enough for them.

People should know what they want but when they find the one they want to be with. Once you get married that’s a decision you should plan on for life unless there is abuse, cheating, or it’s just miserable. Otherwise people should stay together

Finchie40 · Accepted Answer

The way society is today , options, unless I meet a girl that is really in it for the long haul and not the short haul. I no longer rush into committed relationships with girls’ because most of them lie and most of them are selfish and only want what’s best for themselves. So Words mean nothing to me without Actions. I value relationships and commitment with a girl that chooses me like I choose her. That makes me her top priority the same way I will make her mine. Only time can tell if she is blowing smoke up my ass or not

BonbonEmpress · Accepted Answer

Well I have a husband who I am committed to staying in a relationship with and he is too but we have an open relationship where we still indulge in certain activities with others such as making out & sex in a non-romantic sense. For those who're wondering how we're comfortable with such a relationship, we communicate very clearly with each other and have strong trust (we've been in an open relationship since high school when I was 16 and him 17 but we just got married last year when I was 22 and him 23).

Vesuvius87 · Accepted Answer

Before meeting my husband and childless, I was in the dating market with options.  Afterwards (and now pregnant), commitment. I'm permanently off the market.

OlderAndWiser · Answer

At age 70, there is an incredible assortment of single women available to be, and I’m sure many of them would be fun and entertaining. But i am not interested in the flavor the month that will disappear from the menu in 30 days or less. I am married and planning on spending the rest of my life with Miss Helen.

Purpleronnie · Answer

In the context if relationships , for me it can only ever be about commitment, your either all in or your out. At times of hardship in a relationship you may feel your commitment waver , but this is why we communicate , feelings aren’t necessarily based on fact.
Having choices , to me that’s either about fear of commitment or missing out and when either is the case , you’re not invested. Why would we choose to be with someone whilst not also invested in a committed relationship. Should your partner verbalize to you that he or she is NOT committed , what would that mean to you?
Simply put , if you want choices don’t choose to be in a relationship.

Grond21 · Answer

Commitment, hands down. I just proposed, so it fits

Zack-Bann · Answer

I think true commitment comes when you have all the options in the world and you chose the one for you.
Otherwise it’s just “settling”

I often envy a few good friends of mine for being in relationships but then I have to remind myself that I would date neither of their girlfriends if I had met her first
(In one case I actually did meet her first and she had a thing for me for a while)

So yeah it’s a slippery slope.
We all want a semblance of love and affection

But it’s crucial not to rush into it

MrOracle · Answer

If you are even thinking about "options", you have no business being in a relationship. People who want to keep their options open should be up-front that they are just looking for casual fun. And plenty of them ARE up-front about that, though their partners don't always listen when told that.

It's really not that difficult to be honest.

Valdemort · Answer

Commitment all the way.  I hate the whole "having options" kinda living - even when I'm not dating. Lol.  Likely why I don't like to date anyway.

Beachbummama84 · Answer

Oh I’m not looking for a commitment at all. Maybe some fun but not even that really. I want my options. I’m 40 i hate dating!! Guys are only looking for sex from a 40 year old single mom. I’d rather work on my garden than date lol

pav616 · Answer

I have always been a fan of the relationship. Most of my adult and teen life i have been in committed long term relationships. 2 in fact. In between those two and during a break of 3yrs in my second relationship I allowed myself options and it was fine and free but also the least happy I've been in my life

OneViewpoint · Answer

Options are my preferred solution at the moment. I don't want an adult female to take care of again at the moment. I prefer having control over my time and choosing when and how much I want to interact with other people. And I enjoy a constant stream of new people to being limited to one person constantly. Sooner or later, one person gets stale. Been there, done that.

ManOnFire · Answer

Commitment without a doubt. Having options really doesn't mean much. You can have 10 options but most or none of them could even amount to anything real or lasting.

molonski2 · Answer

I think it would certainly be commitment, if I had that option right now , both sound good via those definitions , however at my age I think commitment would be far more positive.

Anonymous · Answer

Commitment, but a lot of people my age haven’t found the right person yet

NathanDavis · Answer

I've only been in exclusive and committed relationships before... I really don't know of other ways

Lliam · Answer

For the past 28+ years, mine has been 100% commitment to my wife.

Sunrising · Answer

I think it's definitely options at present for me.

dragoblack · Answer

I just want a woman that treats me as a person, communicates what she wants, doesn't do manipulative behavior, doesn't treat me differently after being vulnerable, takes interest in what i envoy and allows me to take interest in hers, works on herself, has emotional intelligence, is willing to have a healthy relationship without massive amounts of drama.

SleepingHazard · Answer

People who need options are insecure. They probably shouldn't be dating in the first place.

worldscolide · Answer

Prior to meeting my wife, Options.. After meeting her. Commitment.

Communicationisking · Answer

Can totally have both simultaneously if you and your partner set rules boundaries and communicate well

Katebfun · Answer

Well in order to find the right fit. You need to have options to settle down with commitment..

HungTexan · Answer

For me right now it’s commitment.

CubaPirate · Answer

Commitment because that's what I signed up for

Shiprex · Answer

Commitment and relationships are so much easier than the flip flopping in and out of different people you want gratification from.

TheLovelyWoman · Answer

If I can start it all over again, I would choose option.

Willowwww · Answer

Nothing is importan in this meaningless life

lucass120 · Answer

I would prefer to be committed, but ok with my partner being open at the same time

Professor-college · Answer

I would say that I am in the middle because I am willing to meet someone for a serious relationship but I'm not completely fixated on the idea... If I meet someone who is a great partner that will be awesome but if I don't that's fine too

Jay-_- · Answer

I've been waiting for commitment relationship since I was 15 but that's not women nowadays.

BCRanger10 · Answer

"Commitment" is my only option 😆

Anonymous · Answer

Commitment. I'm in it for the long haul and this requires one woman. Just one. It just so happens that I've known mine since before recorded records.

BlueJeanBaby1994 · Answer

Commitment especially now being married especially in my 30s. The options thing is nice in beginning but gets old.

Shy_Steve · Answer

I don't have either at the moment. Personally I would be happy with either.

Joshydavid25 · Answer

Commitment, it's not even a contest..

MicahRaine · Answer

Honestly, neither.

Friendlybro79 · Answer

Looking for commitment

Staximus · Answer

Commitment if I had a woman to commit to

rosemilk · Answer

big fan of commitment

Fireguy17 · Answer

Commitment.  I like being married to my wife.

exitseven · Answer

I am very married and am very committed.

Skfisllw · Answer

First one

PrincessFiona · Answer

I want both 🤷

What's more important to you right now -- "commitment" or "having options"?

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